Difficult situation with a best friend

[room101]

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I hav been friends with a girl for only around half a year but we hav grown so close it is unreal. we talk none stop n we can tell eachother anything. recently we hav both discussed how we like eachother. I hav been crazy about her for ages n am so happy she likes me 2. but she also likes her ex still n has been sortin things out with him. i hav no idea what i am meant 2 do. she has said she doesnt want 2 hurt me but i am sure i will be as it seems definate that they will get back together. does anyone hav any advice on what i could do to improve my situation?

[Magus]

Just because you have good conversation with a "girl" don't mean your gonna be with her. When your "northern brain" tells you something, go with it. The southern brain may be the one us guys listen to most often, but it don't give the best of advise. Break it off n find someone else man. The only good reason to stay friends with a girl you "like" is that your getting something you want or need. Like, help with homework, dates with her other friends (or other social connections), or (of course) sex.

Thats just the cold, hard truth of the matter guy.

 

Good luck man, your gonna need it.

[kit4kat]

I'm kinda in a similar situation. My closest guy friend likes me, and has for a little over a year now. He's so great, we talk almost daily, have a bond and deep connection that blows both of us away, we've even recently been talking more openly about feelings and such-- we've even discussed marriage!! Its a big step because he had never told me before how he felt, I always heard it from other people. Now I'm just trying to get him to open up even more about it... life is so much easier when things like this are out in the open. Its been my experience that sometimes once you tell someone a big secret you've been keeping from them that it can bring you even closer. Anyway, I got a little sidetracked... the only problem is that I don't really feel the same way. I like him a little bit, but not enough for me to risk our friendship over. Its hard because he always wants to spend money on me, or do nice things for me, and I'm really uncomfortable accepting these things from him. I always feel like I'm going to lead him on in some way. He and I have discussed this before, and he knows that I don't feel the same as he does and he says that I can't lead him on.

 

I've thought about ending our friendship, actually I pretty much did once. He left for three months and he didn't really leave things on good terms with me. I was upset and determined not to start a friendship with him again... apparently God had other plans though. My best advice to you would be to back off. It seems she wants to get back with her ex or whatnot. In all my 21 years as a female, I can tell you that if you back off, and she wants you, she'll make some type of guesture to let you know. Whether its talking to you more, randomly doing nice things for you, ect... Another point I'd like to make, if she and her ex split once, it'll more than likely happen again.

 

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.