Do others have a CZ as an engagement ring????

[bedhead]

I was wondering how many people do purchase a cubic zirconia as an engagement ring?

 

My bf and I can't afford a real diamond, right now, and I was just curious how many women do walk around with one?

 

I know that it doesn't matter how much it cost it's the meaning behind it but i'm just curious

[Naive]

My first ring was a CZ. We were only 19 or so. Once we got older he bought me a diamond ring, but to be honest I keep that one in my jewelry box and wear the CZ because it's the special one. The CZ is the one he gave me with love with the desire to marry and I accepted it with no worries because all that mattered was that we were going to get married.

[Mz. Pixie]

I have told my bf that that is what I want instead of an actual diamond.

 

He took me looking at rings that I liked and the cheapest one that he liked that I did was 4500!

 

We're going to be a blended family. I'd much rather save that money or spend it on a vacation or something.

 

I had a big beautiful diamond ring in my first marriage and it doesn't make the marriage.

 

He could purchase me the ring if I wanted but I said no- the CZ was my idea. Besides to me they look just as good if not better than the real thing. My stepmom wears alot of CZ's and she can afford to purchase whatever kind of jewelry she wants. No one ever questions that they are not the real thing. Only you and your man or whoever you wish to tell will know.

[bedhead]

We were looking at diamonds on the Internet thinking that they would be cheaper then the ones that were in the store and they are but still really unbelievable.

 

Every ring that I even liked was a CZ. i thought that it was a diamond but when I brought the details up on them they were all CZs.

 

You know to tell you the truth. When he first asked if he could get a CZ instead of a diamond I was really angry. I thought that if the ring was fake then the proposal was.

 

Selfish thinking I know. It only took a day for me to think about that one and know that I was being a little brat.

 

Like you said that is a special ring because he gave it to me with love.

 

I hope I start thinking better. Every thing I say lately, I wonder how can he love someone like me.

 

I don't know what is wrong with me. I'm scared I'm going to make the worst wife there is.

 

For some reason, I'm on this kick of bringing the past up. His old flames. I was going through the computer yesterday and found an email that he wrote a girl ...I'd say a good 7 years ago. He wrote her that he loved her and she was the most amazing "girl" he's ever met. He said that he wanted to marry her in the future.

 

Stupid I know...I was engaged to a man that I was with for 4 years and lived with. But yet I get caught up in every women he's ever said I love you to or kissed. .

 

WHY!! I think I'm going crazy. It doesn't matter. He's mine now and loves me. Really they weren't anything. A fling for him. We were meant for eachother not for anyone else There is that song that I want at our wedding from Rascal Flatts called Broken Road. it talks about God Bless the broken road that led me straight to you. I love it. It says that others who broke my heart they were just northern stars leading me on my way into your lovin arms. PERFECT! With everything that both of us have dealt with, the others that have really taken our heart ripped them out and did a little dance....it fits.

 

I think maybe I'm just nervous and trying to get out every thing now so it doesn't come up in the marriage.

 

Do any of you have advise? Please no mean advise....I don't need it.

[Mz. Pixie]

Bedhead,

 

This is so wierd- but I think that song "Bless the Broken Road" is about my relationship with my BF! We must be alot alike.

 

I can see why alot of people would be offended by the thought of a CZ ring, but I'm just not material like that. Plus, the way he treats me and what we have is worth more than diamonds and gold!

 

I get jealous of my bf with his exes. Not the ex wife but the girl he dated seriously before me. It wasn't a fling. Plus, I posted somewhere that he's dated two models and a Hawaiian Tropic finalist! WHEW!

 

I've never been jealous before so this is new to me. Here is what I'm doing. I don't read his e mail, I don't go through his things- I've done it before and I only got hurt reading things he's said to other people long ago. My philosophy is unless it affects me I don't want to know.

 

I'm gonna keep my cool. He treats me like a princess and has never given me any reason to be jealous, I think I'm just scared because I've never felt like this before. Keep your cool. Vent to your girlfriends but don't come off like a jealous fishwife. Nothing turns a guy off more.

[hugznkisses21]

I dont have one cause we arent engaged but if recieved on and we had discussed the money issue i woulnt mind at all its the symbol that counts right...but if he bought me one and made me belive it was reala nd lied id be pissed. But it isnt a bad idea when u are new to marriage and saving for a new life together and once u get on your feet then spen on the ring

[bedhead]

OOOOO.....models.

 

Thing is we've had a thing that if we don't really deep down want to know these facts about other people...don't ask. But everything that I've been doing since I've been living with him has been running into things on accident.

 

He's one of those people that don't get rid of anything. He still has stuff from junior high. But yesterday I just wanted to see the emails that we wrote each other when we were dating( we were in long distance relationship for 2 years) so there is a butt load! Anyway, I was not even on his email I went on the documents where I thought he would keep most of the letters from us. There it was. You know that once you see something your like okay I'm not going to look but then your hands aren't on the same page.

 

About a couple months ago I was wanting to bring pictures of us up to send to my mom and all the pictures pop up when you open the file. women were on my man. And that made my heart sink. Then I think the first week we moved in together I wanted to read the Bible and I opened it up and BAM a picture of his ex girlfriend before me and his arms holding her so tight. I just started to cry.

 

My mind goes 50 million ways when things like that happen. i've asked him so many times to get rid of these things so it won't even be a problem. He says that he doesn't care if I see them and delete them or throw them away. They mean nothing to him he just is a pack rat. I don't even have his password to anything or get on his email but things just keep flashing in front of my eyes.

 

I hate it.

 

Sometimes I want to chuck this computer out the window and just throw all his stuff away, clothes and everything, so i won't see anything.

 

Note want to...would never do though

[binturong]

I used to be insanely jealous of my DH's ex-wife. He made a mistake when he was young and married her after knowing her for only 6 months. Their marriage lasted about as long. But it used to eat me up inside that he thought someone else was worth committing to when he wasn't proposing to me after we had been dating for 4 years. I felt like I wasn't good enough for him to marry, but she was, even though I'm a much better person than she ever was. And you know, all that thinking just flew out of my head the moment we got married. It's almost as if for some reason, I felt like I was competing with her and now I've "won". Stupid and childish, I know, but that's what happened.

 

Like you said, in the email you saw, he called her a "girl". It was a long time ago and he was young and probably not so sure of what he wanted. He's marrying YOU now, not some other girl. And like you said, all the past relationships each of you has had ended up with the two of you being together. Maybe see those past relationships as a good thing, because without them, neither of you would be the person you are today.

[Mz. Pixie]

Well, to add to this-

 

Brief background- woman he dated before me. They dated for seven months- but she would only be exclusive with him for one month- and only because he dated someone else then and she got pissed. He was in love with this girl. He held out hope for a while before we got together that she would come to her senses.

She's called, made a scene at some clubs- not pretty stuff. She borrowed a ton of money from him that she never repaid. She used him and then moved on when he cut it off. He has been broken up with her for almost a year but she bugs the piss out of me.

 

She just called this last week and it upset me. Even after he had told her not to contact him anymore. I played it cool. Last night we were talking and I was asking him about something I have to do and if he would be upset about my decision. He said, "Baby what I feel for you is so much more than I've ever felt for anyone before I don't care as long as you're happy"

 

There is another country song by Doug Stone and it says, "I never knew love- no I mean real love, I never knew this kind of love, until this moment with you"

He probably never knew love until he met you- so think of all of those ladies as practice for the REAL THING which is you!

 

He's going to marry you. He's committed to you. You trust him. Don't blow it by getting jealous. If you have doubts about his committment then tear his arse but until then keep it cool.

[bedhead]

Exactly I feel like I'm competing. it's stupid....

 

Good to know that it might go away when we get married. I was kind of feeling that it would.

 

I just started laughing at myself right now......think about this....I've been bringing these girls up. Everyone he's ever loved and MAKING him think about these people he's probably not thought about for years....

 

hhhhmmmmmm

 

i'll shut up now

[bedhead]

You're awsome I would've been on that phone screaming at her acting like a moron. Then 5 min later going oh my gosh what did I do...

[Mz. Pixie]

Well, now let me say I haven't been a angel where she's concerned.

 

One day I ended up talking to her on IM (long story)- she immediately called him and asked him out for that night after being like, "You are so sweet and I wish you guys the best" in her convo with me. He was like, "Ummmmm I'm seeing someone" He told her we were planning to go to the club where he used to hang out to dance. She goes to this club. Needless to say she made a HUGE scene- trying to hang on him on the dance floor- he shrugged her off- several other things. At the end when we were leaving she was trying to grab him around the neck and do what I don't know. He was pulling back- she was pulling down- my arm was caught in the middle. I pushed her HARD and said, "Wait just a minute" She had crossed my boundaries. She backed off quick. Later I told her she needed to have more respect for herself than to act like that. I said, you guys have been broken up a long time- he has moved on- perhaps you should. Then he told her not to contact him anymore.

 

When she called Saturday we were in the shower

I told him to call her back but he didn't want to. He eventually did. She wanted some info for one of her kids she knew he would have. If she calls back again he is going to tell her, "Look we agreed that you weren't going to contact me anymore"

 

He has loved before and I know it. It's hard. I don't bring them up though girl!

Make him talk about how fantastic YOU are- don't talk about these other women!

 

 

Focus on: "I am the prize"

[bedhead]

Thank you. I'm going to try my hardest to do that. I need to give myself more credit then I do.

 

Good luck with the ex....we had a similar thing with me ex. He would call all the time. ( come to think about it, I think they know when it would be a bad time to call ...like the shower time) But I had to finally change my number.

[Beth]

Not all engagements rings have to be diamond, or even have a stone in them. It's only a symbol. Find a unique band, or something that means something special to you. Design your own matching bands -- you can always add gemstones later.

 

I have several CZ's in various colors and in rings, earrings, bracelets, and necklaces. My wedding ring is a diamond that was handed down in the family and I had it reset on our 15th wedding anniversary in a band that I chose.

[k_lily]

I think it's great that you guys are looking at other options... I think to much hype is put on a ring that is merely a "symbol" of a much greater thing than most of us can fully comprehend. Not only do many people consider and have CZ rings but you can also look into smaller diamonds, other stones. Before we got engaged, my fiance and I wore promise rings, and mine was a Claddagh ring, which has many styles and can come with stones. Also, moonstone is a beautiful and unique option. If you are not familiar with moon stone, its more of an opal-like stone that pulls color through when light reflects on it. It's definitaly a different look, but when you find a moonstone you like, you are set for life.

[Thinkalot]

my engagement ring is an old estate ring...a ruby surrounded by diamonds. we loved it. It's not the stone that counts though, it's the act of love and feeling the goes behind the giving.

 

as for being jealous of exes... hell, I have wasted more energy than I care to think about obsessing over my fiance's ex-wife...and competing with her. I get stuck, perhaps more than most as I suffer OCD. But still. Just wanted you to know I understand, and it's a trap...once you start competing, where do you stop? it's the past. You are the present, and the future. Sometimes I still do get anxious, despite all the work I've done on myself, and to overcome the OCD.

But I am much better than I was.

 

Good luck. Just remember, dont get caught comparing and competing...it's a bad cycle!

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

Why even have an engagement ring? Just get a plain gold wedding band for the big day.

[Rosewilt]

if you guys truley love one another....and he does not have many, then tie strings on your fingers- it dont matter!!!!!!!!!

 

 

BUT- IF HE IS JUST BEING CHEAP!!!!!!!!!! HELL NO!!!!!!

My friend recently got engaged to her boyfriend who is 31 and lives with his parents, working 10 hrs a day at $15 an hour. It's not much money, but it's enough to get her a diamond.

 

Instead, he got her a huge cz, and bought himself a nice car.

 

That is so selfish of him