pygora1994 Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 I am/was friends with a guy. We had a fight about 2 months ago, and he stopped talking to me. He said he was done with me and we could no longer be friends. About 2 weeks ago I sent an written apology and a care package saying I would like to be friends again. I sent a follow-up e-mail asking what I could do to mend the fences. After the e-mail I got a response back saying he was under a lot of stress at work he was have a rough time with life in general. He said he needed to get through some things in the next couple of weeks before being able to think about being friends again. He asked me to leave him alone for the next month to think through things. I should probably add that my friendship with him was very complicated at points. we are both gay, we dated for a little bit off and on. I know had (maybe still do) deeper feelings for him than simple friendship. our fight was pretty stupid, petty and ugly. It was mostly my fault and I said things I really should not have said. I am just unsure exactly where we are. Obviously I have to leave him alone for now, but I don't know if its a sign of recovery, or I am pinning my hopes on something that won't recover. Link to post Share on other sites
MikeyBe Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 He gave you an answer and told you to leave him alone for a while so he can deal with his life. If you want to be his friend then you should respect his answer. Problem is, sounds like your issue isn't losing a friend but losing a love interest. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cafe au lait Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 Well, it's kind of hard to know where you are because right now you're not speaking to each other (which is the right thing to do, since he asked you to leave him alone for now!). It could really go either way; he might want to be friends again or he might not. It seems like you really did your best to reach out by sending him a care package, handwritten note, etc. Unless you did something egregious (which it doesn't sound like because you said your fight was simply petty), I'd say you have a fair chance. The ball's in his court now. I know what's it like to want to obsess, and you could ruminate over the tone of the email he sent you, the feeling of the fight you guys had, etc., but it really does no good. I suggest you keep yourself occupied otherwise and hope for the best, knowing you've done all you could! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author pygora1994 Posted June 6, 2014 Author Share Posted June 6, 2014 He gave you an answer and told you to leave him alone for a while so he can deal with his life. If you want to be his friend then you should respect his answer. Problem is, sounds like your issue isn't losing a friend but losing a love interest. I am hesitant to call him a love interest necause our relationship really never developed. I don't have any intentions to pursue a romantic relationship with him at this point. we were always primarily friends and we only dated a couple of times. I think it made things complicated, and I had feelings for him, and I know he had feelings for me. However I value his friendship, and I don't view him primarily as a love interest. Its like being in love with your best friend type of deal. Link to post Share on other sites
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