Would a Narcissist/Sociopath give you a reason why the relationship ends?

[Hollywood-Tourist]

If you have been in a relationship with a Narcissist/Sociopath (especially a female), do they ever typically give closure when ending it?

[PegNosePete]

Closure does not come from other people.

Seek it within yourself and you shall achieve enlightenment.

[Hollywood-Tourist]

So it's not even a 'trait' of them to not give closure?

[Redhead14]

Closure does not come from other people.

Seek it within yourself and you shall achieve enlightenment.

 

These are very wise words, especially when dealing with a narcissist. I've experienced dating a narcissist. You have dodged a big bullet. Move on and don't look back. Pay close attention though, you may need to look over your shoulder for a while. They often say it's over and then try to twist and wind you back. Don't do it.

[Hollywood-Tourist]

Pay close attention though, you may need to look over your shoulder for a while. They often say it's over and then try to twist and wind you back. Don't do it.

 

Yes, I'm aware that you should be very wary of a Narcissists behaviour in general because they are unpredictable.

 

 

This is exactly what my girl is doing (the Narcissist) - she is manipulating me and playing tricks to wind me back in.......she thinks I'm stupid, but with the help here I can see exactly what she's up to now.

[PegNosePete]

So why are you asking us if we think she will "give" you closure?

What does that mean, closure?

What words would you like her to say to you?

Do you think she's ever likely to say those words?

[Hollywood-Tourist]

So why are you asking us if we think she will "give" you closure?

What does that mean, closure?

What words would you like her to say to you?

Do you think she's ever likely to say those words?

 

I'm asking here as it seems to be a place where a lot of questions can be answered by 'experts'.

 

 

I mean closure as in why a relationship has ended and where we go from here.

 

 

I just want her to be honest about why she hasn't been honest or clear.

 

 

Not sure if she's ever likely to say it or not.

[PegNosePete]

I mean closure as in why a relationship has ended and where we go from here.

You already know the answer to this. It's in the subject of this thread.

 

I just want her to be honest about why she hasn't been honest or clear.

You want a liar to tell you why she is a liar?

Do you realize the irony in what you're asking for?

 

Not sure if she's ever likely to say it or not.

Of course she won't. It was a rhetorical question.

 

Dude you need to BLOCK and DELETE her. She is a psycho. You need to go into NC ASAP and stop seeking validation from a certified narcissist/sociopath.

[Redhead14]

It is very unlikely she will be honest. She may not even know for sure herself. Narcissists are deeply hurt individuals. They themselves do not understand or even have the capacity to empathize with others. They do understand they are being hurtful and try to disguise that.

[OwMyEyeball]

If you're looking for expert advice on personality disorders then your best source would be a clinical psychologist.

 

Around these parts we can only really give advice on how to react to specific behaviours without really getting into specific labels.

 

PegNosePete is giving you some sound advice.

 

You're seeking honesty from an ex who is inherently dishonest. You are also looking to outwit someone who makes manipulation their life's work.

 

All you find with these types of people is greater frustration and confusion. There is no making them see the error of their ways. There is no "winning". Even highly educated therapists, clinical psychologists and psychiatrists understand there is a very low "cure" rate - and these are professional who can tackle the issue from a neutral, phased approach with the support of institutions behind them.

 

There is no closure that will come from this woman. It can only come from yourself. And it will only begin to come once you cut that poison from your life.

[whichwayisup]

If you have been in a relationship with a Narcissist/Sociopath (especially a female), do they ever typically give closure when ending it?

 

No because they do not care. When they are done, they will move on until they are ready to come back and open the door a crack but not for closure, for themselves to see if they still have any power over you (general you).

 

DF, your ex fiance is done. If she reaches out to you, it'll be ALL about her, not about you and your well being.

[whichwayisup]

I'm asking here as it seems to be a place where a lot of questions can be answered by 'experts'.

 

 

I mean closure as in why a relationship has ended and where we go from here.

 

 

I just want her to be honest about why she hasn't been honest or clear.

 

 

Not sure if she's ever likely to say it or not.

 

She has been, in her own way but you're not understanding the way she has communicated it with you. Her silence and ignoring you, cutting you out her life, giving you back the ring and ending it all with you IS her way of being as honest as she can be.

 

She is abusive and that's that.

 

I really am trying to understand why you want her back or want to hear from her.

 

Give yourself closure by accepting things as they are. Allow yourself to grieve, really grieve the loss and expectations/hopes you had in building a life with her.

[Redhead14]

No because they do not care. When they are done, they will move on until they are ready to come back and open the door a crack but not for closure, for themselves to see if they still have any power over you (general you).

 

DF, your ex fiance is done. If she reaches out to you, it'll be ALL about her, not about you and your well being.

 

This is spot on, it's about power. My Narc tried to come through my door again and I slammed it. He texted me and I blocked his number (I had it blocked but the block expired after 90 days and I hadn't reactivated it yet). He got very angry but more than that he was HURT. He pouted like a little child who didn't get their way and then thru an abusive tantrum -- not at me but to my friends and as suddenly as he went off, he turned meek and mild again to try to gain their allegiance to him against me. I had given them a heads up so they understood what was going on. It can be messy.

[PegNosePete]

She has been, in her own way but you're not understanding the way she has communicated it with you. Her silence and ignoring you, cutting you out her life, giving you back the ring and ending it all with you IS her way of being as honest as she can be.

 

She is abusive and that's that.

 

I really am trying to understand why you want her back or want to hear from her.

 

Give yourself closure by accepting things as they are. Allow yourself to grieve, really grieve the loss and expectations/hopes you had in building a life with her.

Spot on. I hope this thread doesn't have to go on for 30 pages before you realize this OP.

[me85]

It's typical for any and all RSs to end without closure. No matter what either person is like...crazy, sane, handicapped, unemployed, immature, selfish, unreliable, popular, outkast, do gooder, people pleaser, polite...etc.

 

Receiving closure from the one who broke your heart is pretty much a fairytale.

[MissBee]

If you were in fact with a sociopath or narcissist, why do you need a reason for why it ended??? Shouldn't you be GLAD you're broken up?! So the reason why doesn't matter

 

Shouldn't the fact that they are a sociopath or narcissist be enough for you to not need any additional reason?

[Maleficent]

If you have been in a relationship with a Narcissist/Sociopath (especially a female), do they ever typically give closure when ending it?

 

Of course. But the reason will most likely be their partner's fault.

[Hollywood-Tourist]

Receiving closure from the one who broke your heart is pretty much a fairytale.

 

Because the whole romance was 'fake' based on the Narcissists 'disorder'?

[Hollywood-Tourist]

Of course. But the reason will most likely be their partner's fault.

 

Funny you should say that because she did pretty much blame me for the whole fight taking place & lied at the end by saying that I tried to choke her first! Which is absolute bull****.

[GorillaTheater]

Because the whole romance was 'fake' based on the Narcissists 'disorder'?

 

More that the idea of ever getting closure after a breakup is almost always wishful thinking, regardless of the presence of a disorder.

 

You have GOT to stop letting this chick live rent-free in your head.

[Hollywood-Tourist]

If you were in fact with a sociopath or narcissist, why do you need a reason for why it ended??? Shouldn't you be GLAD you're broken up?! So the reason why doesn't matter

 

Shouldn't the fact that they are a sociopath or narcissist be enough for you to not need any additional reason?

 

It's just that she never really gave a reason why, she just said that's it and stormed off.

 

 

Now that I know what a Sociopath & Narcissist is, it is easier for me to identify what they are like because before, I never knew what one was.

[Hollywood-Tourist]

More that the idea of ever getting closure after a breakup is almost always wishful thinking, regardless of the presence of a disorder.

 

 

Why is that? Is it because they are incapable of ever telling the truth?

[Maleficent]

Funny you should say that because she did pretty much blame me for the whole fight taking place & lied at the end by saying that I tried to choke her first! Which is absolute bull****.

 

Of course - I am not surprised. Narcissists believe they are god's gift to this earth and that they are never in the wrong.

[Maleficent]

More that the idea of ever getting closure after a breakup is almost always wishful thinking, regardless of the presence of a disorder.

 

You have GOT to stop letting this chick live rent-free in your head.

 

Thing with closure is that we look for it in the other person. Which is why (almost) we never get it.

[Hollywood-Tourist]

Of course - I am not surprised. Narcissists believe they are god's gift to this earth and that they are never in the wrong.

 

The more you guys talk about Narcissists, the more I see that she is 100% one of them.

 

 

It helps put into perspective that she was one all along, I was just a fool not to realise that sooner.