you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 I have noticed that I have a harder time attracting average looking girls than I do attractive girls, and it ****s with my brain how this is possible? The worst rejection (meaning the most hostile) I ever received was from a girl who was barely average looking, and there have been other cases where meh looking girls were quick to give me the cold shoulder. Yet I have had much better luck with attractive women, even when it comes to randomly locking eyes with a girl attractive girls have consistently been more flirting and inviting towards me. What the hell is up with that? any other guy deal with this? Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 I've been called pretty, beautiful, hot, sexy, feminine etc by people I know (not just by men I am in relationships) with but if a very good looking guy showed interest in me I would be curious as to his level of sincerity. I'm not saying I would be mean to him but I would think he was joking around rather than actually seeing me as a potential gf. Perhaps these 'meh' women have the same way of thinking. Or perhaps they get a vibe from you that you only see them as 'meh' (which could happen in real time if you are talking with them and then your tongue and eyes drop out of your face while a stunning blonde walks by) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TigerLilly78 Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 maybe they picked up on how judgmental you are and thought na im good in the mean time the "attractive" ones are rather shallow so they "get" you? I dunno just taking a wild guess there...*shrugs* 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Author Share Posted August 21, 2014 NO, I don't treat these average looking girls differently as far as I could tell. If anything I m shier with attractive women. Of curse not all average women are like this but Its much more common for an average looking girl to give me bad vibes compared to attractive ones. Link to post Share on other sites
Author you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Author Share Posted August 21, 2014 maybe they picked up on how judgmental you are and thought na im good in the mean time the "attractive" ones are rather shallow so they "get" you? I dunno just taking a wild guess there...*shrugs* just cause I can recognize differences in attractiveness in women doesn't make me judgmental, I still hit on average looking women. Link to post Share on other sites
ktya Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 I have noticed that I have a harder time attracting average looking girls than I do attractive girls, and it ****s with my brain how this is possible? The worst rejection (meaning the most hostile) I ever received was from a girl who was barely average looking, and there have been other cases where meh looking girls were quick to give me the cold shoulder. Yet I have had much better luck with attractive women, even when it comes to randomly locking eyes with a girl attractive girls have consistently been more flirting and inviting towards me. What the hell is up with that? any other guy deal with this? Yes. I hear you. The way I see it is that the average or below average looking girls are all guarded and think that your going to play them. The hot girls are confident and sure of themselves. Women rate themselves compared to how they look with eachother (come on ladies... ) So the hot girls are like, "Yea woo" and they roll with it, knowing they can get any guy they want. The average girls are like "Hmm. what does he really want" because they know they can get sucked in and be left with not much choice if they get played out. If an average girl is into you go for it. Otherwise stick to the hot girls. I find that the fatties are the most bitchy annoying game playing women I've ever dated. I wont be taking one for the team again. I mean come on they dont look good, my buddies rib me for being with them in the first place AND they play hard to get and head games? Puhleese. Link to post Share on other sites
Assasda Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 Well physically attractive women get approached less in most social situations, or physically attractive women get approached by the same type of guys. If a woman gets mad and rejects you, while you are being totally normal she probably just has bad social skills, or is really insecure Link to post Share on other sites
Fondue Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 No need to dwell on it, just continue to court the women that are giving you the go-ahead signals. Think of it this way, "their loss." Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 Why do you go for women you deem less than attractive? I get what you're saying, although I have never in my life tried for women that I didn't think was attractive. And if I think they're attractive and I am trying for them, than that means I like them and I am not comparing them to some other girl. I am horrible at relationships that actually goes anywhere, but I have never been with a girl and thought she was less attractive than what I could get. Now, I have seen and unfortunately interacted with some women I would never consider. And yeah...some of them act like they think I am attracted and they do a preemptive rejection on me. Which is just weird. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 I've seen that. I think it's a self-esteem thing or their making themselves feel better by rejecting someone good looking. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 Pretty girls are sometimes more confidant and they are also more experienced with dealing with guys and not as afraid of rejecting one -- so they're not as afraid of saying hi to begin with. They've had to brush off suitors since they were teens and it's not pretty business, but they know it has to be done. Also a lot of very attractive girls are already taken and I've noticed that taken women are more flirty than nontaken ones. And that has to do with them knowing they have a built-in excuse where they can flirt but if the guys comes after them, all they have to do is say "I have a boyfriend." Meanwhile, they get their ego boost. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Smilecharmer Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 Maybe they have standards. Just because you don't perceive them as attractive means nothing, people have internal beauty which isn't always apparent to shallow observers. Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 The key is humbleness. The more humble the woman, the less pretentious she will be when she "rejects" you (if she is uninterested of course). Women who think they are all that and a bag of chips, regardless of how they look, will be rude no matter what Link to post Share on other sites
Dork Vader Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 I have had this happen before. Who knows why it happens.. I think a lot can play into it. Your attitude when asking them out. They also might question your motives. They also might automatically right you off as not their type. They also might assume you have a ton of woman. If so they don't want to deal with that. They also could have boy friends. Who knows what their motives are for shutting you down. Link to post Share on other sites
letmoc Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 Pretty girls are sometimes more confidant and they are also more experienced with dealing with guys and not as afraid of rejecting one -- so they're not as afraid of saying hi to begin with. They've had to brush off suitors since they were teens and it's not pretty business, but they know it has to be done. Also a lot of very attractive girls are already taken and I've noticed that taken women are more flirty than nontaken ones. And that has to do with them knowing they have a built-in excuse where they can flirt but if the guys comes after them, all they have to do is say "I have a boyfriend." Meanwhile, they get their ego boost. This is spot on. I have a boyfriend but I enjoy the ego boost when I get hit on and it makes me feel like I still "got it". But I don't understand this offense that some people take to "unattractive people" daring to hit on them. It takes nothing away from you as a person. Physically I know I am probably considered above average in the looks department and it happens to me every day. There is a homeless man near my house who tells me he is going to marry me. I don't go home and suddenly think there is something wrong with me. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Author Share Posted August 21, 2014 (edited) Maybe they have standards. Just because you don't perceive them as attractive means nothing, people have internal beauty which isn't always apparent to shallow observers. awesome, cause every time an average looking girl is giving me an attitude its clearly because I am a shallow observer. Edited August 21, 2014 by you_can_not_see_me Link to post Share on other sites
Smilecharmer Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 awesome, cause every time an average looking girl is giving me an attitude its clearly because I am a shallow observer. If someone gives you attitude, walk away. Don't interact with them just because you feel they are average looking and should behave better than beautiful girls. The reason I mentioned shallow is because you are defining their worth and what they should act like based on their attractiveness to you. If I go out with three of my gfs, we all have different tastes in men so the ones they find extremely attractive doesn't always even register with me. Attractiveness is subjective. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TigerLilly78 Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 awesome, cause every time an average looking girl is giving me an attitude its clearly because I am a shallow observer. This could just be spot on most people aren't stupid and they can tell when some one thinks less of them as you clearly do in some cases why you even try to date women who you clearly find unattractive is beyond me.. If someone gives you attitude, walk away. Don't interact with them just because you feel they are average looking and should behave better than beautiful girls. The reason I mentioned shallow is because you are defining their worth and what they should act like based on their attractiveness to you. If I go out with three of my gfs, we all have different tastes in men so the ones they find extremely attractive doesn't always even register with me. Attractiveness is subjective. Thank you ya nailed what I was trying to say perfectly! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Author Share Posted August 21, 2014 If someone gives you attitude, walk away. Don't interact with them just because you feel they are average looking and should behave better than beautiful girls. The reason I mentioned shallow is because you are defining their worth and what they should act like based on their attractiveness to you. If I go out with three of my gfs, we all have different tastes in men so the ones they find extremely attractive doesn't always even register with me. Attractiveness is subjective. You are making an assumption, I don't think their worth is based on their attractiveness. why is it some how mentioning the fact that there are attractive and average looking women automatically makes me shallow and judgmental? I still approach average looking girls, but the worst interactions I have ever had with girls have pretty much always been with average looking girls for some reason. Of course not all average looking girls give me a bad reception, quite a few are nice, but there does seem to be a trend. The contrast is most apparent when just making random eye contact, its quite often for an attractive girl to give me a nice smile and look inviting when we make eye contact, but with a lot of average looking girls they look upset and annoyed. Link to post Share on other sites
Smilecharmer Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 You are making an assumption, I don't think their worth is based on their attractiveness. why is it some how mentioning the fact that there are attractive and average looking women automatically makes me shallow and judgmental? I still approach average looking girls, but the worst interactions I have ever had with girls have pretty much always been with average looking girls for some reason. Of course not all average looking girls give me a bad reception, quite a few are nice, but there does seem to be a trend. The contrast is most apparent when just making random eye contact, its quite often for an attractive girl to give me a nice smile and look inviting when we make eye contact, but with a lot of average looking girls they look upset and annoyed. If this was true, you wouldn't question "average" girls responses to you. You would just say some girls aren't into me. Not base their responses on their looks. Look, I personally don't think their reactions are different, but that you think average girls should be more hard up and react to any man positively because they aren't as attractive so you notice when the average girls reject you more. And of course, I'm assuming things from your posts, I don't know you and I'm not with you when you flirt so I have to assume just like everyone here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Author Share Posted August 21, 2014 This could just be spot on most people aren't stupid and they can tell when some one thinks less of them as you clearly do in some cases why you even try to date women who you clearly find unattractive is beyond me.. Thank you ya nailed what I was trying to say perfectly! average does not equal unattractive! I can still feel physcially attracted to some average looking girls and I do not act in anyway to suggest I think any less of them, so that point is invalid. Just cause I make a thread like this doesn't mean I put up with some girl giving me a bad vibe, I made this thread to share my perceived experience and to see if anyone else experienced this as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Author Share Posted August 21, 2014 If this was true, you wouldn't question "average" girls responses to you. You would just say some girls aren't into me. Not base their responses on their looks. Look, I personally don't think their reactions are different, but that you think average girls should be more hard up and react to any man positively because they aren't as attractive so you notice when the average girls reject you more. And of course, I'm assuming things from your posts, I don't know you and I'm not with you when you flirt so I have to assume just like everyone here. But your assumptions are not based on anything I wrote, its based on how you think a lot men think and if anything that makes you judgmental! Years ago when I first got rejected by an average looking girl, I didn't think there was a correlation between the girl's attractiveness and the fact that she handed me a harsh rejection. But after a few years its a trend I have noticed. Link to post Share on other sites
TigerLilly78 Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 average does not equal unattractive! I can still feel physcially attracted to some average looking girls and I do not act in anyway to suggest I think any less of them, so that point is invalid. Just cause I make a thread like this doesn't mean I put up with some girl giving me a bad vibe, I made this thread to share my perceived experience and to see if anyone else experienced this as well. Its clear you don't find them as attractive as the other women your saying that yourself maybe you are then subconsciously acting that out? and that's what they are picking up on? hence my not understanding why you would even try with a women like that if your attraction wasn't 100% im not saying its bad you find some more attractive then others but its in the way you express that..I don't know thats just a guess there.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author you_can_not_see_me Posted August 21, 2014 Author Share Posted August 21, 2014 Its clear you don't find them as attractive as the other women your saying that yourself maybe you are then subconsciously acting that out? and that's what they are picking up on? hence my not understanding why you would even try with a women like that if your attraction wasn't 100% im not saying its bad you find some more attractive then others but its in the way you express that..I don't know thats just a guess there.. I hit on average looking girls, cause sometimes they are the only ones around and also because sometimes even if I don't think a girl is super hot I can still think she's kinda cute and worth a try. I don't think I treat average girls I approach much different from really attractive ones, but I guess there is a very small possibility I just don't notice it. Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 On top of what was said about "average" women perceiving the OP as approaching them in a certain way, I believe that a lot of "attractive" people are VERY insecure...often more insecure than "average" people. Worst, they actively seek constant reassurance of their looks (hence, their openness to compliments) and even go to extremes (i.e. plastic surgery) to preserve their looks. Also, you better watch out that these "attractive" chicks aren't looking for someone to toy with. A lot of "attractive" people enjoy playing with people - like a cat with a ball of yarn. Link to post Share on other sites
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