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Can I reinitiate contact?


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You are overthinking it. If you want to meet him in June, meet him in June. If not, then wait. Honestly, it doesn't really matter either way.

 

 

Hmm really? I feel like if we were to reinitiate things, it's better to spend time continuously/consistently than having to wait for a month or longer between 1st and 2nd, no?

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Simon Phoenix
Hmm really? I feel like if we were to reinitiate things, it's better to spend time continuously/consistently than having to wait for a month or longer between 1st and 2nd, no?

 

No, why would it matter? You aren't going to be jumping right back into the middle of the relationship anyway, or even really dating right away. I mean, if you are looking for this guy to take you back right away then you are going to put yourself in a world of pain. At best, you'll be dating and when you first start dating someone, you don't spend every day with them -- you might spend 1-2 days per week, then slowly up the ante as you go. I think you are jumping way ahead.

 

If you want to meet him in June -- which is going to be a catch-up session since you haven't seen each other in so long -- just tell him that you are going out of town in July. He won't be offended by that; if the get-together is good, the month off might actually make him really eager to see you when you get back. But if you'd rather wait until August, then wait -- this isn't a race.

 

I feel that you are putting the cart before the horse by assuming that you are going to be hanging out a lot, at least at first. That's usually not how new relationships happen, and that's exactly what you'd be doing, getting into a new relationship. You need to get through the first meeting first before worrying about how often you'll be seeing him. Who knows, you might meet up and you'll realize that you don't want to be back with him. Or he'll tell you that he only sees you as a friend. You need to pump the brakes a bit.

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No, why would it matter? You aren't going to be jumping right back into the middle of the relationship anyway, or even really dating right away. I mean, if you are looking for this guy to take you back right away then you are going to put yourself in a world of pain. At best, you'll be dating and when you first start dating someone, you don't spend every day with them -- you might spend 1-2 days per week, then slowly up the ante as you go. I think you are jumping way ahead.

 

If you want to meet him in June -- which is going to be a catch-up session since you haven't seen each other in so long -- just tell him that you are going out of town in July. He won't be offended by that; if the get-together is good, the month off might actually make him really eager to see you when you get back. But if you'd rather wait until August, then wait -- this isn't a race.

 

I feel that you are putting the cart before the horse by assuming that you are going to be hanging out a lot, at least at first. That's usually not how new relationships happen, and that's exactly what you'd be doing, getting into a new relationship. You need to get through the first meeting first before worrying about how often you'll be seeing him. Who knows, you might meet up and you'll realize that you don't want to be back with him. Or he'll tell you that he only sees you as a friend. You need to pump the brakes a bit.

 

True that in most parts. Was just thinking in the early stage of dating, consistency really matters and having a long break isn't good at rebuilding things. I personally had lost interest in someone that I didn't get to hang much initially because he got really busy between the first and the second date. Thanks for the note though.

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Simon Phoenix
True that in most parts. Was just thinking in the early stage of dating, consistency really matters and having a long break isn't good at rebuilding things. I personally had lost interest in someone that I didn't get to hang much initially because he got really busy between the first and the second date. Thanks for the note though.

 

Then wait until August if that's what you are more comfortable doing.

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