My girlfriend lost "almost all" her feelings?

[Smilecharmer]

Have you ever met her in person?

[TAV]

Have you ever met her in person?

 

No, he has not met her yet, that is one of their issues.

[ExpatInItaly]

I already explained she is confused, and I broke it for a couple of days (she didn't last long, obviously LOL) she's confused about a few funny things she noticed. After giving her some time to not be able to contact me, she kept texting me. She didn't last 12hrs. So we talked about it, and she doesn't want the break, so next step!

 

I wrote that to someone else, obviously I can't expect you to read through all of my replies, but it was there. As I said in my last reply, the goal now is to go meet her to see if this is worth pursuing like this. I have to get her parents permission of course, and that's where I'm at.

 

Thanks for the reply, chimp!

 

I understand you aren't trying to be a jerk, but your replies generally seem more negative. I am going to talk to her on the phone tomorrow to get a clear idea of what we're gonna do I'll update you on how that goes if you'd like!

 

What funny things?

 

And no, I don't think you should push her or her parents. That is only going to make it a lot more difficult, as her parents will likely be very resistant to your insistence. She is still a minor, no matter how small the age gap.

[justwhoiam]

Haven't seen the movie.... I can check it out! Looks like it's pretty old Haha!

If a 2002 movie is old, then what is a movie from the 60s? And from the 40s? I won't go back any further...

 

I can get them on the phone and talk there and negotiate a deal. I fly out there and they can meet me at the airport.

Maybe you can attend her 16th bday party? She could have her party at home, they'd be in control and you'd have a chance to meet her and spend some time with her. And everyone would be happy.

 

I am about 6'6

6'6 is an awful lot. How tall is she? I guess it's a bit intimidating if she's small and 15. I love a tall guy and he's 6 and he looks so tall to me already.

 

they allowed me to have her physical address, email, phone numbers etc.

That's a lot already, from them. Don't rush things, don't make them uncomfortable.

 

Any ideas of how to build some level of trust with them?

They'll have to meet you in person.

 

Sending them a tweet or Facebook message for example, I just don't know if that will come across creepy or acceptable/friendly. Virtually every idea I have of initializing a connection with them, has a potentially creepy risk attached to it.

Indeed. Do not add them anywhere. Only if they asked you to. But I guess not, at this stage. You're not a relative yet. Not their son-in-law.

 

Would contacting them through the daughter be of any use?

Let her let them in slowly. Like it's 4th of July. You call her towards the end of her lunch and say happy 4th of July. She puts you in hands-free mode on her mobile and you can tell anybody there and they will thank you. Same for Thanksgiving, etc. Let them be familiar with you, and comfortable. Pick the appropriate times when you know the family is together. And keep it short. Don't keep her away from the table at lunch or dinner. Be considerate. They will appreciate it.

 

IF I go through the daughter, I have 2 options that I can think of.

 

1) I have her kindly ask her parents for permission to give me their contact information.

2) I have her speak for me and them, so we communicate with her.

Sorry but you didn't consider the best option, in fact with option #1 you let her out of it, and with option #2 you'd load her with further burdens/responsibilities, and it shouldn't be on her. Both will create tension and misunderstandings. Please see the other option in my previous comment.

 

I figure it's better I give you too much than too little, yes?

Yes, I agree. There's such a thing as too much, too long, too tiresome, but it was not your case.

[BridgetGrey]

This happens in long distance when you both do not get the physical intimacy and when the sparks die down. My ex told lost his feelings for me I think partly he is not lying , because the distance does puts in so much disconnection. However , other factors played in like my ex commitment issues.

 

The best thing is go no contact and try to move on. I hate to say this because I know many of you are in this boat of LDR , but loving someone is not enough you need comprise and commitment and a plan to be together eventually.

[GemmaUK]

You haven't ever even met each other so this really isn't an actual relationship.

 

Every single one of your posts show that you are manipulative.

You're trying to change her mind, her parents mind, you are checking upon her by monitoring/networking (whatever you want to call it).

 

You're also missing something crucial - which I think you don't see but if you do I'm getting the impression that you would attempt to manipulate that if at any point you two actually did get together.

You say you want someone who will basically be homely yet she is academically focused. She wants a career from the sound of it.

 

I have to wonder whether you chose a younger girl in order that you could manipulate and mould her to be who you want her to be.

 

She is growing up and has a mind and opinions of her own.

She has lost interest and has realised this isn't a relationship at all, she is also following her instinct. Instincts make a person lose interest. It's unavoidable.