Fear of Hurt

[Silly Girl]

I have had really bad experiences with relationships in the past.

 

I am not the kind of person who needs a man to feel fulfilled.

 

I do, however, have a great fear of getting hurt, because it has happened before. I understand that this is a part of life, but having a relationship is important to me, yet I won't just settle for anyone.

 

It's just that you would think I would almost be immune to getting hurt, but I seem to be finding it harder to bear. I'm too scared to get too close to anyone now, especially after my relationship. I was deeply in love with this person, we had our reasons for splitting, but it really cut me up inside. I'm terrified of going through that again.

 

As you can probably guess, I am a very emotional person. I was brought up in a family full of women, no real father figure, no brothers, and I went to an all girl's school. I feel that sometimes I have a real problem relating to men, their expectations, and I have developed a distrust of men.

 

I have many great qualities to offer a person, but my main insecurity is that I always seem to feel threatened by other women, as though I won't be enough for one person. I am in the unfortunate position of admitting that every guy I have ever had any sort of involvement with, always prefers someone else over me, and I honest to God can't figure out why - I'm very attractive, intelligent, funny, loyal....I will add though, I am great at hiding my the fact that I'm afraid that another girl will grab my man's attention.

 

I'm sick of being scared of getting hurt. I have learnt from my past, but this fear has not become any less.

 

Any advice?

[Tony T]

You create your own reality. That which you fear the most will come to pass.

 

Until you change your thinking, your life will not change. You must work to truly believe that things will work out for you, that you will attract the right men into your life, and they will be honorable and trustworthy.

 

Your mind is extremely powerful. The greatest spiritual leaders through the ages have taught, "As ye think, so shall it be." Your are your thoughts. Everything that happens in your life is first a thought. Our thoughts are manifest in our external life.

 

Think only on positive things and your life will become positive. Do not falter from the positive.

 

Read some books on positive thinking...or get some great self-hypnosis tapes...and train your brain to attract good into your life. I know this sounds hokey...but it's just the way it works. Keep up your negative thinking and you will stuck in this place forever.