Losing the will to go on, no motivation.

[FrostBlaze]

I never had much motivation to begin with, i never do, i rarely get excited about doing anything for MYSELF.

If a loved one comes into the picture, then i get all fired up and leave my comfort zone and do all sorts of things and i keep to them.

I know what most people say but i can't motivate myself, i need someone to motivate me...wich would in essence be a burden on them? I slip to quick to depression.

 

When i have someone, i get the will to work more, get more $$, provide, take care, etc, moment u leave me alone i'm like "ah **** it, i don't need more than this" and i start slacking and brooding.

 

I'm 24 and i missed quite a lot of chances because of financial reasons for education, i am dissapointed in myself as a person as to what i have achieved up to this age wich is nothing, career wise or in my love life.

 

And i am just a booring person, shy, i open up real hard, if i do i'm likely on the weird side... or just plain boring. (idk how to dance or do anything "fun").

Idk how to change or what to do...i am unfortunately seeking self-destruction on a daily basis.

I think puberty hit me...at 24 xD, i'm so f'ing emotional and a wreck for the past year.

 

The good? Guess i ain't completely ugly, girls seem to see something and try before they run away .

Oh and if it wasn't obvious enough, most of my problems stem from not having a partner, i dwell on it to much...but i can't keep/get one.

Did i mention i am extremely agressive? >_> and get mad out of anything.

Edited July 27, 2014 by FrostBlaze

[d0nnivain]

Have you tried therapy?

[FrostBlaze]

yes, for my depression. But it doesn't make me more motivated, as i stated i only get motivated for others/significant other...

took pills a few months just made me more dizzy and tired, i quit, was not helping.

my sunt is a shrink, tried with her...