...I want my first

[eyesatthemoon]

Hi…I’m a 23 year old girl and I’ve only had one relationship in my life. My first relationship, my first love was a girl. We had an on and off relationship over 6 to 7 years. It was hard for me…probably because she was my first. There were many reasons why the relationship didn’t work….but then there were many reasons why it did. But a lot more went wrong. I’ve lost my friends and I’ve lost her. I’ve lost my trust in her. I’ve even developed feelings of hatred for her. But at the same time, I love her so much. I’ve become such a wreck.

 

I’ve become closed off to people and the world. I’d work at jobs, go to classes, but I’d never really build into any long lasting friendships or relationships.

 

I’ve went on my first date with a guy a couple times, but the whole time I felt scared and vulnerable. And it frightened me even more when he kissed my cheek. I’ve never been with another. I’ve never been with a man. I just wanted to be with my first. I stopped pushing myself to date. I told myself that I wasn’t ready.

 

I thought I’d be able to get over her if I went on dates. It’s been almost a year now since we called off our relationship. I’ve ran back to her so many times and I’m trying so hard not to.

 

...How else can I get over her?

......How can I fix myself?

.........How should I cope?

[Reels]

According to you, is there any possibility to regain same kind of relationship with her that you used to had before?