Keke1 Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 To be on the same page about intimacy is important. Just as being on the same page about money, or kids, is important. If it makes you miserable now, it will get worse in 5 years, or 10 years down the line, as you will probably have even less sex. If you can see yourself living like that, then it's all good. However, if the thought of it makes you want to run, then break it off. Exactly this. Leave get the hurt out of the way earlier than later. This will not correct itself. Maybe she is losing interest or does not like having sex with you any longer. When it becomes a chore to try to have sex constantly get out. Hopefully before kids or marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
Keke1 Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 Hi OP. I can totally relate to your post from both sides. My ex bf would always initiate and ask me to initiate sometimes. I really wanted to have sex with him, but I was too insecure to initiate. Not because I thought he would reject me, but because if i try, i feel like ihave to live up some porn star seductress in the way I do it. Also, not quite sure HOW to start it lol. If she is rubbing on you etc, trust me, that is a girl trying!! Its a big thing for us!! Encourage her, tell her how much that turns you on, and tell her other things that she can do to initiate and keep the momentum going. On the other side of things, current boyfriend absolutely refuses to have sex with me. We have only been together just over a month, but damn, the only thing he does is cuddle me or give me a quick peck like once a day. I feel your pain, its really hard when the other person doesnt show the same level of interest as you. Maybe she has lower drive, or medical problems or whatever. I'm sure you ahve tried to talk to her, like i ahve with my guy, and its yielded the same results - temporarily 'trying' but then it goes back to normal. Seriously i think partners who dont give it up are selfish idiots. If they really loved you, they would at least get you off, or pretend to be horny. I mean, guys pretend they like clothes shopping, girls cook for their guys - we all do **** for our partner that we dont necessarily feel like doing. Why should sex be different. Everything you wrote was cool to me except the pretending part. That definitely is not a good thing. Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 Less than two weeks ago, you posted about still being in love with your ex. I think it's time to let this current gf go, given your thoughts are everywhere but with her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SmartDude Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Your in what I like to call the "sexual cycle of doom". 1)You get all bent out of shape because your do not get sex as often as you would like. 2)Your constant nagging about not getting sex makes your partner feel intimidated, hurt, and now she REALLY does not feel like having sex. 3)Go back to step #1 and repeat until it finally blows up in a huge fight. Bro their aint nothing you can do to get her in the mood sexually. The key to getting sex now is keeping your clothes on and pay attention to her mind and heart....That will make her feel sexy again. Link to post Share on other sites
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