Thewayitwas2 Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 If you were somewhat suspicious of your significant other... Would you test them online to see if they would chat with another girl or guy? There's a website online that will test your partner ... And give you the results. Would you? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Nope. If I was that suspicious that I would go to those lengths with a BF, I'd just end the relationship. It's only dating. It's not worth that aggravation. I might do it with a spouse because there is more at stake. Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Absolutely not. You are violating the trust you two have by doing this. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Nope. If I was that suspicious that I would go to those lengths with a BF, I'd just end the relationship. It's only dating. It's not worth that aggravation. I might do it with a spouse because there is more at stake. Would you end an entire relationship based on suspicious with no evidence? What if it was a misunderstanding or just paranoid on your part? Would you have a conversation before ending? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 When you catch yourself thinking of doing something like this it's because there are already enough reasons to end the relationship. And as per everything I have read so far, I bet if you'd find him romancing another woman you'd still convince yourself to stay with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Philosoraptor Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 I'd leave when I lost trust. If I feel the need to test them then the trust is obviously gone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Would you end an entire relationship based on suspicious with no evidence? What if it was a misunderstanding or just paranoid on your part? Would you have a conversation before ending? Of course I would talk about it before going to extreme measures like snooping, spying etc. If it was a marriage I'd also do counseling 1st. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 No. If the trust were already so broken and my suspicions so high that I felt the need to do this...well, it would be the wrong relationship for my anyway. Waste of time. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 No. If I'm that suspicious we have a problem. If I feel that insecure it means we have a problem. For me personally, my intuition is spot on, and if I felt that way I would address it and I also believe what is in the dark eventually comes to the light, so no I wouldn't test them online but would bring up my feelings or wait for the evidence to show itself or just look and observe what they're doing and saying versus test them online. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Fondue Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Never. I would never allow myself to reach that point. If I am already that suspicious, chances are this relationship is going to the ****ter anyway. And also, if anyone was to do that to ME, I would end the relationship because of it. Regardless of results. It's a breech of my trust just the same. Link to post Share on other sites
me85 Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Nope, I'm not a tester. I believe things people try to hide will eventually reach the surface on it's own. Most every single female I have ever known has been distrusting of their boyfriend and not because they were doing something dishonest themselves, but because they were all with the wrong guys. I just always go with my gut. I am really very intuitive. I know when someone is being dishonest. Maybe not right away because I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt and like to believe that the majority of people are good. I've never snooped or invaded any of my boyfriends' privacy. Never even looked through any of their phones. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 And as per everything I have read so far, I bet if you'd find him romancing another woman you'd still convince yourself to stay with him. ^^ This ^^ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thewayitwas2 Posted July 28, 2014 Author Share Posted July 28, 2014 Well I saw that he consistently "liked" a very slutty woman's photos. She is clearly a stripper or bartender. The photos be liked are very gross ... She smokes etc. And he hates smokers! I haven't asked him yet who she is etc. I know i should but I have lost the courage. We had an amazing weekend together. He swore up and down that he would never ever cheat on me. That I am all that he wants. He was very clear even that he wants to marry me! So I guess I see that on FB and think hmmmmmm What if I found out he was chatting w her or someone else? Not "meeting". But chatting. Sexting etc. Then I would be heart broken. Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 judging by your other posts he sucks. Link to post Share on other sites
fred123 Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 wat if u werent in a rship and u did this. like create a fake fb account Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thewayitwas2 Posted July 28, 2014 Author Share Posted July 28, 2014 Are you suggesting that I create a fake account and temp him? Link to post Share on other sites
Elle1975 Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 No. I don't want to live like that. Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 If you were somewhat suspicious of your significant other... Would you test them online to see if they would chat with another girl or guy? There's a website online that will test your partner ... And give you the results. Would you? heck ya. why are all these do-gooder posts saying no. i would definitely find out intel if i have the means and opportunity. the relationship is likely over anyhow if it gets to the point of suspicion, so why not. it'll give more proof when i confront them Link to post Share on other sites
GravityMan Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 One of the most important ingredients in a good, solid relationship is trust. Testing your partner means that the trust is, at best, on thin ice. Most dishonest people are unable to keep up a facade or a front for very long. Eventually their true colors will bubble up to the surface. And it often happens at a time when their guard is down and they unveil what they're hiding before they realize it. Link to post Share on other sites
bubbaganoosh Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 One of my closest friends was engaged to his girlfriend and a month before the wedding, she did something really stupid. He went out to grab a fish sandwich and a beer with his cousin at a bar/restaurant and nothing more then just having something to eat and a couple beers which is out of the norm for him because he doesn't go it often. About a hour later two girls walk in and sat at the bar and the one came over and started to make small talk. In the process, she bought him another beer and he told her that two was his limit but thanked her anyhow and gave the beer to his cousin and told the girl that he's not much of a drinker and they all had a laugh and then she started asking all the questions like if he was married and if he had someone special and he told her he was getting married very soon and she got the message that he wasn't interested and she moved back over to where her girlfriend was and my buddy and his cousin left. When he saw his fiance the next day, he told her that some girl tried to pick him up and she bought him a beer but he gave it to his cousin and she was all fine with it. A week later they went to a cook out and about a hour after they got there, he spots the girl who tried to pick him up at the bar and he told his fiance that the girl was there and his fiance wasn't upset and they let it go. Finally his fiance started laughing and when he asked what was so funny she said wait a minuet and she called out the girls name from the bar and she came over. She then told my buddy that the girl was a co worker and she got her to test him and see if he would take it further with her come on and then she hugged and kissed him and told him hw proud she was of him. Now he's a easy going guy but he can't and will not put up with anyone gas lighting him and making a clown out of him unless it's in a joking way and he didn't think this was a joke, funny or something he deserved. Set his drink down and started walking towards his car, she catches up and asks where he going. He says "Home. I got some thinking to do and I'm not too sure your what I want to live with forever" and he left her there. Got home, packed a bag, called his brother and asked if he could use his cabin for a few days and went fishing for a week. He also let his brother know what happened and not to let anyone know where he is. This was before cell phones and computers and while he was gone, his fiance went ape $h!t with the wedding so close and most of it paid for by her parents. When he came back, he went to her parents house where she lived and told her, that if she had any doubts then she shouldn't have accepted the engagement ring and it would have ended there. Not only was he pissed at her but her family wanted to kill her for her stupidity. He was a good man and still is. They did work it out but she wasn't right even after the wedding, The girl came close to going nuts and all because of her stupid insecurities and lack of thinking. True story. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
WhiskeyJack Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 No I wouldn't be able to do it. If the relationship was at the point where I was considering that, I've learned its best to just leave. I've been there before, more times than I should have been, but I stayed and became paranoid. They aren't my best colours and I never wish to go there again. It just isn't worth my time. Link to post Share on other sites
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