juststarry6443 Posted August 4, 2014 Share Posted August 4, 2014 Am I immature in a sense, to want/feel the need to keep my relationships with my family members close? Like I keep feeling disappointed & upset tht my cousins aren't close to me like they use to be, aren't noticing, & aren't putting in the effort to stay close with me. I realize eventually we all just grow up & we start getting busy & we eventually fall in love but my cousins are/were my best friends we even got matching tattoos...Am I being overly sensitive? I don't know how to just see it as a situation to just let go just because they are so involved in their relationships right now. Like I feel the need to make them notice. Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted August 4, 2014 Share Posted August 4, 2014 No, it's not immature...it's human nature to want connection and closeness. It sounds as if they are presently in relationships but you are not yet...and you properly realize that their priorities have shifted, which is appropriate...but it is leaving you feeling "left out" or not as cared for, important to them. (I'm not sure...that's just what I'm taking from your post.) You might want to tell them that you KNOW they have other priorities, that it's part of growing up, that you're happy for them...BUT you still miss them and wonder if you all can get together (by yourselves, without partners) and see if there is some way you can still maintain closeness even in this new, more grown-up paradigm...which is only going to 'promote' more distance, what with careers, marriage, mortgages, children, aging parents and all the rest of life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted August 4, 2014 Share Posted August 4, 2014 my oldest girl is moving out she is not a girl anymore she is a young woman with a girl of her own......i feel this real heartache when i think of her leaving ...i still see her through all the years we have spent together.....i feel heartache because i want her to be close to me and not leave.....but its inevitable i have to let go ....and i will.....because if i hold on ....it just pushes them further away....knowing this doesnt stop the heartache though.....the sadness, the anxiety that i wont be there on hand if she needs me to be.....i feel all my girls moving away from me intensely....they are growing women...with defined independent streaks.....they have stayed with me longer than i stayed with my parents......i have always been a gypsy......i wander.......and i move on......but it has alwasy been with them.......sometimes you have to let go of what was and is for what will be.....and i am not used to letting go.....i fight to hold on till i cant fight no more.......i have had to let go of people i care about so much recently it is causing real heartache but i have to do it...just like you have to let go........best wishes.......deb Link to post Share on other sites
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