zep52 Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 Does anybody think that love is really all you need to make a relationship work, or are there always other factors that color a relationship ? I love my ex with all my heart, and i truly believe that she has love for me also, but she is always analyzing the relationship, and finding reasons why it cant work, money, security, etc I would do anything for her but we have been apart now for two months, with one month NC and im falling apart, i need to be able to make her believe that we would be OK but HOW, done all the flowers and gift stuff, just need to make her believe in me, we could make it, and loving each other has to be a good start, so why will she not give us that chance ? Today is one of those black days, but i cant walk away from her, i just cant, she is my love, my life, and all is empty without her, HELP PLEASE Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 No, I don't think love is all you need. There are many things that affect whether or not a relationship will be successful. Love is just one of those variables. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 Love is not nearly enough, much less being all you need. You need companionship and compatibility and the ability to live together well and to meet each others' needs and no family interference and good mental health and absence of addictions... clearly I could go on but you get the drift. Love is necessary but not sufficient. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zep52 Posted February 26, 2005 Author Share Posted February 26, 2005 Ok i see your points both of you, but surely love is the key building block that the rest is built upon, relationships grow and change and require work for them to grow, my point is that if both parties are clean living, with no mental problems and a sound financial footing then surely love is the key ingredient, Women it seems to me as a man are prone to over analyzing, this is ok to a point but if you look hard enough you will always find something which could be better, surely if you love someone, and there are no major stumbling blocks, the rest is just icing on the cake !! Love it seems to me is the holy grail, once found it must be held onto at any cost, well almost any cost, everything else can be acquired with work and commitment, but love is a rare gem that is hard to find and as such must be prized and fought for, i could be wrong, but my heart tells me otherwise, thanks girls.. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 Your heart hasn't been reading the relationship literature surely if you love someone, and there are no major stumbling blocks Right there's one of your problems. You seem to be assuming that that which you might consider 'major stumbling blocks' or not will be identical to what everyone else ought to consider 'major stumbling blocks' or not. It's not the case. To you, love is all. To others, not the same. If you're not both on the same page, you won't end up in the same place. Clearly you two are not on the same page and your theory, no matter how much you may believe in it, is not true for everyone, especially not her. So your question is really 'why doesn't the world work the way I think it ought' and the answer is that it's because everybody thinks it ought to work differently. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zep52 Posted February 26, 2005 Author Share Posted February 26, 2005 Yep i have been accused of being a romantic and an idealist, so i think you are quite right, but it seems that my ideals are the same ideals that most of the people i know who are either married or in committed relationships adhere to, so they cant be that far off the mark, I accept that people view life through different eyes and come up with their own interpretations of what they see, but on the whole people see roughly the same things and their interpretations while not wholly the same are very nearly the same, give or take a few deletions or additions, It seems to me that people today are to willing to throw something of former value away and get the latest and newest version, my mother and father went through 40 yrs of marriage and they had many big ups and downs, but at the end of the day they were a team and they loved each other, and despite what ever came their way they knew that they loved each other and that nothing could rob them of that love, and in that knowledge they knew that they had everything . Link to post Share on other sites
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