jayy23 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 So in short I started a relationship with a girl I met on pof. We had been talking for a few months then eventually decided to meet we hung out for a while until I got to the point of asking her out (she said yes) we have been together for just over a month now but Im starting to think somthing is up. When we started the relationship we both deleted our accounts on pof but just the other day I decided to download the app and have a look to make sure she did delete hers. Turns out she didn't. She was even online at the time I checked and she has recent pictures of herself up. It says she is single and she has put her instagram name on it saying.. follow me. I know that she talks to other guys but when I have asked about them she just tells me they are friends but it's not just a few and she has never even met most of them. All these guys are after one thing and half of them she started talking to from pof so why would she still want to talk to them when she has me? She also refuses to change her fb status to in a relationship and won't put any pictures of us together on her instagram. I'm thinking that she doesn't want these guys to know she has a bf for some reason. Am not sure what to do.
CarrieT Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Am not sure what to do. Break up with her. She has proven that she is not committed and still wants to play the field. 6
Elle1975 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 So in short I started a relationship with a girl I met on pof. We had been talking for a few months then eventually decided to meet we hung out for a while until I got to the point of asking her out (she said yes) we have been together for just over a month now but Im starting to think somthing is up. When we started the relationship we both deleted our accounts on pof but just the other day I decided to download the app and have a look to make sure she did delete hers. Turns out she didn't. She was even online at the time I checked and she has recent pictures of herself up. It says she is single and she has put her instagram name on it saying.. follow me. I know that she talks to other guys but when I have asked about them she just tells me they are friends but it's not just a few and she has never even met most of them. All these guys are after one thing and half of them she started talking to from pof so why would she still want to talk to them when she has me? She also refuses to change her fb status to in a relationship and won't put any pictures of us together on her instagram. I'm thinking that she doesn't want these guys to know she has a bf for some reason. Am not sure what to do. The old "action speaks louder than words" applies in your situation. Oh btw, did you guys have the "let's be exclusive talk" before you took down the profiles?
Author jayy23 Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 The old "action speaks louder than words" applies in your situation. Oh btw, did you guys have the "let's be exclusive talk" before you took down the profiles? Yeh we did. She even took a screen shot of her deleting her account and sent me it so that I knew she did delete it so she has obviously made a new one since. She has said to me that she has told her brother and friends about me but hasn't told her parents but will soon? It's wierd cause sometimes she will come out with random things like what would you do if I had another bf would you tell him about us.. and I'm just like a don't even know what to think about that like why would you even say something like that?
smackie9 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Dude seriously, you don't need us to tell you what to do......ok I will tell you DUMP HER ASS. 2
HappyLove Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Seems most people online are crazy and unfaithful. No idea why good people continue to OLD. 1
CarrieT Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 No idea why good people continue to OLD. Some of us have actually found spouses via OLD (as in: RECENTLY = I was married last November). 4
aprilisi Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 She sounds like trouble. Probably just looking for attention and compliments but it can lead into more. My friend's BF still has up his POF profile. She says he just has it up for fun. But he's on there every day. And he's a known cheater. But she just won't open her eyes.
HappyLove Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Some of us have actually found spouses via OLD (as in: RECENTLY = I was married last November). Yes, lucky you but it's VERY rare. Most OLDing experiences are nightmares! Don't believe me just peruse the boards!
HappyLove Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 She sounds like trouble. Probably just looking for attention and compliments but it can lead into more. My friend's BF still has up his POF profile. She says he just has it up for fun. But he's on there every day. And he's a known cheater. But she just won't open her eyes. She knows! Unfortunately a lot of people think a little bit of something is better than nothing. No matter how horrible, they'll put up with it because it's better than be alone, in their eyes. Just be there for her later on. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 You really don't know what to do? You get rid of her. She's obviously not serious about you and doesn't really consider herself your girlfriend. She is looking for other men, OP. What more do you need to know?
smackie9 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 ......OLD? People have gotten far too lazy and stopped going out and having a life. If people detached from their devices they would see what's around them.... 2
CarrieT Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 ......OLD? People have gotten far too lazy and stopped going out and having a life. If people detached from their devices they would see what's around them.... That is awfully judgmental, don't you think? In my case, I was/am a middle-aged successful writer and artist who simply had dated every potential single man withinin my social circle. For the man I ultimately met, dated, and married via OLD, he was/is also a a successful surgeon but by attending museum openings, concerts, and lectures had failed to meet anyone with the same interests and sensibilities (and kink!) as me. Neither of us were lazy and neither of us stopped having a life. And now our life is that much more fulfilled by having met via OLD. 4
truth_seeker Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 If you have feelings for her, leave her now. If you are comfortable just having sex with her, and don't feelings for her, then continue. I would definitely look to date a more stable person. She doesn't respect you, that's for sure.
babycakees Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Here's the thing. You already didn't trust her because you downloaded the app and resigned in to see if she lied, with good reason apparently. Now you know she lied to you. The trust is gone. Dump her and move on. You don't have to tell her you know she's still on POF. You can just say things aren't working out.
Author jayy23 Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 So a just said to her about it and she got all defensive said she doesn't have pof when she clearly does. And of all things to do she's actually just blocked me on fb with her last msg being (*** this)
smackie9 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 That is awfully judgmental, don't you think? In my case, I was/am a middle-aged successful writer and artist who simply had dated every potential single man withinin my social circle. For the man I ultimately met, dated, and married via OLD, he was/is also a a successful surgeon but by attending museum openings, concerts, and lectures had failed to meet anyone with the same interests and sensibilities (and kink!) as me. Neither of us were lazy and neither of us stopped having a life. And now our life is that much more fulfilled by having met via OLD. The majority that use OLD are not intellectually strong like you or your husband. 98% out there is garbage, predators, liars, cheater and crazies. People have become emotionally detached from the real world, you should know this. People have anxiety attacks if they don't have their smart phone in their hand checking FB. It's a sorry sight when you have people of all ages coming here ask us if this guy or girl likes them and what should they do......it's bloody pathetic. A lot of people don't know how to socially interact with others IN PERSON. They hide behind text, posting on social media. If we had a solar flair knocking out all sources of communicators, like satellites all hell would break loose.
HappyLove Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 So a just said to her about it and she got all defensive said she doesn't have pof when she clearly does. And of all things to do she's actually just blocked me on fb with her last msg being (*** this) What innocent person would go to that extreme? Move on OP. 3
Author jayy23 Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 Just sent me a msg over instagram saying that I'm an idiot she's not a lier and I've to delete her from that aswell.
babycakees Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 She's mad she got caught in a lie. Better you find out now than later down the road. She's not worth the frustration. 5
2sunny Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Yeh we did. She even took a screen shot of her deleting her account and sent me it so that I knew she did delete it so she has obviously made a new one since. She has said to me that she has told her brother and friends about me but hasn't told her parents but will soon? It's wierd cause sometimes she will come out with random things like what would you do if I had another bf would you tell him about us.. and I'm just like a don't even know what to think about that like why would you even say something like that? She would say something like that because she's a jerk. What she's doing by being on pof is making it clear that she's available to other men. If that doesn't work for you then get rid of her.
Dallers Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Get rid mate. There is no rule here it is just principle. I met a girl a week ago on POF secured a date with her today and so I delete the app. It is not because I have no intention of going back to POF but for now I have someone who I am interested in and want it to work as I like her. The amount of people you go through to find that one good person there is no rush to go back. She is clearly seeking attention from multiple guys not just you, if she really liked only you she would not bother logging in. Next her and stop beating yourself up she is not worth it. 2
2sunny Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 So a just said to her about it and she got all defensive said she doesn't have pof when she clearly does. And of all things to do she's actually just blocked me on fb with her last msg being (*** this) Good! She's a liar and a cheat who will never admit she causes harm to her relationships. Better off without her!
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