TT Posted February 13, 2001 Share Posted February 13, 2001 I have a wonderful boyfriend of 3 1/2 yrs and a beautiful 1 1/2 yr old daughter. I'm over 25 he's five yrs older than me. We have a good relationship, and don't fight but once in a full moon. We've never fought to where we were screaming at the top of our lungs and there wasn't ever any abuse. Our life has been boring at times, with working and the kid, blah blah blah. The one thing I would love to tell him is that I'd love to be married to him someday. I don't want to ask cause I do think that's the man's job, but I want him to know how I feel without freaking him out. He's been married before and was divorced before we got together, but it was a bad marriage. I think he feels like we're already married without papers. I've heard him say something like that before. So how should I go about doing it? Is there a way to hint around, or tell him without freaking out? I think I deserve to have the happy experience of being married and having the memories. But knowing he's already done it and it was bad I can see why he might not. Let me know what you all think. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
Ed Posted February 13, 2001 Share Posted February 13, 2001 There are not many ways to hint around about wanting to get married. It sounds like you have already talked about it before, at least to some extent. You may just have to move on to the "hit him over the head with it" scheme. You really have decide how important getting/being married is to you. If you bring it up, how far are you willing to take it? I mean, if you want to be married and he doesn't....well....that leaves you with either waiting around till he is ready or finding someone else that is ready! Hints would be bringing up conversations about other people getting married or stopping by the jewelry counter at your favorite department store "just to look". Other than that you may just have to come out and say, "Hey, life is short, I want to be married one day. Are you interested?" Of course, you could always try to really get his attention by backing way off, maybe even choosing to live separately. Now that would send a message! Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted February 13, 2001 Share Posted February 13, 2001 Relationships are all about openness and communication. Communication is not a selective thing in a relationship. If you can't talk about anything and everything that's on your mind within the framework of a relationship, it will not work in the longrun. If there is a reason you think talking to him about your feelings about marriage will scare him or make him angry and that is keeping you from expressing yourself, you are with the WRONG guy. Go try again!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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