Husband on forums bashing wife, while I'm in hospital

[Mr. Lucky]

Either I'm not as smart as everyone else or half of this thread seems to be missing.

 

Is the dialog in the first couple posts lifted from another thread or forum???

 

Mr. Lucky

[LuciaLove]

Either I'm not as smart as everyone else or half of this thread seems to be missing.

 

Is the dialog in the first couple posts lifted from another thread or forum???

 

Mr. Lucky

 

Can only imagine the confusion. Cliff notes:

 

1. wife ('tis I) suffers mental health break down and attempts suicide

2. husband post list of relationship grievances while wife is in hospital on Loveshack

3. wife finds list after everyone is fine and healthy again, and is upset about being spoken of like that while in hospital.

4. wife posts defense on new thread (this thread)

5. the rest is above.

 

Hope that's helpful.

[Mr. Lucky]

Got it but still confused. If you're doing so well, madly in love (both good to hear in light of previous events BTW) and have taken a forum/Internet vow of silence, why the need to now post the detailed rebuttal to his thoughts?

 

Mr. Lucky

[LuciaLove]

Got it but still confused. If you're doing so well, madly in love (both good to hear in light of previous events BTW) and have taken a forum/Internet vow of silence, why the need to now post the detailed rebuttal to his thoughts?

 

Mr. Lucky

 

I think you don't understand the chronology of events or haven't read the whole thread. I would explain it but I don't want to repeat myself.

[2sunny]

My hope is that you both have addressed your concerns with each other - and it looks like you have... Good!

 

And keep in mind - he cares about you and your well being. He made effort to get you help when it was needed.

 

His head was spinning too back then - and was trying to figure out the best plan to take care of you.

 

It was crazy for him. Think also, of how HE was feeling...

 

I hope you two can work through your grievances to the OTHER side... And make things better.

[Els]

The opening post is confusing the heck outta me. Are you two having a public argument on LS?

[acrosstheuniverse]

The opening post is confusing the heck outta me. Are you two having a public argument on LS?

 

I think the OP stumbled upon her Husband's post on here, and she's now rebutting it in her own thread without linking back to his, so it looks very confusing. That's what I gathered anyway.

 

And you're welcome LuciaLove. I can only imagine the pain of seeing something like this and it sounds like with another day to think about it you've started to see that he posted in his worst moment, and most of us would have awful things to say about our partners in those moments. However, hopefully you will both still address the issues that have been brought to light instead of letting them fester good luck.

[Mr. Lucky]

I think you don't understand the chronology of events or haven't read the whole thread. I would explain it but I don't want to repeat myself.

 

Got it based on the clarification you provided but perhaps didn't word my question very well.

 

As you stated in your original post, you're not looking for advice.

 

So what gain or benefit do you seek in posting your rebuttal to your husband's original thread?

 

Mr. Lucky

[Janesays]

Honestly, I disagree with most of the people in this thread.

 

OP, your husband sounds like a passive aggressive prick with a martyr complex.

 

All his talk about "his" money and "your" money is BS. You are MARRIED. Legally, every dime he makes is ALSO YOURS. If he didn't want to be the breadwinner in a relationship, he shouldn't have married you. It's not like your were swimming in hundred dollar bills when you got married, right? He knew what he was signing up for, but now he wants to cry about it now.

 

You have let him manipulate and guilt you into believing that the only way to contribute to a relationship is $$. ESPECIALLY when you are in the process of building your own business, it is NORMAL and EXPECTED that you will not have a lot of extra income. He's coming down on you hardcore because you're still in the building stages.....but what do you want to bet he's going to be the first in line to spend all the money should you be successful? What do you want to bet he'll be suing you for his portion of your business if you divorce? All the while he's acting like nothing you do has any value....but at the end of the day, even if you only have MINOR success....the asset you are building is going to be of more value than his job. ESPECIALLY if he's prone to blowing his money on travel and hobbies.

 

Yeah, it sucks that you got sick. (And mentally sick is still sick) But the fact that's he's playing the woe-is-me card about this is really rotten. If he got into a car accident and was paralyzed from the waist down, would you stick by him? Love him? Support him? If the answer is yes, then you should accept NO LESS treatment from him when YOU get sick. In sickness and in health anyone?

 

The crap he pulled by confronting you in front of his friend was REALLY SHOCKINGLY RUDE. Not just towards you, but towards the friend. No friend wants to be dragged into the middle of a marital battle. And the fact that he did this proves that he's not just talking smack about you on a forum of strangers. He's actually talking smack in front of a bunch of REAL LIFE FRIENDS. This is a betrayal of trust. This man has no loyalty. This right here would be a deal breaker for me.

 

And no, he should not invite people to stay with you without even discussing it with you. No one. Ever. No exceptions. That's just common courtesy.

 

I'm not absolving you of your issues. But I will say that you do have a right to be upset by the way you're being treated here.

 

This would not be the man for me. I'm sorry that you're are struggling mentally so much that you don't realize that this man isn't the one for you either. There ARE men out there who understand that marriages include good times and bad....and those bad times should be weathered TOGETHER with respect, caring, loyalty, teamwork and fairness.

 

Clean up yourself. Clean up your house. And move on. That's my advice.