CoolBurn Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 I recently met this guy, he's been texting me for about two weeks now. He texts me everyday, even calls to check on me, but he has a gf. Although he has not suggested anything I have been reminding him that his girl wouldn't be happy if she knew he's texting someone else non stop while they are having a hard time. Although they have been in a rs for only about two months, it is bothering me. When I asked him he said he hasn't been talking to her because they had a falling out and he just feels she isn't 'the one', so they have a hard time understanding eachother. He's said he is breaking it off but wants to do so slowly or sth because he doesn't want to hurt her. As I mentioned he hasn't suggested us getting together or anything but he is a tease. I don't know what to make of this. Do I reply to his texts? I don't really want to confront him since he hasn't made any passes at me it's just that obviously you wouldn't be texting anyone else and show that much interest if you already had your hands full qith another girl. What do I do? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Until he is official free, your best bet is to keep your distance. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CoolBurn Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 Until he is official free, your best bet is to keep your distance. Should I just stop talking to him altogether or do I just keep him at bay and remind him that he does have a gf until it's over between them? Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Even after he is free, he has shown you what type of person he is. If you were to get into a relationship with him, what makes you think he will change? Don't you think that a person who acts like this when he is with someone else, will also act like this when he is with you? Texting and flirting with other girls? Are you OK with that? Do you think this character trait will make him a good boyfriend? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CoolBurn Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 Until he is official free, your best bet is to keep your distance. Even after he is free, he has shown you what type of person he is. If you were to get into a relationship with him, what makes you think he will change? Don't you think that a person who acts like this when he is with someone else, will also act like this when he is with you? Texting and flirting with other girls? Are you OK with that? Do you think this character trait will make him a good boyfriend? I do absolutely agree, but even if I did start a relationship (which I doubt) I do believe this would be one of the first things I'd confront him about. I am aware of the situation but I don't know if this is happening because they truly aren't a match or because he just enjoys keeping other people in his loop? Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Don't lecture him or try to educate him. Do what is best for you. If you like texting with him, continue. If you think that there is a chance for you to get hurt - tell him to call you only when he's totally single. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Do what's best for you. But if you start this remember that a man who cheats with you will eventually cheat on you. Move forward understanding the reality of the situation. Personally I'd put it out there: I like you. You have a GF. I'm not a home-wrecker. If you break up with her because that is what you want to do having nothing to do with me, give me a call. Maybe we can go out if I'm free & not otherwise involved. Until them I'd prefer you not contact me again. Link to post Share on other sites
BeingMe Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 He's shown you who he really is. Believe him. He is someone who looks for female attention when he gets stressed & [fill in excuse here]. You already see this. Why bother going for someone like this who you'd have to have that conversation with? Why not go for someone who doesn't have that issue in the first place? I ignored red flags like this. I've been married for 15 years to my STBXH. It turns out he was cheating for AT LEAST the last 7 of those (and yes,we had all those difficult conversations early on)...and from what others have said, it's likely he was flirty behind my back the whole time. I now know, what I'm going to say to you: You deserve better than someone who flirts with you when they're taken. You deserve someone who is truly available and faithful. Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Even IF he actually leaves his GF, you'll just be his rebound. Is that really who you want to be? As my girl Maya Angelou said "When someone shows you who they are, believe them". I can't tell you how bang on this statement is! Personally, I'd save my dignity and not waste anymore energy on someone who clearly doesn't respect boundaries. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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