FaithInTheDark Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 In this past week I've hooked up with a buddy of mine, he's a good looking guy and we had a buddy buddy relationship. Well the second time of hanging out since out hooking up I was out in the bar with him and I could see what a dog he was to girls but I know I can't get upset if he's pressuring other girls. But than my girlfriend told me he was making the moves on her but I just brushed it off. But he left the bar and text me saying " can you bring so-n so up to my house" (referring to my friend!) Well we all walked back to his house since I left some belongings and I took him aside and told him how extremely rude that was of him to opening ask to bring a girl back to his house for him. He admitted that wasn't cool and said he was sorry. Anyway I brushed it off and ended up staying at his house that night. And I'm a unthought out drunken decision I ended up sleeping with him again. I know deep down I'm so much better than the way be treated me but I just wanted to have sex and it was hard to leave him he's so physically attractive. I've been kinda beating myself up about hooking up with him after what he did but accepted it was just physical and it will not happen again, The thing is I'm close with his sister and they live together . I don't want to be around the guy but were all apart of the same social circle and I don't want to compromise my friendship with his sister . I lost respect for him but yet still slept with him and apart of me is ashamed. My question is how can I cut off contact with him while still maintains friendship with our social circle? Any advice how I can deal with my mess? Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 (edited) Odds are you're going to have sex with him again. But it's OK since he's so hot. Question: Do you actually want to change things? Edited July 26, 2014 by somedude81 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Candy_Pants Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Stop ****ing guys who are obviously using you. Get some self respect. Stay away from this douche bag. If you want to see his sister, fine, but do it away from their house. Avoid him at social gatherings. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author FaithInTheDark Posted July 26, 2014 Author Share Posted July 26, 2014 I definitely won't sleep with this guy again that's forsure. As for the self respect, I get it ... I guess apart of me was using him too. Apart of me knows it was not a smart decision but I'm owning up to it. Yes I want things to change by moving forward and not giving him my time any longer. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Stop being alone with him. Respect yourself enough to stay away from him, especially when you have been drinking because you know you can't be trusted not to fall back into his bed. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 Haven't we all. Now you know how it makes you feel. Think it all through and resolve not to do that again (if you can tell -- so many fake it). Once you've processed it, forget it and just stop worrying about what he thinks of you. Don't sweat it. Forgive yourself and just move on. He says anything, you roll your eyes and go, "Temporary insanity." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eggplant Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 And I'm a unthought out drunken decision I ended up sleeping with him again.Just don't get drunk outside of your home. Link to post Share on other sites
Tbisb74 Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 I definitely won't sleep with this guy again that's forsure. As for the self respect, I get it ... I guess apart of me was using him too. Apart of me knows it was not a smart decision but I'm owning up to it. Yes I want things to change by moving forward and not giving him my time any longer. In this scenario.. 'Apart' is two words, ( a part) meaning 'some measurable portion'. 'Apart' means 'separated from'. forsure, is never joined. Do not think with a part of yourself that wants sex. Keep well apart from him. That way, you'll keep your self-respect, for sure. See? Easy. Link to post Share on other sites
Kamila Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 Well you've said it really well in your title 'Slept with a man that doesn't respect me'. How will you respect yourself ? By not seeing him, at all. Even if you have to lose the friendship with his sister, the social circle. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author FaithInTheDark Posted July 29, 2014 Author Share Posted July 29, 2014 I don't think I could just cut out his sister because of him. Thanks for reminding me to forgive myself, I think I have and learned how the way these kind of things make me feel are not worth it. Don't think things could ever be the same but after reflecting I knew what I was doing but he was still disrespectful but he was a player so I guess that's how he is. Anyway things might be a tad uncomfortable if I'm at his house but rest a sure is won't be in his bed ever again Link to post Share on other sites
mikethemechanic Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Sex is apart of nature. And I go along with nature. Marilyn Monroe. Link to post Share on other sites
Tbisb74 Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Sex is apart of nature. And I go along with nature. Marilyn Monroe. No - Sex is A. part. of nature. That is, it's a component. "Sex is apart of nature" means it's separate. Which is completely opposite to what you were intending to say.... Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 I know deep down I'm so much better than the way be treated me but I just wanted to have sex and it was hard to leave him he's so physically attractive. Eh, it's hard to paint you as a victim here. If you both treat sex as a casual activity as it seems is the case here, it's no different from going to get an ice cream cone... It's all about perspective, methinks... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 You need to take a break from your social circle for a while. A mate of mine is like this guy, it's kind of funny to watch him with girls, sometimes it's pretty awful. You will keep getting sucked in if you don't take a break from it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author FaithInTheDark Posted July 30, 2014 Author Share Posted July 30, 2014 Yup, I can't play the victim in this situation. I knew what I was doing and he's a player. I just stopped by the house to drop something off for his sister bad things felt brutally ackward. I could feel the tension and I had a hard time looking in his direction. Sigh. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 Yup, I can't play the victim in this situation. I knew what I was doing and he's a player. Well was the sex even good? Why stop if he's hot...? Link to post Share on other sites
Author FaithInTheDark Posted July 30, 2014 Author Share Posted July 30, 2014 Lol the sex was good but it would be nice if things went back to the way they were before we slept together , I think the damage is done. Link to post Share on other sites
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