elseaacych Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 One of my facebook friends posted this article, and I thought it was kind of interesting, but I disagree with it in that I don't think the writer of this article has mastered the art of buying a girl a drink. The Bachelor Guy The 3 Reasons You Should Never Buy a Woman a Drink » The Bachelor Guy This article makes me wonder if there is some unspoken etiquette for accepting free drinks, or if this guy is just coming off as though he thinks he's entitled to much more than a thank you and a few minutes of conversation (at the very least) for buying a woman a drink. As a single woman, I would be flattered if a guy bought me a drink, although, if he was a total stranger who just approached, drink in hand, I would be much more skeptical than if he was a guy that I met at a bar, really hit it off with and chatted with for a few minutes, before he casually asked: "Hey, could I buy you a drink?" So, ladies: what's your take on free drinks? Gentlemen, what if a random girl tried to pick you up with a free drink? Link to post Share on other sites
RyanBeynolds Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I can't speak on a random girl, but I would say that would definitely be unordinary, as you all probably would agree. I definitely would stick around and get to know her, though. But like most guys say... "I'm not like other guys" I have been joking around and asked a random girl I was talking to for a sip of her drink, though. Sometimes I even score their whole drink to finish! Go ahead, call me moocher. And one time, I think one had a roofie in it But I went to the bar with some friends, and I guess this girl wanted to stay and have fun or liked one of my friends or me. I was not attracted to her in the least bit... but I am called the "life of the party" and we were just having a great time. I actually liked her friend, and was hoping to see her later that night. Well....... this girl with us kept on buying me drink after drink after drink. Needless to say, it's hard for me to say no to FREE DRINKS!!! So I threw up and didn't get to see her friend Link to post Share on other sites
MoreCoffee Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I would be tickled if a gal was buying and would be appreciative. If I buy a gal a drink, I expect nothing/ask nothing/don't follow up because you get into trouble having expectations. Link to post Share on other sites
RyanBeynolds Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I have never bought a girl a drink besides my girlfriend. Not because I'm a cheapskate college student (main reason) but back when I was on the hunt, I just didn't find this as a good or efficient way of picking up/meeting women. Link to post Share on other sites
WhiskeyJack Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 Interesting article. Although I don't agree with everything, but then again what do I know I tend to stay away from bars haha. Personally I'm all for a free drink, I'm never expecting it though. And really I've only had 1 drink bought for me and it was one hell of an ego boost haha. Link to post Share on other sites
FitnessRN Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I almost never buy girls drinks who are strangers. I only buy them for girls im fiends with and have known for years (not at bars). Usually the girls at bars who are strangers buy me drinks. I've seen girls buy more strangers drinks trying to get them interested the last few years. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I think it's a nice ice breaker. I will always chat with a man who buys me a drink & I will often get the next round, more because I don't want to be beholden. My husband always hated that custom. He thinks women use the idea of men buying them drinks as a way to sucker hard working men out of their money. Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I think it's a nice gesture when you are already talking to the guy and he notices your drink is empty, so offers to buy you another one. At least that way you already know you don't mind talking to him. I've had guys send me drinks from the other side of the bar. It can be awkward, because he has already bought the drink, so I felt obligated to take it, even if I didn't feel like talking to him. And then, of course, I had to talk to him because he just bought me a drink. Sometimes, it's fine, though, and I end up having a nice conversation with the guy. I can't stand it when guys buy shots without asking first. I don't do shots, so those I always turn down. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 If I'm not going to get anything out of it whatsoever, why would I want to buy a girl a drink? I might as well just give that money to the guy outside the grocery store. At least he'd hopefully use it to eat. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 If I'm not going to get anything out of it whatsoever, why would I want to buy a girl a drink? First it is an ice breaker. You may get conversation out of it. You may also get a phone #. She may buy you a drink. It's not a quid pro quo thing. What are you going to "get out of it" if you pick up the check on a date? How is that different? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I wouldn't buy a girl I didn't know a drink because there is nothing stopping her from taking her drink and bailing. The stories of girls going out without taking money or debit cards brcsaue the guys at the bar provide all their drinks for them are too common for me to go that route. Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I think I am pretty good at reading women at bars. I don't believe every woman is out to get something for nothing from me. If I see a girl that I deem worth my time (based on a lot of things I am not going to get into), I have no problem buying her a drink as a gesture. Party girls that try to play guys for free ****? Will likely get their head bitten off by me. They should be careful. I will treat them like trash and make them have a bad night. I have no problem being rude to them. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 First it is an ice breaker. You may get conversation out of it. You may also get a phone #. She may buy you a drink. It's not a quid pro quo thing. Eh, that's a lot of maybe's. I'd say that I have just a good of a chance at a conversation or getting a phone # even if I didn't buy her a drink. What are you going to "get out of it" if you pick up the check on a date? How is that different? Honestly, I don't like to pay for early dates for the exact same reason. I believe in equivalent exchange. If I'm buying her food and stuff, then I'm getting something from her in return. That usually only kicks in when a relationship is already established. In the early dating stages, I'd prefer to go dutch or alternate paying. Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 First it is an ice breaker. You may get conversation out of it. You may also get a phone #. She may buy you a drink. It's not a quid pro quo thing. What are you going to "get out of it" if you pick up the check on a date? How is that different? Buying a girl a drink is not gonna make her like you more. She either likes you or doesn't like you. It make no difference if you don't buy her a drink. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 Good grief...do guys really read this nonsense. Stop being a boy and start being a confident man. Stop the immature navel gazing and buy a woman a drink if you want to. Do you really think if a guy buys a girl a drink, she'll like him more? I don't think it scores any points, at least not enough to make a difference. Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 For now on if I get that urge, I'll offer them a drink, but they have to drink whatever I'm drinking. Moose drool! yeah! Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 Buying a girl a drink is not gonna make her like you more. She either likes you or doesn't like you. It make no difference if you don't buy her a drink. I never said it did. I said it's an ice breaker. It may make it easier for her to talk to you. At a minimum she has to say thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 Buying a girl a drink is not gonna make her like you more. She either likes you or doesn't like you. It make no difference if you don't buy her a drink. Do you really think if a guy buys a girl a drink, she'll like him more? I don't think it scores any points, at least not enough to make a difference. I agree, if she doesn't want you, buying her a drink is not going to make her want you. Like wise, not buying a drink is of little consequence in most cases too. But you're wrong in your thought process. You made a whole thread (one of the "Jay###'s did anyway) about how women show interest to indicate she wants you to approach....so I'd think you'd have a good idea what girl is worth your time. I am not buying drinks left and right to a bunch of women, but a $7 to $20 drink for a girl I got my eye on and am reasonably certain is open to me advancing on her is nothing. A lot of times, I go up to them and talk with them first and then buy a drink for them. I don't really care about equal rights. That is something for other people to argue about. I am not saying women are the weaker sex and needs a man to take care of them. But when I go up on a girl, I take care of things and buying her a drink sets that tone. It's an underlaying tone. You can't really point a finger at it and say yes or no. I do a bunch of stuff like that and most of it doesn't take $$$. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I agree, if she doesn't want you, buying her a drink is not going to make her want you. Like wise, not buying a drink is of little consequence in most cases too. But you're wrong in your thought process. You made a whole thread (one of the "Jay###'s did anyway) about how women show interest to indicate she wants you to approach....so I'd think you'd have a good idea what girl is worth your time. I am not buying drinks left and right to a bunch of women, but a $7 to $20 drink for a girl I got my eye on and am reasonably certain is open to me advancing on her is nothing. A lot of times, I go up to them and talk with them first and then buy a drink for them. I don't really care about equal rights. That is something for other people to argue about. I am not saying women are the weaker sex and needs a man to take care of them. But when I go up on a girl, I take care of things and buying her a drink sets that tone. It's an underlaying tone. You can't really point a finger at it and say yes or no. I do a bunch of stuff like that and most of it doesn't take $$$. First you agree with me, then you start talking about the thread I made about when girls show interest, then about equal rights and.......WTH are you talking about? Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 (edited) A guy bought me and my friends a drink once. The rest of the pack turned their backs, but half of them had BFs and the other half was only interested in the alcohol because they were too young to buy whisky on their own. I had my first kiss with him after half an hour of dancing. But I knew at the very start that this wasn't going to be something that could turn into a relationship, not much conversing either because that guy was just too drunk. I guess he would have loved a ONS too, but that honor goes to 'BF the First'. About the article, #1 is correct. I would be very careful, and wouldn't even take it if he wouldn't buy it in my presence (could be drugged...). #3 and #2 depend on the guy. If you're drunk like "mine" was, or if you meet people who aren't interested in the first place but into the drinks, then your attempt will fail. Edited July 15, 2014 by No Limit 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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