Major Low Point

[snoop_dawg22]

What happened to me? Just last week I was giving advice about NC. And what did I do today? I sent an email. I feel so stupid. But I've been really missing him. I've just been feeling real sad over him lately.

[Universe]

I'm sooo sad today too. But we have to be strong. I feel sick all over my body. I'm trying so hard to forget her. It's killing me. I can barely function. But I'm just pressing on. I've never dealt with anything so hard. I feel utterly devastated. I fully believe that we'd always be together. My life doesn't make sense without her. But she's made her choice and it is her own.

 

Just try to stick with the NC. There will be good days that come mixed with the bad. We just have to get through these bad ones.

 

Good luck. You're not alone.

[beejsea2]

I know the feeling. I had been doing good and last week I came across some information that brought me down!!

 

Today is my ex's bday and all day I've been tempted to send an email or a card...but I know in the long run I'm better off without him!!

 

Just look at this as a small bump in the road to recovery!!

[snoop_dawg22]

I know I'm not alone. I feel exactly like you. That email was just a waste of energy for me. B/C I know he wont respond. I keep asking why do I waste so much time and effort on this dude? Is it out of love? Am I addicted to him? I don't know. I miss what we had. It just doesn't feel right. I know we will both make it. I was wondering how you were doing. I replied to your last post. I was proud of you. We have to be strong through the hurt. Gosh it hurts though. I have been crying off and on at my desk. Thank God no one has noticed.

[snoop_dawg22]

I just feel so weak. I broke NC with that stupid email. No I'm wondering what he's wondering. I want to see where we all will be a yr from now. Uni you'll be posting about your new love.. hey hopefully we all will!!!! I know there is no hope for a second chance with this guy.

[beejsea2]

No one wants to think that a relationship that they're in is going to end. I thought my ex was the one...I thought this was my happy every after.

 

I have come across a lot of information that makes me really wonder who he was but I still think about him, wonder how he's doing..does he think of me?? All I get from these feelings is a gut ache and I want to pound my head in for even giving him a second thought!

[search4what]

Im right there with you guys. It was my b-day the other day and the ex called me. I knew it would be hard to talk to her so I didn't answer. Unfortunetly I started to drink with some friends and called back. The conversation turned to relationship stuff and now I have undone all the progress I made in the 2.5 months since the break up. I have been really upset since we spoke and kinda annoyed at myself for some of the things I said. I guess after breaking NC you just have to reload and start all over again. I just Cant wait for the day it gets easier. Good luck all and one day happiness will return.

[Universe]

I was feeling great. I was feeling the best i have since the breakup. I was super confident and ready to meet girls and start something new. I felt so empowered and at one with myself. At the peak of it all, I ran into my ex with her new bf at a bar again (this happened before and I posted about it). This is after she spent valentine's with me instead of him and gave every indication that they're no longer together (and that she's still considering reconciling with me). SHe bumped into me and looked dreadfully sad (as she has on many other occasions). I told her how sad she looked. Next thing I know, she's crying again and getting into relationship talk. I really should have left. But I felt totally comfortable with the situation and it showed. So it didn't cross my mind to leave. The other guy was visibly uncomfortable and even said so. I was talking to him as if I was totally cool with him and didn't have a care in the world about his involvement with my ex. He just came out and said in front of her, "This is too uncomfortable for me. I'm gonna go over there." Her and I continued to talk about our stuff. But we didn't get very far. I called her out on the fact that her actions for the past 8 months say the exact opposite of what she tells me. I told her, that I'd like to believe what she has to say, but all I have to go on is the truth of her actions. I said, "When you first told me about this guy you said you didn't want to be dating him. Then every time since, you've only had bad things to say about him and act like you'r about to break up. Here it is six months later and you're still crying to me about how crappy he is. But you're still gonna go home and F$%# him!." To that she said, "UHHCCHH!" as if she were disgusted by the idea of sleeping with him. But she didn't deny that is was true.

We were interrupted and never finished our conversation. I had to leave and told her we'd talk about it later. During all this (her and I talked for about 45 minutes to an hour), I went to the bathroom and ran into him. I told him to relax, that everything was cool, and that any friend of hers is a friend of mine. He was taken aback and said, "oh well there was a period when I wanted nothing more than to kick your a**." Imagine that! This troll faced loser stole my girlfriend of 5 years and he wants to kick MY a**?

THis all went down this past wednesday. She called on Saturday "just to say hi". I did not call back. I just got a new cell phone with a new number. So I filled the Voice mailbox on my old number so she can't leave any more messages. And she doesn't have my new number. So she can't get a hold of me and I refuse to contact her.

 

So I'm doing everything I can to forget her. It hurts like hell. I'm at the lowest of lows. I feel horrible. Love sucks. I just want to erase her from my mind like in eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. It's just so painful.

 

 

sorry to dump on your thread. But this is what triggered my own Major Low Point. I'm sure you can all relate.

 

We just have to stay true to ourselves and not let these pathetic exes of ours continue to cause us grief. They're not worth it and never will be. So the sooner we get past all this, the better.

[jc]

Well I'm in the exact same place as the rest of you. I went NC for 14 days, then yesterday I started to miss him so intensely that I called him and emailed him. Yes I did both. What is wrong with me? I too last week was posting and giving advice to others about NC and I was feeling really good about things and I felt like I was finally healing.

 

And what do I do? I unravel all of that progress and call him and start crying because he said that "if he was a betting man, he wouldn't bet on us getting back together" This kills me. I love him so much and I really thought he was the one, so how can he say that and just move on with his life?

 

I don't ever want to fall in love again, it is too painful.

 

I'm at school today and all I can do is go hide in the bathroom to cry on the breaks. All I see around me in class is a sea of people who have someone to go home to, someone who loves them, someone who has made the ultimate committment and married them.

 

so back to NC again I guess.

 

Why do we do this to ourselves when we know it's not good for us?

[snoop_dawg22]

I'm glad I found this site. It is helping me deal. Well last night all I could do was cry. I don't even know where the time went. When I got home I just fell in the bed and cried. Cried myself to sleep. Then I got up and did some reading. The phone rung... no it was just mom. She asked if I was ok. Lied and she let me be. I cried some more and then just went back to bed. I haven't had anything to eat since Sunday morning. But for some reason I feel like it is going to get better. God it can't get any worse. In a way I'm glad I sent that email and then I feel so stupid. I am struggling with confusion right now and it's best to just go back to NC. As much as it sucks we all have to. Thanks guys for your post. It lets me know that I'm not the only one in the world going through this.

[searchforwhat]

Trust me you are not alone. I am feeling just the way you are. What sux is that it has been 2.5 months for me. Talking to the ex is the worst because if they are nice it gives you false hopes and if they are not, or you hear something you dont want to hear it sets you into a tail spin.

 

I talked to my ex this past wkd because she called for my birthday. Damn did that conversation go wrong. I called her at work yesterday because I was not happy with how the wkd conversation went. We talked for a couple minutes and she told me she would call me after work. Of course I sat by the phone waiting and it never rang.

 

I have to stop contacting her because it just messes up the healing process. I have finally decided to seek counciling as well. Hopefully I can start to let go. I just cant believe that someone who claimed to love me so much can shut me out that easily.

 

Snoop, whatever you do, dont call or email again, and dont use NC as a way to get him back. I was doing that, and in turn keeping that hope alive in my head. It only prolongs the pain.

 

I could tell you to go out have fun forget about him but I know it doesnt help. I have heard it all. I have gone out with other women and it doesnt help for me. I guess it is something we all just have to get through our own way. But talking to the ex is not the way. Damn I wish it was as easy as it is to write.

 

Good luck and just keep posting, it helps...well it helps me anyway. By the way, my frigin computer never lets me log in to my member name. It is search4what.

[beejsea2]

I think we all get to a point where we regress. I was doing so good for two weeks and than bam!! Last night I was very sad it was my ex's bday and I always went out and made it special for him...all I could think about was is he having a good bday and who was he with!!

 

Today I think I regained some of my senses!! If there is such a thing!! LOL

[snoop_dawg22]

I understand what you mean. Today is much better than yesterday. I think we will be able to make it through. I know it was hard for you to want to contact your ex. I think you did a good job. No we should just focus on getting back on track and making ourselves happy.

[snoop_dawg22]

I understand what you mean. Today is much better than yesterday. I think we will be able to make it through. I know it was hard for you to want to contact your ex. I think you did a good job. No we should just focus on getting back on track and making ourselves happy.

[debs]

awww ((((snoop_dawg)))) your not alone you just feel you are!

 

I know what your going through and it has been a year for me!

 

Some days I am fine but something triggers it and the crying begins!

 

Best to cry and be rid of the emotions than to bottle them up and resentment and rage sets in!

 

Things get better, time is on our side!

 

NC is a blessing!

 

Saying NO! is another fun thing as well!

[snoop_dawg22]

Thanks debs for your reply. I guess the break is still so fresh and it hurts. I mean after 3 yrs and the way it ended. I just had to be the one to do it b/c he said he didn't know if he wanted to be with me. That was the hardest thing for me to do and I sometimes feel that I made a mistake. But I do deserve to be with someone who wants to be with me. But in the back of my head I feel that he still loves me. I guess since we are in our early 20s it just wasn't the right time to be together. Ok, I will not get sad.

[Universe]

That was the hardest thing for me to do and I sometimes feel that I made a mistake. But I do deserve to be with someone who wants to be with me.

It wasn't a mistake. My ex did the same thing. She didn't want to be with me anymore, but she wouldn't break up with me. This went on for months. I finally had to initiate the break up. I've felt at times that it was a mistake. But it wasn't. I should have done it sooner. It was going to happen anyways. If either of us had not broken up with our exes, we would have been disrespecting ourselves. And you can't truly love someone if you don't have self-respect.

So don't second guess your decision. The best thing about having a relationship is the feeling of being perpetually wanted by the person that you want. You can't go on in a relationship without that.

[snoop_dawg22]

Gosh, that sounds so similar to my situation. WoW. At first I was feeling that guys just don't feel and care about relationships. But after being on LS I found out I was so wrong. This week has been a major emotional rollercoaster. My rommie got back w/ her guy and it seems like everywhere I look there is a happy couple. That's probably why I emailed him. I am now back in NC mode. I'm ready for something better. And it's going to come! For all of us.

[prayformydownfall]

Originally posted by snoop_dawg22

Gosh, that sounds so similar to my situation. WoW. At first I was feeling that guys just don't feel and care about relationships. But after being on LS I found out I was so wrong. This week has been a major emotional rollercoaster. My rommie got back w/ her guy and it seems like everywhere I look there is a happy couple. That's probably why I emailed him. I am now back in NC mode. I'm ready for something better. And it's going to come! For all of us.

 

theres a few guys on here that are struggling.... thankfully im now on the way up. Just think.... these ppl on LS that have emotions and that care deeply for ppl are out there in the world, so go get one!!!

 

we will find better, in fact i think i have found an amzing girl and its been 2 months 4 me, i'm takin everything so slow and so positively, i seem to have a million offers coming at once!

 

jus give it time snoop dawg, wen u get to where i am u will wonder y u were so upset in the first place!!

 

PFMD

[WantanS4]

I have found.... and maybe I HAD more to grieve over then most of you on here...... that the only way to get over and forget is to hate them. To hate them for who they've become, who they were (a bunch of lies and deciet) and for what they did. I was with her for 6 years... and have had no contact with her for 6 months now..... and by the way she was dressed and the way she acted the last time I met with her to discuss what happened, I hope she ends up with the sorriest sack of s*** out there. I curse the day I met her, I curse the day I slept with her, i curse the day I actually cried for her, and I curse the day (if she does) she returns. For her sake, I hope she stays away, because she's likely to get a fist in her face the second she considers asking me for forgiveness (not true, i wouldn't hit her, but hell yeah I'd get her the nastiest look i could conjure out). I wish her unhappiness, and trully, honestly, I really don't care what happens to her. She was worthless.. confused... emotionally insecure/immature.... a total waste of my time. And you know what's hilarious, she actually said to me, "I just don't want to feel guilty about doing things anymore" and there's always the "I need to grow, I need to meet other people" and my favorite "That's why i didn't do it earlier, because I didn't know what you'd do if I left you before" (what a dumb b!tch...... she's trying to be considerate.... and all she's really doing is make herself out to be a total bimbo) what does it all mean??? She was lying the whole time, and thankgod I don't have some weird disease, or something else. I can only imagine what she did when I wasn't around.

 

That's the outlook you have to take on it to get it out of your mind/heart... you need to put it in a place of anguish and misery..... somewhere dark/black.... evil in a way.