How often do you talk?

[momto3boys]

How often do you talk during separation while waiting for a divorce? We have 3 kids together and I haven't spoken to him in days. Everyone says that's weird but he just had them over te weekend and what exactly are we suppose to talk about? Lol

[TheBladeRunner]

How often do you talk during separation while waiting for a divorce? We have 3 kids together and I haven't spoken to him in days. Everyone says that's weird but he just had them over te weekend and what exactly are we suppose to talk about? Lol

 

As little as possible and when you do keep it strictly business.

[Yarrow]

What BladeRunner said. There's nothing more to say. He's made his position clear, as have you.

 

And if he gets particularly mean (mine was sending me weird blackmaily texts and profanity laced emails for a while), then you might have to tell him to have his lawyer talk to your lawyer, then disengage. Hopefully it won't come to that.

[TheBladeRunner]

You have kids, you WILL have to deal w/ the STBX........check out the link (I think my first thread ) to help you with limited contact. Not sure of your total situation....here's a little about mine......enjoy!

[Shocked Suzie]

As little as possible! Not spoken verbally to mine properly for over a year... Via email since December .... It is heaven!!! Peaceful and allows self focus/rebuild,

 

My kids sort out their own arrangements with their dad

 

Whatever comes out of my ex's mouth is pure BS... So I figured what's the point in conversation

 

SS x

[EverySunset]

Why is it weird?

 

I do most discussions by email or text, and I've saved every one to show what an insufferable jerk he is (and how business and non-combative I am). We have a daughter but he barely reaches out to her so I refuse to put her out there like two day old meat on the counter. When he asks, I answer efficiently and without emotion. Although I can be almost friendly we are not friends.

 

If it doesn't concern his children, it doesn't concern him.

[mammasita]

When my exH and I were divorcing the only time we spoke was to discuss when we were picking up and dropping of our son.....strictly arrangements regarding him usually once a week or so.

 

We're a bit more friendly now that he's remarried and our son is older. Granted we don't just call to chit chat, all convos revolve around our son probably every other week, but we can joke around a little more now.

[momto3boys]

Well he left a month ago. He was textin me atleast every "few days to see how the kids are (but this was before he started taking them over night). Everyone's automatically says "sounds like he has a gf". But I don't text him either. I have nothing to say to him. He left (this isn't the first time wa left). Told me he regretted marrying me and felt stuck so he clearly doesn't want me in his life so why should I reach out to him? I'm not exactly sure why everyone is acting like it's some huge deal that we don't really talk now that he's gone. I assumed that's how it would end up lol

[iris219]

I'd say most divorcing couples speak as little as possible.

 

My FI talked to his STBX maybe once week, and that was via text, and had to do with coordinating pick-up of the kids (they have 50/50 custody). There were a handful of times they talked on the phone to discuss/argue about the contents of the separation agreement. Now that they are divorced and have a set schedule for the kids, they are in contact even more infrequently. They have no reason or desire to speak to each other and wouldn't at all if it wasn't for the children.

 

I have a friend who is separated and she hasn't spoken to her STBX in about 5 months. Separation agreement is signed, divorce will be filed in October (1 year mandatory waiting period here). They have no children, so after the divorce, they will never speak again according to her.