kjackson1 Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 Update from previous post My ex and I split up around 8 months ago, we were in a relationship for over two years. She broke up with me and I attempted to get her back. I was tired of her wishy washy behavior and have been solid no contact for 5 months. For the last month or so I have been receiving text messages from her saying how much she misses me and she thinks about me a lot. I was invited to a super bowl party from my best friend. My ex was supposed to go but she didn't. When i got there my best friends wife showed me a text my ex sent that said she couldn't go because she still had feelings for me and she knew it wouldn't be a good idea if she went. I then got a text from her last week saying its hard to believe we have been broken up a year and she was certain we were going to work it out at some point. I received advice on this in the break up section before I broke no contact. My ex called me today and I decided to pick up. She was just telling me some of her problems and was seeing what I was up to. We were both joking around and I decided to broach the subject of her text. I asked her why she text me that last week. At first she said I don't know then she said because she thinks about me a lot. She repeated herself again. I told her it was weird and she said no it wasn't. The rest of the conversation was just us joking and I let her go. Does this seem like just breadcrumbs or could this be something more? How would you approach the situation on dating again? Any advice appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyConnection23 Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 If you really want to get back together and really want to see her, ask her over the telephone to get a drink or coffee. Her reaction to that should be a solid indicator. Link to post Share on other sites
toolforgrowth Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 Well, the indicators are there that she probably wants you back. However, she didn't come right out and say it to you, did she? I think you handled it really well. You spoke on the phone, you laughed and joked, you brought up the text, and she said she missed you and thought about you. But what she did not say was that she wants to try again and that she was wrong for breaking up with you. It seems like you intuitively picked up on that and politely ended the conversation. I wouldn't put my eggs in this basket unless she were to give me more to go on, but that's just me. YMMV. If you're really interested in rekindling something, just sit back and wait for her to make the next move. As the dumping party, I believe it should be her responsibility to broach that subject. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
OwMyEyeball Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 Does she want you back or does she want emotional support and security during some difficult times she's experiencing. Where will she be once she starts feeling stronger? Where were you at in your life when she decided to break things off? Has she been seeing anyone else while you guys have been split? Right now you might just seem like a safe island during a fierce storm. Do you think she sees you as her rock? Or as her stepping stone? Tread lightly. And leave the ball in her court. If she wants you for you she'll come out and ask. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kjackson1 Posted June 11, 2014 Author Share Posted June 11, 2014 Thanks for the advice everyone, I do think it's a tough subject for her to broach if she does want to give it another try. Meeting up for coffee seems like a good idea. Link to post Share on other sites
Marco Valerio Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 Update from previous post My ex and I split up around 8 months ago, we were in a relationship for over two years. She broke up with me and I attempted to get her back. I was tired of her wishy washy behavior and have been solid no contact for 5 months. For the last month or so I have been receiving text messages from her saying how much she misses me and she thinks about me a lot. I was invited to a super bowl party from my best friend. My ex was supposed to go but she didn't. When i got there my best friends wife showed me a text my ex sent that said she couldn't go because she still had feelings for me and she knew it wouldn't be a good idea if she went. I then got a text from her last week saying its hard to believe we have been broken up a year and she was certain we were going to work it out at some point. I received advice on this in the break up section before I broke no contact. My ex called me today and I decided to pick up. She was just telling me some of her problems and was seeing what I was up to. We were both joking around and I decided to broach the subject of her text. I asked her why she text me that last week. At first she said I don't know then she said because she thinks about me a lot. She repeated herself again. I told her it was weird and she said no it wasn't. The rest of the conversation was just us joking and I let her go. Does this seem like just breadcrumbs or could this be something more? How would you approach the situation on dating again? Any advice appreciated. If you think is worth the shot...do it, if not continue with NC, not only for your good, also for hers. Link to post Share on other sites
mangetout Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 Massive signs she wants you back.She is probably worried that you will say no. Just ask her outright over coffee. I doubt she will say no. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author kjackson1 Posted June 13, 2014 Author Share Posted June 13, 2014 (edited) Massive signs she wants you back.She is probably worried that you will say no. Just ask her outright over coffee. I doubt she will say no. Surprised you feel so strongly about her wanting to get back together. Edited June 13, 2014 by kjackson1 punctual Link to post Share on other sites
somegoodman Posted June 14, 2014 Share Posted June 14, 2014 No, don't even think about asking her on a date. If you have to talk to her, remain disinterested and noncommittal. Do not chase. Do not give her details about your life. Treat her like she's an enemy spy from a foreign power; remain superficially cordial and polite but keep your guard up. Do not ask her for coffee/dinner/falafels NOTHING. If she asks you, hesitantly agree to it and then blow her off. If she persists, you can meet her for one date and again keep your guard up. You'll know how genuine she is if you keep this up, eventually she'll break. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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