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Why does regret hurt more than rejection?


CadeYeager

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Saw a girl that I was incredibly interested in today. We made eye contact several times. In my head I'm deciphering if it was a random locking of eyes or did it mean something... blah blah blah. Her friends were with her too which I saw as an obstacle.

 

Basically... I b*tched out in approaching her. God I hate that feeling of regret....

 

If she said no, then I could deal with it, but this thought of 'what if?' sucks sooooo bad.

 

Hell if anything her friends probably would've been super impressed. The chick would probably have thought that it was attractive that I would even do it with her friend sitting right there..

 

venting... sorry guys.

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Lernaean_Hydra

Because a rejection is clear. It isn't open-ended and there is no what if... Not making a move obviously doesn't have that same finality.

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TouchedByViolet

Lesson learned for the future! Guess you'll never know in this case but there will be ladies in the future. Carpe diem

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Because a rejection is clear. It isn't open-ended and there is no what if... Not making a move obviously doesn't have that same finality.

 

I see what you're saying. I just HAVE to get the mentality of "oh I have to say this perfectly or do this perfectly" out of my head. In all honesty I want to care less and just do it...

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Lesson learned for the future! Guess you'll never know in this case but there will be ladies in the future. Carpe diem

 

Well this wasn't the first time I seen her... and it was diffidently not the first time I've missed out on approaching her.

 

I'm a loser for "being afraid" of a girl I want.

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JuneJulySeptember

Regret only hurts me in a bulk sense.

 

I may regret not being more aggressive as a whole in my late 20s for instance, but I don't regret not going after certain women.

 

For me, rejection is greater than regret sometimes. I have gotten to know some women pretty well, and when they rejected me, it sent me to a pretty dark place. In retrospect, at times I have thought I would have been better off not asking at all.

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Regret only hurts me in a bulk sense.

 

I may regret not being more aggressive as a whole in my late 20s for instance, but I don't regret not going after certain women.

 

For me, rejection is greater than regret sometimes. I have gotten to know some women pretty well, and when they rejected me, it sent me to a pretty dark place. In retrospect, at times I have thought I would have been better off not asking at all.

 

I actually can relate to this and know what you mean. My last 3 rejections I thought I had a shot, but only in hindsight could I see clearly that I never had a shot, and that these girls were just friends. Sadly, the friendship isn't the same anymore, and after my 3rd and last rejection, it hit me pretty hard. I feel like I'm now closed off to girls and unless something magical happens, I honestly think I prefer living the bachelor lifestyle. Freedom is nice.

 

I hope to leave this place/mindset, but right now, I'm sort of licking my wounds since February's rejection, and am now very careful with how I interact with the opposite sex. I always catch myself in the friend zone.

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