Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 The sad part is that it was all so unnecessary. When I made my post last night about poop hitting the fan, I already knew. He thinks he controls her phone with the keylogger. When I rooted her phone I controlled his control from my phone. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Sub Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 There's a much simpler life for you after all of this, Realist. One without concern for key loggers, security cameras, rooted phones, and how well parking garages block gps signals. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 Interesting. Do you think she's consciously or even subconsciously trying to get busted so she's forced to get out of her M? Wasn't it last year when she suggested actually leaving your spouses & being together? what's her general attitude about all of this? It doesn't sound like panicked M damage control...? I know this was not her intent this time. She was just in panic mode. After she told me that he had taken her devices, I literally sat there slack-jawed for 10 seconds, and then told her what she just did. And she started to cry. Monday I might get a better read on this as that is when my daughter does to her cheer camp. There certainly isn't going to be any communication between now and then. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 So no I am in total mode to save her butt. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
tornapart2002 Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 The sad part is that it was all so unnecessary. When I made my post last night about poop hitting the fan, I already knew. He thinks he controls her phone with the keylogger. When I rooted her phone I controlled his control from my phone. You controlled her phone at some point? Not accusatory..honestly interested. This all sounds so high tech and crazy... I think I'm just naive. Is this really real? Again, not trying to be smart this time. Really! Link to post Share on other sites
whatatangledweb Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Realist, don't you think you should inform your wife? If the crap is going to hit the fan, at least she can prepare for it. Your OW sounds like she is panicking which is how my husband was caught. She also seems to want to be caught so she can be with you. BTW, how long have each of you been married? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 You controlled her phone at some point? Not accusatory..honestly interested. This all sounds so high tech and crazy... I think I'm just naive. Is this really real? Again, not trying to be smart this time. Really! Yes, it is real. Rooting a phone gives you ultimate administrative access. It is the same with a laptop or PC. Today's smartphones are computers, make no mistake. When I rooted her phone I have complete administrative access beyond what the actual/typical user has. Her husband put on a keylogger app. This app allowed him to not only see almost everything she typed on certain apps(messaging) as well as a bunch of other location things. All of this is stealth on his part. She would not know he was monitoring her. It would not even show up on her phone. In reality, he has complete access to her phone. But it is not really complete access. if you root the phone you are the administrator. As the administrator I can stop an action(i.e. app) or delete an app. remotely. Last night I was on her phone. I could instantly tell he was accessing it through his keylogger app. I could she was not on, but he was accessing the phone through the app. I blocked access to it three times, and it kept coming back. Then I deleted the app altogether. Within 5 minutes it was re-installed. I'm sure he was scratching his head a little bit. Then I left him alone and waste time looking for nothing. Link to post Share on other sites
Hope Shimmers Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Either your OW wants to get caught or it seems like she isn't very bright (at least at that moment). This is all so much drama. I wonder if the drama is part of what makes this so appealing somehow. Why does there have to be so much drama? Why not just leave these spouses and be together? Because then it would be boring? Honest questions - just my thoughts after reading this thread. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 Realist, don't you think you should inform your wife? If the crap is going to hit the fan, at least she can prepare for it. Your OW sounds like she is panicking which is how my husband was caught. She also seems to want to be caught so she can be with you. BTW, how long have each of you been married? We have both been married 20 years. What is kinda sorta interesting is that our weddings happened within 7 days of each other in the same city. Way back when in 1994. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 There's a much simpler life for you after all of this, Realist. One without concern for key loggers, security cameras, rooted phones, and how well parking garages block gps signals. I hate to say this. I can't say it. Link to post Share on other sites
tornapart2002 Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 I guess I wondered because shortly after my H's affair some weird things were happening to his phone. One of them was messages appearing on our bill that he swears up and down he never received. Could he have been lying at the time? Absolutely...but he went as far as calling the wireless provider in front of me and asking them what was going on. THe numbers were from the H and mother of the FOW we learned later. The H is pretty tech savy and I sometimes wonder what he could have done if my H had been stupid enough (which I'm sure he was) to leave that phone somewhere where the FOW or the H could have gotten it. Anyhow, who knows....things were pretty messed up in the beginning of discovery for us and got pretty confusing so who knows what was going on and if H was just trying to end things and never told me that part. I know a lot more now than I did to keep track of him, but, yet, he's given me little reason at this point to worry about it. Good luck with all of this...I'd be a basketcase and absolutely exhausted having to be on my toes all the time. It's probably why, among morals, I could never have an affair. Yes, it is real. Rooting a phone gives you ultimate administrative access. It is the same with a laptop or PC. Today's smartphones are computers, make no mistake. When I rooted her phone I have complete administrative access beyond what the actual/typical user has. Her husband put on a keylogger app. This app allowed him to not only see almost everything she typed on certain apps(messaging) as well as a bunch of other location things. All of this is stealth on his part. She would not know he was monitoring her. It would not even show up on her phone. In reality, he has complete access to her phone. But it is not really complete access. if you root the phone you are the administrator. As the administrator I can stop an action(i.e. app) or delete an app. remotely. Last night I was on her phone. I could instantly tell he was accessing it through his keylogger app. I could she was not on, but he was accessing the phone through the app. I blocked access to it three times, and it kept coming back. Then I deleted the app altogether. Within 5 minutes it was re-installed. I'm sure he was scratching his head a little bit. Then I left him alone and waste time looking for nothing. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Last night I was on her phone. I could instantly tell he was accessing it through his keylogger app. I could she was not on, but he was accessing the phone through the app. I blocked access to it three times, and it kept coming back. Then I deleted the app altogether. Within 5 minutes it was re-installed. I'm sure he was scratching his head a little bit. Then I left him alone and waste time looking for nothing. This level of interference in someone else's relationship is morally bankrupt. And if you were to look at it selfishly from only your POV, what a sad and pathetic use of your time and focus of your emotional energy. You seem like a bright guy. Even you'd have to agree you deserve a more purposeful life than this. Is this really where you want to be :confused: ??? Mr. Lucky 5 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 The sad part is that it was all so unnecessary. When I made my post last night about poop hitting the fan, I already knew. He thinks he controls her phone with the keylogger. When I rooted her phone I controlled his control from my phone. The lengths you two have gone to cover and hide the affair from her husband is unbelievable. For all you know he's hired a PI. Anyway, now something is going to happen either way. Just hope she is 'woman' enough to finally come clean and admit it. It's time just to tell all and let the chips fall where they may. Your situation sounds so exhausting and the real drama is yet to come. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 So no I am in total mode to save her butt. She is a grown woman and an adult who decided to go along this path way. Maybe it's time she faced the music. Stop protecting her and trying to control what happens next. It's just wrong and as much as you may hate and disrespect her husband, again, the lengths you've gone to hide the A from him is like a Hollywood movie. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 This level of interference in someone else's relationship is morally bankrupt. And if you were to look at it selfishly from only your POV, what a sad and pathetic use of your time and focus of your emotional energy. You seem like a bright guy. Even you'd have to agree you deserve a more purposeful life than this. Is this really where you want to be :confused: ??? Mr. Lucky That is a good question. I decided no. But realize that I am not just looking out for me right now. I have nothing to lose. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 The lengths you two have gone to cover and hide the affair from her husband is unbelievable. For all you know he's hired a PI. Anyway, now something is going to happen either way. Just hope she is 'woman' enough to finally come clean and admit it. It's time just to tell all and let the chips fall where they may. Your situation sounds so exhausting and the real drama is yet to come. I will respond later. I'm still in a state of disbelief. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Realist3 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 After all of this time. After all of this effort. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 I will respond later. I'm still in a state of disbelief. You're disappointed and feel let down (I assume) but did you do all this on your own (to protect her) or did she ask you to do all this for her? Her actions show that she wants to be caught. She isn't stupid. Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 I'm not surprised. You've been convinced this whole time that you had this 'under wraps', and that your plan, your methods, were foolproof. You negated the one thing I'd warned you about...the human factor. You can be as careful as you like...but inevitably, someone screws up. They get careless...don't follow protocol because they've never had a close call. And here you are. Why stress about her side of things? It's ALL on her at this point to work things out. She's where she's chosen to be...there because of her own choices and actions. Let her be a big girl and deal with the consequences. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 But realize that I am not just looking out for me right now. I'm assuming by this you mean you're looking out for her also. Hoping you're cognizant of the fact that others besides the two of you have a significant stake in the outcome also... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
whatatangledweb Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 After all of this time. After all of this effort. It normally is just one small slip that gives it all away. That slip wakes up all the red flags we had ignored before and we find out. I know you thought it was impossible but as humans we slip at things sooner or later. I'm sorry you are hurting. Link to post Share on other sites
veryhappy Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 After all of this time. After all of this effort. Quite frankly, it was sheer luck that nobody in your real life read your posts here. You've given so many details that if most are true, it would be way too easy for somebody who knows you to recognize who you are. It's not just her who's been reckless. I would hazard a guess that the longer you continue an A, the more you increase the chances of being discovered. Now it's done and you'll have to face the music. Haven't answered the kids and being together questions? What's really in the way? Your marriages sound mere formality, kids are leaving home finishing high-school. Why not be together and end all this (hate to use the word for personal history reasons) non-sense? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Hope Shimmers Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 Quite frankly, it was sheer luck that nobody in your real life read your posts here. You've given so many details that if most are true, it would be way too easy for somebody who knows you to recognize who you are. It's not just her who's been reckless. I would hazard a guess that the longer you continue an A, the more you increase the chances of being discovered. Now it's done and you'll have to face the music. Haven't answered the kids and being together questions? What's really in the way? Your marriages sound mere formality, kids are leaving home finishing high-school. Why not be together and end all this (hate to use the word for personal history reasons) non-sense? Totally agree... and have thought the same about the amount of details given. Seems very strange for an attorney. Even if marital assets/finances are an issue to getting divorced, it seems like now might be the time for her to work through those legally. If she knows he is hiding assets then that can be investigated. Why stay in miserable marriages? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Hope Shimmers Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 I suspect there are no worries about that. Agree. (ten characters) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 So no I am in total mode to save her butt. Her butt isn't yours to save. That's where you are tangled up. Seriously, think about what you typed. Do you like the rescue mode? Link to post Share on other sites
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