xxxDantexEmmelixxx Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 (edited) Hey all, so basically, I'm worried about my girlfriend changing for the worst... (I know I'm gonna get the usual "everybody changes, you just gotta accept it" crap, but hey) well, there's a few things, me and her are in a long distance relationship, I'm 16, and she is 15, and I know people will say that "relationships that young never last" but we're both very mature (well lol) for our ages, and we know that we can and will last... the only obstacle is the distance (I'm from UK, she's from Denmark) first of all, age: I know when people get around the age of 18/19 they start becoming more adventurous and trying new things, get new circles of friends etc - now, she isn't the partying/drinking type, or the usual 'popular bimbo' type of girl, she usually keeps to herself, except for the fact she hangs around with a bunch of guys (16-18 years old) and ALL of them fancy her and flirt with her, but she doesn't seem to notice, and I'm afraid that someday she is going to give in to temptation... secondly: I'm going to be her first, now, I like that, I am honoured to be this beautiful girls first, and I don't want her to have it with anyone else, but I'm afraid, cuz I've seen other girls, and been with some myself, where at first they were all innocent and sweet and loyal... then a few weeks ago after sex, they turned into sex-hungry, cheating sluts... my bestfriend is like that, not cheating, but she flirts with anything that moves, and is kinda turning a little.. slutty, and that's only from a bit of touching, she hasn't even had her first yet.... so I'm worried for the worst once me and her do it that she may become sex hungry, or easier to tempt when she is away from me (something like, if a guy tries to make a move she might think "meh, not like I'm losing my virginity or anything, so there's nothing to lose, right?" and give in to temptation third: college, now, I understand everybody goes to college, its a thing of life that can't be avoided if you want to get anywhere, but, she is so far away, and I know there will be new guys who are a bit hotter than me, who will definitely hit on her (she is REALLY pretty) and I'm afraid they'll get somewhere with her fourth thing, which is the main one that really annoys me, and kinda worries me, and I always feel sick, and just can't eat or sleep when she's out but: when she hangs around with a bunch of guys on Thursdays, and at her LANS, and all of the guys flirt and have feelings for her.. and I know they would take advantage or make a move the first time she seemed vulnerable and open.. but she is convinced that they won't (she's very gullible bless her) and I'm worried, cuz she seems kinda... vulnerable also: I'm afraid of her having one of those extremely weird days, where you end up doing something that you never thought would happen, you never wanted to happen, and inevitably forget, I've had a few days like that, like the first time I got drunk, the time I got persuaded into giving a guy a blowjob, the first time I stabbed someone, and multiple occasions when I've been round to some girls house, only intending to stay and chat and game, but ended up doing more... even though I never had feelings for them, but they managed to get me to make a move... now she promised never to hang out with the guys alone (she always has that best friend with her) and she never goes round to other guys house, but I'm afraid some mixture of these things will force fate to take a turn for the worst, and it happens... there's just so many things, I love this girl so much, we've helped eachother through so many harsh times, made it through probs the worst arguments you've ever seen (I'm a stubborn *******) and I KNOW we can, and will last... just as long as nothing bad and unexpected happens.... it's just I've only just managed to stop worrying and probing her for information on her past.... now I've started worrying about the future... (I know this was long, thanks for reading by the way ^^ please no hate, if you don't have anything good/fair to say, don't say anything at all ) Edited July 31, 2014 by xxxDantexEmmelixxx Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 Have you ever actually met this girl in person? Given that she is 15/16 years old, it is very probable that she is going to change in many ways as she grows older and has more experiences. She has barely experienced life, so once she has sex, is of legal drinking age, etc., she is likely going to try new things. Everyone does it, and there is nothing you can do about that. In fact, it is highly likely that at some point she will opt to date a guy who lives in her vicinity, if she isn't doing that already. So really, worrying about something you don't have any control over is pointless. Just enjoy what you have now with her and don't worry about hypotheticals. She is either going to decide she wants to be with you or she doesn't. You might actually be better off dating a local girl who you can see and spend time with. also: I'm afraid of her having one of those extremely weird days, where you end up doing something that you never thought would happen, you never wanted to happen, and inevitably forget, I've had a few days like that, like the first time I got drunk, the time I got persuaded into giving a guy a blowjob, the first time I stabbed someone, and multiple occasions when I've been round to some girls house, only intending to stay and chat and game, but ended up doing more... even though I never had feelings for them, but they managed to get me to make a move... now she promised never to hang out with the guys alone (she always has that best friend with her) and she never goes round to other guys house, but I'm afraid some mixture of these things will force fate to take a turn for the worst, and it happens... The first time you got persuaded to give another guy a blow job? The first time you stabbed someone? What the heck? Are you for real? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 You have been worried about these same issues since you joined LS. I understand they are pressing but they are too far in the future to worry about to this extent now. Concentrate on how good your present relationship is NOW. Let the future take care of itself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AnneT1985 Posted August 4, 2014 Share Posted August 4, 2014 I completely agree with the others. The future is an illusion as is anxiety about it. Best of luck to you! xx 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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