A turn off if a man says he doesn't want to get married?

[Darren2013]

I can orgasm and erect just fine through masturbation and looking at lesbian porn so I don't think a doctor can be of much help. The problem isn't medical but maybe a mind block. None of the women I've dated have been able to get me off like I can get myself off. I think it is a lost cause.

[hotpotato]

I can orgasm and erect just fine through masturbation and looking at lesbian porn so I don't think a doctor can be of much help. The problem isn't medical but maybe a mind block. None of the women I've dated have been able to get me off like I can get myself off. I think it is a lost cause.

 

Then cut down/eliminate your porn use.

[irresolute]

All I can say is that in my last relationship I could never maintain an erection long enough. I would go soft just before putting the condom on. It is like some unseen force puts up a block.

 

You need to seek help. A counselor or a doctor. You're probably having some distress because of this problem and this might be affecting other areas in your life.

 

It's not a commitment issue. It's something deeper affecting you.

[Darren2013]

You need to seek help. A counselor or a doctor. You're probably having some distress because of this problem and this might be affecting other areas in your life.

 

It's not a commitment issue. It's something deeper affecting you.

 

You have a point about everything except the part about it effecting other areas of my life. It certainly has not effected my professional life. I haven't gotten fired from my job and I always show up to work on time ready to work.

[Gloria25]

I can orgasm and erect just fine through masturbation and looking at lesbian porn so I don't think a doctor can be of much help. The problem isn't medical but maybe a mind block. None of the women I've dated have been able to get me off like I can get myself off. I think it is a lost cause.

 

Well, maybe you need to look at sex therapy...or, when you meet a potential mate, don't just "jump" into actual sex. Take the time to make out with them and roll into it. And do other things to get her off (i.e. oral or manually stimulating her) cuz, it's one thing to have an issue in the bedroom, but if you just throw your hands in the air and say "sorry", then you're gonna disappoint her. I mean, some people get "Whiskey-D"

 

In my "drought" periods I masturbate and when I meet someone and we have sex, I have to "touch" myself while we're doing it because my body is so used to reaching climax that way. So, you have to un-do what your body has been getting used to. Also, we women usually need extra stimulation during sex to "get there" so a penis by itself doesn't really cut it.

 

Gosh, sometimes I worry about my ability to perform when I come out of a "drought". I mean, sometimes I worry if I'm kissing, moving, etc right...So, again, IMO, when you don't practice something you get rusty.

 

I tried therapy one time for me "picking" my skin (I do that out of stress at times) and I learned that when you do something long enough, your body sorta goes into "autopilot" and you have to "un-train" your body to react to that stimulus.

 

See, that's why porn can really be destructive, IMO, cuz with porn some people get desensitized to having intimacy in real life. You oughta check out a movie from Joseph Gordon Levitt, it's called "Don Jon". And, the story is about the main character's self-indulgent lifestyle and the relationship between porn and his character.

[No Limit]

It's only going to be a turnoff if these women want nothing more in their lives than start a family of their own.

 

Just beware if you're dating a woman who thinks of doing it anyway without your consent, there's plenty of women who think that messing with condoms will keep their man by their side for good as soon as their pregnant or the baby's there. Hence why if you're absolutely sure, you should definitely give vasectomy a few thoughts.

 

And if you hide it from them that you're sterilized and she ends up pregnant anyway, you have a good weapon to detect cheaters.

... Or bad surgeons.

[Darren2013]

I'm confused here... Seriously, what do you want?

 

"FBs" are pretty much sex...

 

"FWBs" are mostly sex and probably catch a movie or eat out...

 

"Platonic" does not involve sex, kissing, intimacy...you pretty much just hang out doing "friendly" stuff with someone of the opposite sex.

 

So, I'm assuming you want a "platonic" relationship? I mean, you don't want sex and you don't want the person around you.

 

Didn't you say you have cancer? Is that why you don't want kids or marriage? Then if you let the person you're dating know you have a terminal disease, I don't know why you would be concerned that they would be turned off that you don't want marriage or kids. Cuz having a wife and kids is hard to do if you know you won't be around.

 

But then again, all your posts about playing hard to get, IMO, is too much effort to have a "relationship" with someone you don't want to have sex with and/or be around you for more than once a month.

 

 

As far as the cancer issue playing a part in my decision to not marry or have kids? No that has nothing to do with it. Terminal cancer or not I don't want a family in my future. However now that you mention it the very real possibility of not living a normal life span just gives me further justification in my mind not to start a family of my own. It just reinforces my decision.

[Candy_Pants]

I never found this to be a turn off. Especially in the early stages of dating.

 

It is always nice to know up front what you're "getting into".