mohhoss213 Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 I have never been in a relationship before, so I'm posting just looking for some advice and perspective. My Asperger's has been characterized by my limited ability to express and understand my emotions. So if I enter into a relationship, should I look for someone who doesn't place reassurance or affection highly on their expectations? Or is it still possible to have a relationship with someone who places importance on affection knowing I come from the opposite side of the spectrum? I don't want my future partner to interpret me keeping to myself as a sign of neglect and not wanting to emotionally connect. Sometimes, I need more alone time than normal to re-energize and clear my head to feel better. In an argument, I like to get to the root of the problems first before I can resolve feelings because it just takes me more time than normal to understand and process my emotions. How do I make a woman see that it's not a reflection of her, it's just my brain pathways acting different from most others? Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet Storm Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 People have different love languages, which means people have different ways they express and feel love. Examples of love languages in a book by Dr. Gary Chapman are Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Gifts, Physical Affection, Quality Time. So if you are with a girl that feels loved by hugs, kisses and hearing how much you love her, she will be able to intellectually understand that you are limited because of Asperger's, but she may still feel something missing because her needs arent being met. You can warm up her car, carry the groceries, and buy her presents, but if that's not what she truly desires, she may not feel emotionally connected. So you should find a girl who feels loved in the ways that you are able to express it. Reading the book "The Five Love Languages" my help you learn how to identify the needs of others, and help you learn to express your love in ways that may not feel natural to you. It also will give you ideas about what you can do to show love. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts