A New Start

[thekid36]

I am currently living with a separated woman who has two children. One is seven and the other four. Her ex is an abusive alcoholic who only cares for his own self. One who refuses to recognize his addiction. He does not live at the house any longer. She has been having primary custody. The divorce is not final at this point.

 

 

My girlfriend has tried to be kind with his visitation. So that the kids could still have a relationship with their dad. The plan is that he gets them Wednesday nights and on weekends. He has not been getting any better at all. All the contact this man has with them is negative. All he really does is continue to drink. He goes to bed before them and wakes up last. The kids are already suffering as a result of this instability. Thus, my girlfriend and I are planning on moving away at the end of this year. As far away that we can. Not to necessarily run away. Just to simply have a new start.

 

 

We met with her attorney on Thursday. She said my girlfriend needs to have some things lined up before leaving. So as to explain to the judge that the life of the kids would be better off somewhere else. Somewhere she could have a full time job and make much more money than now. A place which is actually better for her health. Since she suffers from severe asthma. The kids will be in both individual and family therapy. She is willing to give her ex the summer with his kids. Not that she really wants to. Her attorney advised her she may have to. Basically, the court will not accept the fact by itself that you might desire moving away to get your children away from an abusive alcoholic. Because of parent rights and all that.

 

 

Her kids already resent me at this point. I am going to be seen as the one who is taking them away from their father. Even though my other half wants to leave this area just as much. She planned to leave this actual state within a year or so even before we met. Despite all of the abuse they witnessed, they still have loyalties toward dad. They also have a lot of conflicting feelings. This is something I have been aware of all along. I am more than willing to sacrifice my own relationship with them if it means that they are in a much more safe and stable environment. I had a horrible childhood and am not going to sit by and watch this man screw with them any longer.

 

 

Do you all think that we are making the right decision? Is there any chance the court will not let us get away? Does anyone else have any experience with something like this? She has so much more to offer the kids. We also have their best interest at heart. All he has going for him really is that he basically put his penis inside her vagina. He and his family only care about looking good and getting money out of all this. They refuse to recognize the abuse and alcoholism. We know it will all be incredibly challenging the first few years. Yet, life is also about the marathon and not a sprint. You have to perhaps have some bad initially if it means having good in the long run, right?