karmar Posted February 16, 2005 Share Posted February 16, 2005 Hello-- need soem advice. Im dating this guy who seems to be only be semi- interested. I think it is because I am the one who initiated us going out-- i called him although he did give me his number. WE have been dating for a couple weeks but I am definately getting the feeling that I am the one who is more interested. He knows this and is getting lazy. I want to do whatever I can to change roles and have him be more interested, call me and be scared to take me for granted. He thinks he has me so whipped. What can I do to change this. Any ideas before it g ets to late/. Link to post Share on other sites
broken24 Posted February 16, 2005 Share Posted February 16, 2005 I have always believed if its meant to be it just works out on its own without having to do anything. My advice on this would be to play it cool, if you called him last then wait for him to call you no matter how much you want to call! This goes for all communication e.g. text, email etc If he likes you he will get in touch and stay in touch... just don't rush in, take your time Link to post Share on other sites
meejessica Posted February 16, 2005 Share Posted February 16, 2005 [color=indigo]Be honest w/ him, tell him how you feel. Also think about the whole picture, and break it off before he does! If he doesn't really want you and you can feel it then try asking yourself, "do I want to be used or look stupid?"[/color] Link to post Share on other sites
medmmg Posted February 16, 2005 Share Posted February 16, 2005 I think broken24 is right...but waiting is SO hard. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 16, 2005 Share Posted February 16, 2005 Originally posted by karmar I want to do whatever I can to change roles and have him be more interested, call me and be scared to take me for granted. You have no control over this. If he is only minimally interested, nothing you do will change that. He has no motivation to change, because he doesn't really have to. You are doing all the work. The only thing you can do is take a gamble - hope that he is more interested in you than he lets on, and then make him do some work for a change. You can do this one of two ways: 1. The 'game method' - everything he does, double it and turn it back on him. Treat him exactly as he is treating you: and then some. If he isn't calling, is always late or doesn't seem to care really - then just be the exact same way to him. Play very hard to get. If he says "I'm busy" then you make yourself busy too, and cancel the next date at the last minute because you are "busy". And so on. I think I read about this method in Cosmo some time back. You dish out what he's serving, and dish out twice as much. According to them, apparently its supposed to work (?!) because of the "men love the chase/challenge" idea. I'd only go this route if playing games appeals to you and you are assertive enough to make it believably work. I don't know if it works personally because my method is pretty much always the next one: 2. The 'no BS method' - call him, tell him that you aren't interested in being with a man who isn't interested in being with you, thank him for all the great times, and say your goodbyes (and mean it). End of conversation. Be aware though, that if he isn't all that interested to begin with pretty much nothing you do is going to "work" in your favor. If he isn't interested, he isn't. He may just be with you because you are available to him. Link to post Share on other sites
karlym3 Posted February 17, 2005 Share Posted February 17, 2005 LucreziaBorgia--- Thanks for the awesome advice. Im going to try it out and see what happens. What excuse do I have for breaking a date at the last minute?? I think playing hard to get works because it sure is workign for me..... he has got me hooked!! Link to post Share on other sites
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