Disillusioned Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 That's the analogy I came up with to describe how I feel as an openly asexual single man looking for love in a sea of others' feelings about sexuality. I've tried to understand what makes sex-seeking men tick... my best guess is that to them, dating is a journey and sex is a destination, an endorphin/pleasure hit. Now I can understand why some men wonder "so what's your point?" when they're aware of my looking for love without sex. For me, the dynamics are a little different, that's all. Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Can you clarify what you mean by asexual? Does it mean that you've never had sex, or you have and you don't enjoy it? Would you be with someone who did want to have sex? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
EngnimaticResponse Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 I have known others like him. It means he does not feel sexually attracted to women or men. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 There's quite a wide spectrum between being asexual and being 'a sex-seeking man with sex being the sole goal'. I'd wager most men in happy/healthy/loving LTRs lie somewhere in the middle. That being said, there is actually an asexual community out there, with both men and women. You could try looking there, but you still need to have SOMEthing that attracts them to you. Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 There's quite a wide spectrum between being asexual and being 'a sex-seeking man with sex being the sole goal'. I'd wager most men in happy/healthy/loving LTRs lie somewhere in the middle. That being said, there is actually an asexual community out there, with both men and women. You could try looking there, but you still need to have SOMEthing that attracts them to you. Just when I thought that only 3 sex types existed...a 4th one creeps in. lol. I remember hearing the word "Asexual" in biology class, but it ONLY applied to how snails or bacteria reproduce....NEVER in regards to how humans reproduce. Starting to think some of these orientations are even legit. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Disillusioned Posted July 20, 2014 Author Share Posted July 20, 2014 Can you clarify what you mean by asexual? Does it mean that you've never had sex, or you have and you don't enjoy it? I'm attracted to women, but I've never felt the urge to have sex. It isn't a question of "the right ones", it's just the way I'm wired. To many people, this is inconceivable. Would you be with someone who did want to have sex? Probably not, because that would cause problems... she'd either need to get sex toys, or cheat. BTW Elswyth is right... asexuality dot org is something like 50,000 people now. Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 Do you even jerk off at all? I was super fat in high school and never did or had the urge to. Later on when I lost weight I ended up getting so turned on by something I read on a message board that I just ejaculated a little in my pants with no real rubbing or anything. That kind of woke me up and I started masturbating and eventually dating. I might still be celibate and wondering if I was asexual if I never lost the weight. You never really know for sure what might be laying dormant inside you. Link to post Share on other sites
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