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I'm going to vomit... ex gf is in relationship with new ugly guy on FB...

bulldogz

By bulldogz,
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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Yeah I know the advice...

 

Someone convince me WHY I shouldnt say something, and I wont'

 

 

 

 

I"m 70% sure this woman browses this site and knows who this username is associated with. But **** it.

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frankvega

frankvega

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Same boat here. Yes I know it sucks. But I can assure you if the guy looked better than you you will feel a lot worse.

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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Poster three: I cannot put into words how much I was a nice guy... How much of my life and time I gave that person

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lauri

lauri

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Okay let me chime in.

 

Why shouldn't you say anything to her? It's simple - if you do you'll appear weak and turn her off. The biggest sign of strength is silence...not by blowing up and showing no self control by reaching out to her.

 

Want to know my suggestion? Block her and delete her. Cut her out of your life. You are better to spend all this time and energy on some new chick who will be 100x better than your ex girlfriend will ever be.

 

So ask yourself this...what do you want to be remembered as? A guy who is emotional and weak, breaking down and flipping out over her getting a new boyfriend? Or a guy who is confident, doesn't care and is strong, because you know you can find someone else?

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mtnbiker3000

mtnbiker3000

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Poster three: I cannot put into words how much I was a nice guy... How much of my life and time I gave that person

 

Sounds like you should read "No More Mr Nice Guy". Being a 'nice guy' will get you dead and buried. But I don't have to tell you that, do I?

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todreaminblue

todreaminblue

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Poster three: I cannot put into words how much I was a nice guy... How much of my life and time I gave that person

 

im sorry you feel the way you do......it really doesnt make you feel good when you are left for another person or when that ex moves on...whether the person they move on with is good looking or not.....it hurts......it isnt the guys fault your ex didnt appreciate you......when she should have.......but what it is is a definite way for you to move on.....and find someone who appreciates all that you do or would do once you heal .....give it time...i wish you well..deb

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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This breakup has probably been the worst experience of my life. I sat that with two personal **, but otherwise it is true

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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I wrote a text both pathetic, vile, and caustic at the same time, pressed send, and it didn't send. I hope this is a "sign" from the Heavens that somehow, someway it was a bad idea.

 

Am am so emotionally fragile I am relying on "signs" which I hope are not malfunctions in my iPhone 5c

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David87

David87

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This breakup has probably been the worst experience of my life. I sat that with two personal **, but otherwise it is true

 

How do you want to grow as a person if you don't go through times like this?

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irresolute

irresolute

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Poster three: I cannot put into words how much I was a nice guy... How much of my life and time I gave that person

 

I really don't fall for nice guys. They are boring and predictable.

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irresolute

irresolute

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I wrote a text both pathetic, vile, and caustic at the same time, pressed send, and it didn't send. I hope this is a "sign" from the Heavens that somehow, someway it was a bad idea.

 

Am am so emotionally fragile I am relying on "signs" which I hope are not malfunctions in my iPhone 5c

 

 

Good for that iphone. He's saved you ;)

 

Listen, calm down, go for a walk, or even better, do some exercise. Go for a run. And then watch a movie. Have you seen 500 days of summer? It's a good one.

And after all that, go to your Facebook and unfollow the bitch. If you can handle it, block the bitch.

 

 

She doesn't deserve any more words from you. don't give her the satisfaction to see your text on his phone. Ignore. Just ignore. It's the best medicine.

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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It is going to take strength to not contact her, and to move on.

 

 

The same kind of strength that I cancelled my date at the Winking Lizard for tonight after I saw the post on FB that they were there and toasting to their romance.

 

 

The world has been dark, but I think an asteroid just struck it.

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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I really don't fall for nice guys. They are boring and predictable.

 

So you fall for mean guys? I'll keep that in mind. I'll get my a**hole on and look you up

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irresolute

irresolute

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Contact her for what? To demonstrate her you still have feelings? To show her your anger (equals interest)?

 

I wouldn't do that. I'd let them enjoy their relationship, and I'd stay cool. Because you're over that kind of ****. Just don't stalk her. That's for losers. and you're not.

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hoping2heal

hoping2heal

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Yeah I know the advice...

 

Someone convince me WHY I shouldnt say something, and I wont'

 

 

 

 

I"m 70% sure this woman browses this site and knows who this username is associated with. But **** it.

 

Because it will make you look petty, bitter, and like you've got a handful of sour grapes.

 

Why did your relationship with her end?

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Lernaean_Hydra

Lernaean_Hydra

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Good for that iphone. He's saved you ;)

 

Listen, calm down, go for a walk, or even better, do some exercise. Go for a run. And then watch a movie. Have you seen 500 days of summer? It's a good one.

And after all that, go to your Facebook and unfollow the bitch. If you can handle it, block the bitch.

 

 

She doesn't deserve any more words from you. don't give her the satisfaction to see your text on his phone. Ignore. Just ignore. It's the best medicine.

 

OP, this is the realest post in this thread. Follow her advice and don't look back. If you do anything else you'll just embarrass yourself and regret it later.

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OwMyEyeball

OwMyEyeball

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So you fall for mean guys? I'll keep that in mind. I'll get my a**hole on and look you up

That's some pretty black and white thinking.

 

"Nice guy" is more broadly defined as a man who treats each relationship as a blind contract where only he knows the terms and conditions and somehow expects his partner to "clue in". A "nice guy" is always physically present, but rarely emotionally available. He approaches his partner the same way a diligent employee would approach his job. A sense of duty prevails. "Bad" emotions are to be readily controlled and never expressed. Their job is to provide at all costs, even if that means sacrificing their true self.

 

There's nothing really all that "nice" about them, but it's the term that's stuck since they're generally harmless when it comes to physical abuse. They feel above that. Emotional abuse on the other hand ...

 

Unassertive, low self-esteem, emotionally absent and generally inauthentic. That's a "nice" guy.

 

And no, we don't live in a word of dualism where the only possible alternative to a "nice" guy is a "jerk". Also, "nice" guys fall under a spectrum of common traits. Some are "nicer" than others.

 

It's possible to be an authentic man who also genuinely cares for his partner.

 

"Nice" guy is the wrong term. "Fake" guy is far more accurate. What I dislike so much about the "nice" tag is that it gives the guy who's in that state an easy out. "But being nice is fantastic! What's wrong with being nice?! Something must be wrong with her if she's unable to grasp that!"

 

Anyhow, I'm not accusing you of falling under that spectrum. Just trying to provide a bit more clarity on what the others are thinking when they ID a "nice" guy.

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mtnbiker3000

mtnbiker3000

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So you fall for mean guys? I'll keep that in mind. I'll get my a**hole on and look you up

 

No girls like a 'nice guy'. Maybe they say / think they do. Maybe for a while at first. But that behavior will ruin a relationship in the long run. 100% guaranteed.

 

And it doesn't matter if it's with the ex or a new girl. If you don't recognize and address your tendencies and behaviors, the outcome will be the same, over and over again!!

 

Again, I recommend you read 'No More Mr Nice Guy'. Or else get used to this feeling. It's you, not them...

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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I may actually vomit; I may take a vacation day tomorrow.

 

 

My ex scored herself someone that will never dump her; so she's in control can dump if she wants. Sux b/c she's 29 ticking clock wants marriage and will settle.

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mtnbiker3000

mtnbiker3000

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Because of my temper.

 

Sure about that? Your previous post states you were nothin' but nice. I think guys always want to blame their 'temper'. Dig deeper. I bet there's more!!!

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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From the course of events today, I know the Man up top is looking out fir me.

 

 

Regardless, I don't know how anyone can move on from something like this

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bulldogz

bulldogz

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Sure about that? Your previous post states you were nothin' but nice. I think guys always want to blame their 'temper'. Dig deeper. I bet there's more!!!

 

mntnbiker, I was both very selfless and nice, but also incredibly angry during arguments...

 

... Rape/assault victim sees any conflict as violent and labelled me bad guy from February 21st to April 28th

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