dcgirl Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 the short version: we dated for two months, were never intimate (but about to get there), and things kinda faded as we wanted different things. we're friends now...talking and emailing often, hanging out just as we did when we dated. but i'm still interested in him. and i've changed my position with regard to our difference of opinion. we make silly cd mixes for each other. the last one he gave me had four love-ish songs on it. i didn't ask him if it meant anything but talked about the songs often in our last conversation. since then, we've begun this flirting thing, where we "joke" about how hot the other is. there appears to be an unspoken "don't ask, don't tell" rule when it comes to whether we're seeing people. i can hang out with him with relative ease even though i want more from our friendship. but when we are together, all i keep thinking is, "hello...why did we stop dating?" i want to feel him out to see if he'd be interested in dating me again. how do i do that without weirding him out (that is, if he's not interested trying again)? maybe the next time we hang out, i could start by being flirty or jokey then transition into "the talk." any tips would be great Link to post Share on other sites
tegteg Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 Well from a guys point of view... I say yes he is interested. BUT to what extent i can not say. Only time will tell that.... If you want a tip, be straight up with guys, were pretty simple for the most part... BUT If you want to feel him out, U 2 go out, moive, dinner, whatever and pay attention. Try wrapping your arm around his while walking, be more open and by open i mean flirty... If hes interested he should end up giving you some sort of sign... Every guy is diff. as for me, you flirt with me ill be more touchy feely.. I.E. Grab your hand, touch your shoulders, rub your neck, play with your hair, say certin things like WOW you look wonderfully Awesome (yes i have said that) Misc things you know.... Theres really no one way to tell, in the end its all up to you and i belive if i feel it is there, ill say come closer and lean over and give a nice lil warm kiss, BUT you have to pay attention. If he pulls back, then your OUT. If not then you have a foot in the door.... Im in a simalar situation myself... check out my thread. -*Ladies advice needed... Ex came back into my life For what its worth i do hope it works out for you, as for me in a simalar sit. i shall see.... Good Luck.... Teggy Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 For your 'friend' the 'friend zone' is where he is most comfortable with you. He gets to have all the benefits of your company, without any of the entanglement of an actual relationship. I expect he missed you, not the relationship and is now enjoying what he does have with you. The problem is that it isn't working for you. He isn't going to change his mind, because he is getting all he needs and wants from this arrangement. There's very little chance he's going to go back to a relationship he got himself out of when he's getting the best of it out of "just friends". Only one person can make the change and that has to be you. Right now, he probably thinks you are OK with this arrangement or else you wouldn't be there. So, all you can do is stay as 'friends' or distance yourself to get your heart back together. Be honest with him. Let him know that your interests are in getting back together, not being 'just friends'. You'll have to be sure that you are ready to do that. Sometimes standing up for what you want can result in losing what little you have. You just have to be willing not to compromise your heart. Link to post Share on other sites
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