AnnieAddicted Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Hey, thanks in advance to whoever reads my q and tries to help! I'm in University, and I am very confused by my crush's actions. I often compete with him when it comes to school and most of the time we have similar grades. For some reasons, his personality is similar with mine. He is sociable, optimistic, willing to help anyone who needs help and not to forget that he has a good fashion sense. He's pleasant looking but I have better looking guys in my class so it's not arousal. It's more likely his attitude that drawn me to him. I like that he is motivated and calm. Here comes my problem. I had to sit next to him twice (I didn't have a choice) so he talked to people in front of him, didn't say a word to me and would fidget a LOT next to me, even his position was distanced and facing the door. Sometimes I get the feeling that he is judging me, because he would always laugh loudly whenever I say something odd, plus that I've catch him a few times looking straight at me without any emotion in his face (I like to believe that he was day dreaming tho). I tend to seem stuck up (been told that/but it's not true) even if I smile a LOT. So I decided to try to at least say 'hi' to him and smile. I told him 'hi' and whenever I did it, he would not even politely look into my eyes, he would look down and say quietly 'hi' back, which is odd because he smiles when he does it to other people. I don't talk to him, I'm not obnoxious and I don't gossip. What can be wrong with my behavior? I am so angry at myself and frustrated about this that I tried my best to erase him from my mind. This summer I will keep myself busy by: working 12h a day, taking one month of training in consulting, going to Germany for 2 weeks and right after that, because I applied and I was accepted, I'm going to be an exchange student for one semester, so THANK GOD I will not get to see his eyes for 5 months plus the summer~ I don't check his Facebook and I try to stay as far away as possible from him. I never dated any guy before (not even held hands/ kiss whatever) and my actions may seem childish, I do admit! Is just that it never happened to me before! I would usually crush on someone for max 2 weeks and I would be over it after that! If all of this is not going to work, I don't know what I'm going to do with my life! I still have a few weeks of this University year, so I have to see his face almost everyday. Oddly enough and because this FATE sucks, he always ends up sitting in my proximity, no matter how often I try to change the seats so I will stay far away. :mad: Link to post Share on other sites
jbelle6 Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 I wouldn't agonize over it if you are going to be going away for months. Link to post Share on other sites
ktya Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 The short answer to your question is simple. He talks to everyone but you because he has a crush on you. Ask him out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted June 20, 2014 Author Share Posted June 20, 2014 I wouldn't agonize over it if you are going to be going away for months. Thanks! You are totally right! It's just a waste of time Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted June 20, 2014 Author Share Posted June 20, 2014 The short answer to your question is simple. He talks to everyone but you because he has a crush on you. Ask him out. I highly doubt so, I thought that maybe something about my personality was off that made him behave like that. I will never know, I guess. Thanks anyway Link to post Share on other sites
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 What a waste of a post... the header said it all! he fancies you and he feels awkward around you! FFS will you give the poor guy something to go on lol! good luck hun xx Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 I read body language and have always been able to tell a guy who is interested in me.....they cant help it....lol....in saying that i guess it is because i feel nothing close to my heart..... for them i can read them well, because i fell hard for this guy and i read his signals......and i got it wrong i would also say this guy is interested in you or like in my case the guy could think you were disgusting and creepy not worth looking at...basically he told me this by text.....thoughtless and dispassionate person wanna kick his butt..........when all i did was care what he felt about me for i cared for him...... its up to you what you do ........follow your heart ....get him to look up.....and you look up...try to talk to him and smile often.......give him lead way to open up...best of luck....deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted June 20, 2014 Author Share Posted June 20, 2014 What a waste of a post... the header said it all! he fancies you and he feels awkward around you! FFS will you give the poor guy something to go on lol! good luck hun xx For some reasons your reply made me laugh and smile~ Thanks~ If only everything was this simple. I have doubts that he would like me. I just don't understand why someone would act this awkward if they seem so confident with everyone. It just doesn't make sense! I feel really angry at myself for having my crush acting like that with me and not getting to befriend him. Actually that was all I wanted. But I don't have the guts because his behavior 'screams' that he doesn't want to have anything to me like I wrote in my original post, so why would I try. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted June 20, 2014 Author Share Posted June 20, 2014 I read body language and have always been able to tell a guy who is interested in me.....they cant help it....lol....in saying that i guess it is because i feel nothing close to my heart..... for them i can read them well, because i fell hard for this guy and i read his signals......and i got it wrong i would also say this guy is interested in you or like in my case the guy could think you were disgusting and creepy not worth looking at...basically he told me this by text.....thoughtless and dispassionate person wanna kick his butt..........when all i did was care what he felt about me for i cared for him...... its up to you what you do ........follow your heart ....get him to look up.....and you look up...try to talk to him and smile often.......give him lead way to open up...best of luck....deb Thanks for the reply! So you read right body signals from guys that you don't like but can't for the guy that you actually like? That's unfortunate! I guess that this applies to me as well! Damn, your ex-guy crush was such a p**sy for not even having the guts to tell you that face-to-face! I'm sorry for what happened to you! You seem like a great girl who deserves a real man to love you not a selfish and heartless dude! It's such a waste that you put your heart out there and he did that~ But I'm sure that life will take care of him If you would like, you can pm and tell me everything about the signals that he gave you before showing his real face because maybe this is the case for me as well! Honestly, I was angry at myself for waaay too long about this. Just screw it. I am not going to do anything. If he really wanted to befriend me, he would at least tried to be polite, not be so awkward. Yesterday it was so weird, he basically sat in front of me for a while without saying a word. Of course I pretended I didn't see him. It's just frustrating how much this life hates me! Why does he have to be so often in my proximity? I don't understand! Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted June 21, 2014 Share Posted June 21, 2014 He either likes you so much so he is nervous to talk to you or he is hates you for no reason...... Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 21, 2014 Share Posted June 21, 2014 Men aren't super fond of competing with the women they like. I was like you in college. Very smart, not very socially savvy. I often came across as stuck up but it was really shyness covered by defensiveness as a protective measure -- not an very easy wall to break through for a young man. He may not have noticed you as anything other than a rival. You will have to find away to let down your guard & spark his interest. Spend the summer having fun. When school resumes if you have another class with him, make the 1st move & offer to study with him. Say something like since we're gonna set the curve anyway, we might as well join forces. Link to post Share on other sites
aprilisi Posted June 21, 2014 Share Posted June 21, 2014 sounds like typical grade school behavior. The boy will pick on the girl, annoy her. Treat her different. Had a boy in 6th grade who was like that. He was nice with everyone else, he would ignore me for long periods but when he wasn't ignoring me he would pick on me. But it ended when he pushed me and I hit my head hard on the floor, knocked me out. I hated him for the rest of school. We're Facebook friends now. He apologized, saying he still felt bad about it. But he liked me. I thought he was just a bully. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted June 22, 2014 Author Share Posted June 22, 2014 He either likes you so much so he is nervous to talk to you or he is hates you for no reason...... I guess I'll never know. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted June 22, 2014 Author Share Posted June 22, 2014 Men aren't super fond of competing with the women they like. I was like you in college. Very smart, not very socially savvy. I often came across as stuck up but it was really shyness covered by defensiveness as a protective measure -- not an very easy wall to break through for a young man. He may not have noticed you as anything other than a rival. You will have to find away to let down your guard & spark his interest. Spend the summer having fun. When school resumes if you have another class with him, make the 1st move & offer to study with him. Say something like since we're gonna set the curve anyway, we might as well join forces. Thank you for the advice. You seem to read me very well. I hope that it is just like you said and it's no hate or something, but simply that he sees me as his rival. Actually, because I will be away for all these months anyway, I will look at him and kindly smile these last 2 weeks of university, just to show him that I am harmless. This time I will make it obvious. I don't care whether he will take it nicely or not, I will be away anyway Love your last phrase! Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted June 22, 2014 Author Share Posted June 22, 2014 sounds like typical grade school behavior. The boy will pick on the girl, annoy her. Treat her different. Had a boy in 6th grade who was like that. He was nice with everyone else, he would ignore me for long periods but when he wasn't ignoring me he would pick on me. But it ended when he pushed me and I hit my head hard on the floor, knocked me out. I hated him for the rest of school. We're Facebook friends now. He apologized, saying he still felt bad about it. But he liked me. I thought he was just a bully. It's fortunate that in the end you've found out what was with his behavior. It was nice to read your little story (I'm sorry for the fact that he was so brutal with you tho and I hope that your head is perfectly ok now with no damages for life or something) . Now it gives me hopes that someday he will tell me what was about the way he acted towards me too. I will look forward to that. Even if it was for another reason and not that he liked me but at least I will know Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted June 22, 2014 Share Posted June 22, 2014 sounds like typical grade school behavior. The boy will pick on the girl, annoy her. Treat her different. Had a boy in 6th grade who was like that. He was nice with everyone else, he would ignore me for long periods but when he wasn't ignoring me he would pick on me. But it ended when he pushed me and I hit my head hard on the floor, knocked me out. I hated him for the rest of school. We're Facebook friends now. He apologized, saying he still felt bad about it. But he liked me. I thought he was just a bully. Wow, i guess he had some serious issues.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author AnnieAddicted Posted July 9, 2014 Author Share Posted July 9, 2014 Hey everyone ~ I just wanted to add a little update to this thread. Apparently he doesn't hate my guts or something. Few days ago, we had to do some application in the info lab and he probably saw on my computer screen that I had no difficulty solving it. Because of that, he started calling me by my real name 3 times (a name that I despise to be called by, and he knew DAMN well, because I made sure that even my teachers knew that I hated being called like that). I heard him the first time, but I pretended that I didn't hear him. In the end I turned and looked straight into his eyes and asked him what does he want (I was really annoyed that he called me by my real name) of course he had an amused look on his face (probably because he did that on purpose). He asked me to help him on that application. I had to explain him twice 'till he understood. I seriously don't understand why would he ask for my help when before he had no problem with it. At the start of the semester he even offered to help some classmates on solving some applications (and I was one of them) so it doesn't make any sense to me. Anyway, I kid you not, he thanked me for it about 3 times. First it was when I finished explaining him and one minute after that, he thanked me again. At the end of the class, we all had to hand in our projects to the teacher. When I was about to put my project on the table, right in that moment, he was in front of me and he put his hands on my project. I freaked out a bit, because his hands were very close to mine. He AGAIN looked at me and said "thanks". I haven't even had the guts to look into his eyes this time. I just said to him "it's alright" and I rushed to the door. So yeah, all I know now is that everything was in my head. He doesn't hate me or something. He probably doesn't talk to someone unless he's got a good reason or something. Link to post Share on other sites
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