never seem to have any luck, bit of back up and would be sweet

[quidproquo89]

Hey, so I don't want this to be a soppy moan, but I could do with a little kind encouragement.

 

I don't seem to have any luck with the ladies. I can chat with anybody. However I am quite reserved and very thoughtful.

 

Which means I'm not the sort of guy that finds it easy to walk up to girls and hit on them.

 

Last few girls I've 'been involved' with - I've been rejected for different reasons - too shy, using me for attention and making her ex jealous, coming on too strong - but she was hot and then cold tbh. And most recently an amazing girl asked me out and after we made out she never contacted me again - which means it was a rebound thing.

 

I learn from each time I get rejected but it is starting to make me feel frustrated and unhappy.

 

I've been single a long time and can't seem to catch a break. I guess the answer is 'when you least expect it and 'stop looking'. But as a guy, I have to make the move as women generally don't do the chasing.

 

So what would you guys n girls say in regards of encouragement/support.

This last time really disappointed me, the last few I got my hopes up too soon, and this last time I didn't. I got asked out, I was chatty and laid back and she wanted me to kiss her. And then to never hear from her again hurts tbh. I would have been fine as friends or just leave me out of her whole getting over her ex. Instead being sucked in by someone you think is amazing and then dropped without a word is rude and cruel.

[Assasda]

Its not as bad as you think.

First of all. People dont want up and hit on women, you walk up and talk to them just like anyone else.

 

You probably seem like a guy thats eager to please, so they get pleased by you then they leave. Dont be that guy, be true to who you are

[todreaminblue]

the easiest practice you can do is when you are out and about.....with a shopping trolley even just start conversation dont worry if they look at you like an alien open a conversation with someone who is standing next to you or in the same aisle as you doesnt matter their age or sex nationality (these are a challenge make someone smile who doesnt speak your language and you have achieved my friend)....just do that more often....when you smile at someone smile as if you know them....the chick behind the checkout.....is a captive audience she has to reply to you.....lol......

 

i find smiling at people as fi you know them makes it easy to start a conversation and i do this to everyone....i am approached often.....probably due to this.....i must look like i know what i am doing or where i am going...because i find lost people and lost items like fountain tomato sauce......and then i have to lead them to someone who really does know where things are.....i havent a clue i just look like i have a clue because i am a pretty confident person...i am just as lost as others are however.....wandering around till i find what i need...picking people up along the way

 

so the more confidence you have when you go out and able to talk and smile like you know someone the easier it will become to strike up random conversations......you will be surprised how many people come up to you just from giving a warm smile, they normally feel open to start the conversation and you go from there........good luck....deb

[spiderowl]

Sorry to hear what's happened. Don't get too demoralised as I understand this is par for the course in dating.

 

Maybe girls are finding that you are too laid back with respect to taking the initiative with them. If they are having to ask you to kiss them, then that suggests you weren't making any obvious moves. While a girl might enjoy kissing you in that situation, she may not want to pursue it if she thinks she's always going to be the one trying to persuade you. If it were me, for example, I'd think he wasn't very attracted to me, or too passive. I must admit, it's attractive when the guy makes the moves, however shyly. Passivity can come across as a kind of laziness sometimes.

[BlueIris]

If you are talking to women and interacting with them naturally, with no agenda or goal other than to get them know them, you are going to win.

 

It is our dissatisfaction with that, wanting more and emotionally attaching too early that hurts.

 

Wait much longer to decide if you want to start a relationship with someone. Keep getting to know her for a good long while before attaching. Stay in the 'undecided' status.

 

About the make-out one night girl: you got a free make-out night. If you thought, "man, that was great making out that night," you'd be happy.

Edited July 21, 2014 by BlueIris