Woman with breast enhancement attract men for said reasons

[irc333]

A woman I went out with a couple of times said she had breast implants (she's in her mid 40s).

 

Her story behind getting them was mainly due to low self esteem. She was flat chested and over time that was a problem for her. Apparently co-workers had kind of made fun of her for said flat chest. She got fed up and got some knockers implanted.

 

The only problem though, she complained of men always being attracted to her for those reasons when she really got them "for herself." I wasn't really buying into it, but of course that may be one of the reasons, but if you get a set of boobs that big...how is a guy not going to be liking them?

 

I think with it came a curse of men being attracted to her now for bigger breasts, but she only did it for herself.

 

I'm not entirely convinced that women who get breasts enlargements don't really do it 100% for themselves, she has to be doing it in order to attract men to a CERTAIN extent, right?

[guest569]

Why would she lie about it? Her reasons sound legit. Pressure and teasing definitely push people to getting surgery for various things ie. nose jobs, ears that stick out. Some women feel masculine with flat chests and yes, they do it for themselves.

[irc333]

Why would she lie about it? Her reasons sound legit. Pressure and teasing definitely push people to getting surgery for various things ie. nose jobs, ears that stick out. Some women feel masculine with flat chests and yes, they do it for themselves.

 

Well, in her case, considering the size in which she got them at, I would think she's doing it for the attention from men. Esp if she's wearing cleavage bearing tops.

[Omei]

Who cares lol just dump her ass so we can hear about the next women you're going to analyze.

[SummerDreams]

I can't, for the love of God, understand how a woman could or would put herself in a surgery situation only to put on breast enlargements FOR WHATEVER REASON. I've already had 2 big surgeries for health reasons and I know it ain't fun and most of all it makes your body a big mess. So I can't even imagine going through this procedure on purpose for aesthetic reasons. If you have flat chest, so be it, there will be men who will love you, and so on for all sizes. Women who are not secure about their body and let others influence them into doing such a drastic change by hurting their body have a bigger problem than "I don't feel sexy" and that's what they have to find out first of all.

[irc333]

I can't, for the love of God, understand how a woman could or would put herself in a surgery situation only to put on breast enlargements FOR WHATEVER REASON. I've already had 2 big surgeries for health reasons and I know it ain't fun and most of all it makes your body a big mess. So I can't even imagine going through this procedure on purpose for aesthetic reasons. If you have flat chest, so be it, there will be men who will love you, and so on for all sizes. Women who are not secure about their body and let others influence them into doing such a drastic change by hurting their body have a bigger problem than "I don't feel sexy" and that's what they have to find out first of all.

 

This does bode the question, but I had spoken with a recent female friend of mine about similar situations and she said, "Most women tend to have body image issues" as if it was a typical woman thing and not individualized.

[Lernaean_Hydra]

And? What about lesbians who get breast implants?

 

The "for myself" line isn't really the BS some people apparently think it is. We all do (or have done) things to alter our appearance FOR OURSELVES. To bolster our confidence, to like what WE see, even when we're completely alone.

 

For example - as I've said numerous times before - I lost a ton of weight and started putting serious effort into my appearance. I did it 'for myself'. The end result of me having more people attracted to me was simply a byproduct of that. Because I didn't like hating what I saw in the mirror on the way to the shower or while getting dressed in the morning. I didn't do for the male gaze. Right now, I'm sitting in my apartment in frilly pajamas, nails neatly manicured yet not a potential mate in sight. Why? Because it makes me feel good about myself to be well put-together.

 

I look at one's personal appearance like I look at housekeeping. I live alone and if I wanted to, could live in utter filth100% of the time. In fact, when I was an 18 year old slob with no one to answer to that's exactly what I did. But now, every week I do laundry, I wash dishes, vacuum my carpet and mop my floors whether I'm expecting visitors or not because I LIKE LOOKING AT IT. Because I - yes, ME, personally - don't want to look around and hate what I see. I didn't do it because I wanted to be featured in Good Housekeeping.

 

The unintended consequence though? People always want to come hang out at my house. I've got mere "acquaintances" asking me to host birthday parties or let them sleep over rather than staying at a hotel and if I have a get-together they stay long past their welcome, all because I keep a nice house.

 

That woman getting implants is dealing with virtually the same thing. She changed something about herself that was unappealing to her own eyes for her OWN SAKE. The boob-crazy little boys are an unfortunate side-effect.

Edited September 25, 2014 by Lernaean_Hydra

[irc333]

And? What about lesbians who get breast implants?

 

The "for myself" line isn't really the BS some people apparently think it is. We all do (or have done) things to alter our appearance FOR OURSELVES. To bolster our confidence, to like what WE see, even when we're completely alone.

 

For example - as I've said numerous times before - I lost a ton of weight and started putting serious effort into my appearance. I did it 'for myself'. The end result of me having more people attracted to me was simply a byproduct of that. Because I didn't like hating what I saw in the mirror on the way to the shower or while getting dressed in the morning. I didn't do for the male gaze. Right now, I'm sitting in my apartment in frilly pajamas, nails neatly manicured and not a potential mate in sight. Why? Because it makes me feel good about myself to be well put-together.

 

I look at one's personal appearance like I look at housekeeping. I live alone and if I wanted to, could live in utter filth100% of the time. In fact, when I was an 18 year old slob with no one to answer to that's exactly what I did. But now, every week I do laundry, I wash dishes, vacuum my carpet and mop my floors whether I'm expecting visitors or not because I LIKE LOOKING AT IT. Because I - yes, ME, personally - don't want to look around and hate what I see. I didn't do it because I wanted to be featured in Good Housekeeping.

 

The unintended consequence though? People always want to come hang out at my house. I've got mere "acquaintances" asking me to host birthday parties or let them sleep over rather than staying at a hotel because I keep a nice house.

 

That woman getting implants is dealing with virtually the same thing. She changed something about herself that was unappealing to her own eyes for her OWN SAKE. The boob-crazy little boys are an unfortunate side-effect.

 

 

I can understand loosing weight for the purposes of health and doing it for YOURSELF, but a boob job isn't health related, it's completely aesthetic. I would that men checking out her new knockers is hardly a minor side effect and actually the woman having done it considers it a BONUS that she's getting more attention from men.

 

I think women use the "I did the boob job for myself" line only because they may be ashamed to admit that such bonus would exist for them. Esp. if you're prancing around in low-cut blouses, that's evidence that she's indeed purposely wanting attention.

[Mascara]

A friend of mine had a double mastectomy, she is considering implants because she thinks it will help her psychologically. I can totally understand that.

[SummerDreams]

"Most women tend to have body image issues" as if it was a typical woman thing and not individualized.

 

More or less we may all feel insecure about a part (or parts) of our body. But it's one thing to say "I wish my nose would be a little smaller" and another thing to put myself into surgery, risk my health and make my nose smaller. There are women and men who make money out of their appearance (models or actors) so they have to put some effort in making it the best. But ordinary people should not, in my opinion, hurt their bodies only to feel better in their skin. Cause, as I said before, if you put yourself through this procedure, the problem you have is way bigger than a tiny insecurity. I believe that all people are unique and we should not interfere with nature, unless there is a health problem of course. If someone won't accept you due to the way you look, there is no reason to spend another minute with that person.

 

As for "I do it for me", I don't buy it. Would you do it if you were living on a deserted island with no chance of anyone seeing you ever? No. You do it cause you want to accept these acceptance looks from other people. You do it cause you feel more secure after the surgery (or weight loss or whatever drastic change) and you want people to see you like this. Well guess what. You never needed any appearance change to feel more secure, if the inner beauty and personality you may have is zero. Cause that remains zero, no matter how many appearance changes you make.

[guest569]

Esp. if you're prancing around in low-cut blouses, that's evidence that she's indeed purposely wanting attention.

 

I guess that is a bit like the "she was asking for rape".. "She is asking for that unwanted attention".

[GemmaUK]

I've never had any surgery but I have been all sorts of different sizes breast wise over the years.

 

I can barely remember being flat as I had to start wearing a bra when I was 9 years old.

 

I've been an A cup up to an EE cup. It's only the last few years I have settled at the size I am now.

 

I think she only mentioned it as she was pretty shocked by the difference she had in how she was treated by some men. (Luckily not all men are the same though. )

 

I know one thing, I wouldn't ever go for surgery or anything like that for a man I had never even met.

If I ever do anything like that and it was getting to me enough living with it then I would only go through all that for me.

[Conners]

Of course women get them for the attention. So many girls I know (early 20s, late teens) have had some done in some third world asian country for a quarter of the price and then continue to post daily selfies on facebook/instagram of their new rack! Then complain when guys act seedy towards them!

[Gaeta]

If her identity as a woman and her self-esteem suffered many years because of her lack of breasts it's normal, to a certain extent, that later in life when she was financially able to fix that aspect, she got the cadillac of all surgery.

 

At the age of 20 I had an emergency c-section. We're talking 27 years ago. The surgeon butchered my tummy. He cut my stomach muscles and didn't re-attached them before closing me up. I spent the following 20 years hiding myself and envying women with a normal tummy. When I got in my 40s and more financially stable I got it fix. I got the Cadillac of all tummy tuck, it cost me the price of a car and now at 48 I got the tummy of a 16 yo.

 

My surgery was 100% esthetic. It was for me, my self-esteem, my body image, it was also to feel like a sexy woman again, and feel confident when I undress.

 

I can totally understand a flat chested woman getting implant for her self-esteem. Of course it was also to get attention from men. This woman probably spent the last 25 years thinking she is unattractive because of her lack of breasts.

[SycamoreCircle]

I guess that is a bit like the "she was asking for rape".. "She is asking for that unwanted attention".

 

That's going a bit far, don't you think?

 

I sense some hostility from various posters on this thread. It seems like a genuine query.

[Lernaean_Hydra]

I can understand loosing weight for the purposes of health and doing it for YOURSELF, but a boob job isn't health related, it's completely aesthetic. I would that men checking out her new knockers is hardly a minor side effect and actually the woman having done it considers it a BONUS that she's getting more attention from men.

 

I think women use the "I did the boob job for myself" line only because they may be ashamed to admit that such bonus would exist for them. Esp. if you're prancing around in low-cut blouses, that's evidence that she's indeed purposely wanting attention.

 

 

Not one time did I ever say I did it for my health. Ever. Because that's not why I did it. Truth be told, my health was the furthest thing from my mind when I started losing weight.

 

As a woman in my early 20s I still had (have?) that underlying sense of invincibility in which subtly convinces me I'll somehow never die and thus health should not really on my top 10 list of things to care about. I didn't lose weight to be healthy. The lowered risk of heart disease, diabetes, cancer, etc was a side-effect. I did it because I hated seeing something I didn't like when I looked at my reflection, plain and simple.

 

So, with that being the case, again I'll state, I did it for me. I did it for my own damn vanity and nothing more. I also want to get a boob job in the near future because I don't like how deflated said weight-loss has made my breasts. And wouldn't you know, I'm determined to have one despite several partners telling me how nice they already think they are...

 

Like I said, we all do things to alter our appearance for ourselves all the time. The concept cannot seriously be that difficult to grasp.

[TigerCub]

Isn't self esteem for men or women (when it comes to looks) based on ego boosts, attracting others, or looking more like what society drills into our brains as beautiful?

 

This woman did the surgery to feel better about herself because she was taunted for being flat all her life (and that would most likely explain why she went HUGE with the boob size) - but it is also tied to her getting the validation she never got before, I think those are tied together when it comes to body image and insecurity or getting over it. There isn't anything wrong with that.

 

That's why plastic surgery is HUGE business because when it comes to looks, people get their self esteem from other peoples' responses to their looks, that's just how it is.

 

A person can be smart and good at so many things and that gives them confidence and good self esteem, but if they got a lot of negative comments about their looks or if they had a hard time attracting people due to their looks, and they felt bad about it - when they do get the surgery to fix whatever, they are doing it for themselves to no longer feel bad - but it is at the same time tied in with beauty and attraction and all that - nothing wrong with it.

[HeartbrokenNewbie]

I have breast implants which I 100% done for myself. I'm going up say one thing to you....

 

If you were born without a penis would you accept that or would you save & have one surgically put on? ... Case closed!

[SycamoreCircle]

I have breast implants which I 100% done for myself. I'm going up say one thing to you....

 

If you were born without a penis would you accept that or would you save & have one surgically put on? ... Case closed!

 

 

There's a difference. I'm guessing you weren't born without breasts. Maybe you were born without prominent breasts.

 

So the question should be reworded---if you were born without a prominent penis, would you accept that or would you save and have yours enhanced?

[TigerCub]

If there was a successful/not too risky or ridiculous expensive height surgery out there and men got it to feel better about themselves because they may have been teased about being short throughout their lives, and as a bonus it made them more attractive to women who want tall men - does that make said men weird?

 

Does it make their motivation for the surgery as a means to feel better about themselves any less valid?

 

Judging by a lot of posts on LS - I think a lot of short men would run out and get the surgery if it existed. Does that say anything bad about them? No.

[Omei]

For the record, boob jobs have been done for health reasons.

[OwMyEyeball]

You're confusing the desire to feel attractive with the desire to attract.

 

There is a difference.

 

We're social animals. We want to feel wanted or needed by others. Altering our appearance to suit that primal desire is quite natural. There may be an evolutionary basis for women feeling a stronger affinity for that type of behaviour, but men can be just the same.

 

Actively seeking a partner is a different pursuit in which simply feeling attractive helps immensely with self-confidence.

[Maleficent]

No one is in a position to decide what reasons are good or not good, true or not true, for someone's boob job.

 

If someone gets a boob job just to attract other male, she can say it is for her until she is blue in the face, it won't change the initial motivation and it will not fix the problem in the long run.

 

I can't help but wonder though. Why do you care what her motivations for breast implants is?

[irc333]

There's a difference. I'm guessing you weren't born without breasts. Maybe you were born without prominent breasts.

 

So the question should be reworded---if you were born without a prominent penis, would you accept that or would you save and have yours enhanced?

 

When someone tries to argue on a message board, people tend to grasp at straws. This particular "What if you were born with out a penis" is just a strawman argument.

[irc333]

Um because she was the one that brought it up and I figured this to be a legitimate post to write on.

 

No one is in a position to decide what reasons are good or not good, true or not true, for someone's boob job.

 

If someone gets a boob job just to attract other male, she can say it is for her until she is blue in the face, it won't change the initial motivation and it will not fix the problem in the long run.

 

I can't help but wonder though. Why do you care what her motivations for breast implants is?