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Pre-enagement: If not a ring then...?


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Necklace/medallion if he doesn't want to wear a ring. Key chain with both your names or initials engraved.

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billybadass36

What's your budget? A few ideas: A nice watch. Cuff links (if he's a suit wearing kind of guy). A TV. Satellite Radio. A book that means something would be nice. A nice pocketknife would probably be a nice gift for any semi-outdoorsy guy - Marbles makes some nice ones.

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Is just the ring in general that you don't want, or is it that you haven't found any with good symbolism? I'm still going to suggest them, but two symbols come to mind...

 

Obviously there is the Claddagh Ring. If you don't already know, it's used in four ways and depending on how you wear it, this shows your relationship status. They also have it as a necklace which flat out mean you are taken.

 

There is also the millenium circles, and reaching hands....

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there is no such thing as a "pre-engagement" symbol, ring or token. society does not recoginzie it and either do most people.

 

what will be next? a "pre-pre-engangement ring"??

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Originally posted by billybadass36

What's your budget? A few ideas: A nice watch. Cuff links (if he's a suit wearing kind of guy). A TV. Satellite Radio. A book that means something would be nice. A nice pocketknife would probably be a nice gift for any semi-outdoorsy guy - Marbles makes some nice ones.

 

How exactly would a TV, radio, pocketknife be a symbol of "pre-engagement"? Nice gifts but they sure aren't symbols. :rolleyes: men. ;)

 

I say you should just buy little meaningful gifts here and there. Save the big-ticket item for offical engagement.

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there is no such thing as a "pre-engagement" symbol, ring or token. society does not recoginzie it and either do most people.

 

And this means they can't make the gesture to each other anyway? Didn't know you were so rule-bound, [color=red]ALPHAMALE.[/color]

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Originally posted by moimeme

And this means they can't make the gesture to each other anyway? Didn't know you were so rule-bound, [color=red]ALPHAMALE.[/color]

becuz i am a more traditional boy

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Well that's you, isn't it? They want to do it so they can do it. It ain't hurting you, you know.

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Originally posted by moimeme

Well that's you, isn't it? They want to do it so they can do it. It ain't hurting you, you know.

are we not here to discuss and give opinions on matters dear to us?

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billybadass36

Seriously, I got a satellite radio for christmas, and I fricking love it. It's the best gift I've ever gotten. Women want to give their men gifts that the woman, herself, likes. Why not giving the guy a gift HE'LL like for a change. Electronics and porn are excellent choices.

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MWC_LifeBeginsAt40

I got a promise ring when I was younger after dating for 4 years. I put it on my left hand, like everyone did back then, and his dad thought we were engaged. His mommy later told him that I wasn't supposed to wear it on my left hand and he made me move it, so I did but only when I was around his parents. I still have the ring 20 yrs later, but he is history.

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ladydisaster

Haha. Wow, I just read through all this. He's getting me a promise ring, but he's fidgety and I know he doesn't like to wear jewelry, so I wanted to get him something else.

 

Why we're doing a pre-engagement is because we want to symbolize our commitment but aren't quite ready to be engaged yet (school, needing to save more money, etc). Maybe it's not a recognized step but it's one we agree is good for us. We want to take it slow and make sure this is right. We both know it is in our hearts, but we also know the stress and changes marriage can bring, especially if you aren't ready. We want to make sure it will last.

 

Thanks everyone!

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Originally posted by ladydisaster

but we also know the stress and changes marriage can bring, especially if you aren't ready. We want to make sure it will last.

 

Have either of u been married before?? If not, then you have no idea of the stresses and changes that occur and you cannot prepare for them in any way whatsoever.

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ladydisaster
Have either of u been married before?? If not, then you have no idea of the stresses and changes that occur and you cannot prepare for them in any way whatsoever.

 

Fair enough.

 

All we can do is take our small steps towards it and make sure we're ready to get married and then take everything as it comes. I guess all I know is that I love him and he loves me, he's unlike anyone else I've ever met and I fall more in love with him every day, we communicate, we're honest with each other, and we're committed to working on our relationship every day and stand by each other.

 

Maybe you'll come back and give me more reasons why I can never be prepared and so on, and you're probably right. I won't argue. I'm just going to go on with what I'm doing. Sometimes the most you can do in anything is hope for the best and try to prepare yourself for the worst (though you're right, you never really can be prepared). That's life.

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Originally posted by ladydisaster

Fair enough.

 

Sometimes the most you can do in anything is hope for the best and try to prepare yourself for the worst (though you're right, you never really can be prepared). That's life.

 

Thats' right LADYDISASTER, most in life is a crap shoot. Marriage is much like having kids. It does not come with an owners manual or some book of rules. Every situation is totally unique and you will both either sink or swim and it is very hard to judge who will do what.

 

I wish you the best.

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Originally posted by billybadass36

Seriously, I got a satellite radio for christmas, and I fricking love it. It's the best gift I've ever gotten. Women want to give their men gifts that the woman, herself, likes. Why not giving the guy a gift HE'LL like for a change. Electronics and porn are excellent choices.

 

woohoo...

 

i only buy my boy electronics and porn as gifts...that's pretty funny...

 

no, seriously.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Ladydisaster -

 

If he's not into jewelry, possibly something else that can be passed down to your kids one day.

 

A humidor might be nice if he smokes cigars. He will be able to use it for things other than cigars and most humidors are really beautiful and would add to the beauty of a room. You can get the underside engraved or burnt with your names, a message, etc.

 

Also, try http://www.thingsremembered.com - lots of personalized gifts that are usually pretty affordable.

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