Author w11gu Posted November 21, 2014 Author Share Posted November 21, 2014 What should we say to someone claiming that he can only be fixed by her? It's quite sick, once things have been over for a long time. Well i really don't know. I still have hope, i dont know why... But i still have, im stupid, fool, idiot i know... Was i supposed to fell differently about her in this moment? 2 months after ? Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 listen. you now have that as a mindset again. she can fix me, shes my life. i need her.. man up. dont act desperate. show her or any future girl that you wont chase. this is horrible right now but it will pass trust me. and when you learn which you will when you start feeling better, then things will be clear to you. everything thats been said in this thread will make sense. get out of the house and have fun! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 listen. you now have that as a mindset again. she can fix me, shes my life. i need her.. man up. dont act desperate. show her or any future girl that you wont chase. this is horrible right now but it will pass trust me. and when you learn which you will when you start feeling better, then things will be clear to you. everything thats been said in this thread will make sense. get out of the house and have fun! Thanks for you reply. You are right and i know that i must move on! But sometimes is stronger than me :S Actually I have more fun at home, I'm not a party hard guy, i dont like to get drunk, I do not like a lot of confusion. I drown myself in games to try to escape my miserable reality. And that's how I'm going holding on, or trying to. Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 yeah but that comes with experience. we all need to start somewhere.. you are not unique or alone. what you need to do is to figure out what woman expect from you in a relationship. sure its different from person to person but some things that are mentioned a lot are. 1. dont be clingy/invest equally. 2. have an ambition in life/a carrier. 3. be confident in yourself. 4. dont be afraid to argue and to accept defeat in an argument if you are wrong. 5. be there for her when she needs you and talk less listen more. 6. support her goals in life. 7. be nice to people around her. if people around her respects you she most likely will. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 3, 2014 Author Share Posted December 3, 2014 The problem is... now that i found the perfect girl and failed (HARD) i can't find any girl capable of such place. I'm not saying that i'm too good for everyone, actually its more like the other way arround... but she is the puzzle piece that fills me. One girl in my school started to talking to me, i didn't wanted to talk back, but my values didn't allowed me to do such thing. We talk everyday and she wants to meet me... Well i Don't want it. Not because her appearance because she is actually pretty and sexy. But i can't. I such a mess --. Sry talking here about my problems. I do not have anyone to talk. Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 The problem is... now that i found the perfect girl and failed (HARD) i can't find any girl capable of such place. I'm not saying that i'm too good for everyone, actually its more like the other way arround... but she is the puzzle piece that fills me. One girl in my school started to talking to me, i didn't wanted to talk back, but my values didn't allowed me to do such thing. We talk everyday and she wants to meet me... Well i Don't want it. Not because her appearance because she is actually pretty and sexy. But i can't. I such a mess --. Sry talking here about my problems. I do not have anyone to talk. id say if you think that about her then definitely do it. dont stay inside the house. doesnt mean you have to start a relationship. just go on a freakin date will you? haha Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted December 5, 2014 Share Posted December 5, 2014 When this new girl talks to you again, tell her you're depressed because you've just been dumped and it will take a lot of time before you can heal. And that for the time being, you can't even deal with going on dates. She will start contacting you less or stop at once. Don't use a girl who likes you as a rebound. Spend time with buddies to get out of this depressed state. And have a therapist or something. When you're feeling better, and less fresh, you start dating again (if dating is even an option where you live). Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 5, 2014 Author Share Posted December 5, 2014 id say if you think that about her then definitely do it. Do what ? dont stay inside the house. doesnt mean you have to start a relationship. just go on a freakin date will you? haha yeahhh im not so sure about that Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 5, 2014 Author Share Posted December 5, 2014 (if dating is even an option where you live). hahaha what do you want to say by that ? Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted December 6, 2014 Share Posted December 6, 2014 Do what ? yeahhh im not so sure about that you think shes cute. just get to know her? maybe you'll end up liking her. the more you wait and take this from me cause i have done it. the more you sit inside waiting for a miracle to happen the longer it will take for you to feel better. this is not the end of the world. it feels terrible now but its mostly because you dont believe in yourself and you think that this was somehow the only girl out there for you. it happens to us all at one time in life. you didnt meet this girl, i had a relationship for years and got dumped. it sucks and i dont mean to make your issue smaller then mine but relationships are about bulding something together, she wasnt willing to do so and thats why shes not the right person for you, simple as that. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted December 6, 2014 Share Posted December 6, 2014 hahaha what do you want to say by that ? I meant that in some countries men and women don't date. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 7, 2014 Author Share Posted December 7, 2014 You both are telling me different things. Chados says that I must get out and go on the date with her... Justwhoiam says that I must get myself together again and then go on the date. This is confusing :S Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 7, 2014 Author Share Posted December 7, 2014 When this new girl talks to you again, tell her you're depressed because you've just been dumped and it will take a lot of time before you can heal. And that for the time being, you can't even deal with going on dates. She will start contacting you less or stop at once. Don't use a girl who likes you as a rebound. Spend time with buddies to get out of this depressed state. And have a therapist or something. When you're feeling better, and less fresh, you start dating again (if dating is even an option where you live). I would never tell her or anyone about this. Only my female best friend knows about her. I will never tell anyone about her, not because i'm embarassed by her, or that i'm lying but because she didn't want my friends to know about her, and because I'm a guy... and guys hide their feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted December 7, 2014 Share Posted December 7, 2014 I would never tell her or anyone about this. Only my female best friend knows about her. I will never tell anyone about her, not because i'm embarassed by her, or that i'm lying but because she didn't want my friends to know about her, and because I'm a guy... and guys hide their feelings. look, youre not in a long relationship breakup healing stage. you are simply feeling alone and your pride has been hurt. its different so go out on dates. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted December 8, 2014 Share Posted December 8, 2014 You both are telling me different things. Chados says that I must get out and go on the date with her... Justwhoiam says that I must get myself together again and then go on the date. This is confusing :S This is because men are more about action, like "fight fire with fire", while women are more about fate "When one door closes, another opens", which is more like give it time and something will happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 9, 2014 Author Share Posted December 9, 2014 This is because men are more about action, like "fight fire with fire", while women are more about fate "When one door closes, another opens", which is more like give it time and something will happen. How can girls be away from someone they like for such a long time? I really dont understand that. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted December 9, 2014 Share Posted December 9, 2014 How can girls be away from someone they like for such a long time? I really dont understand that. Is your real question "how can she live without me?" Maybe she did move on already. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 10, 2014 Author Share Posted December 10, 2014 (edited) Is your real question "how can she live without me?" Maybe she did move on already. Nahhh... I know that she can live without me. After all i'm not important to her, otherwise she would never have done what she did. Am i right ? At least i can answer correctly at this one. I think women are just stronger than i thought... Edited December 10, 2014 by w11gu Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 Nahhh... I know that she can live without me. After all i'm not important to her, otherwise she would never have done what she did. Am i right ? At least i can answer correctly at this one. I think women are just stronger than i thought... theres no point speculating how she feels cause nobody knows except her. but you got to understand that youve never met, and i dont see how it would be hard to get over someone like that personally. i mean even when i got dumped i probably got over it faster then my girlfriend did. were all different and i do think she will regret it. does that mean she will? no but i think so. does that mean we will get back together? i think even if she comes back, now when im feeling good again i feel more dissappointed with her and im not sure i could ever see myself going back. of course she can live without you? and of course you can live without her.. trust me on this, if you find someone else that didnt make you feel this way and you get together you wont look back. right now you see only the good things about her because this is probably the first time this really happens to you. to me its unimaginable to feel what you feel to someone i havent met. but i do understand you, and i know how you feel cause ive been there. do yourself a favour and let her go now. go out and enjoy life and find someone better suited for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 13, 2014 Author Share Posted December 13, 2014 theres no point speculating how she feels cause nobody knows except her. but you got to understand that youve never met, and i dont see how it would be hard to get over someone like that personally. i mean even when i got dumped i probably got over it faster then my girlfriend did. were all different and i do think she will regret it. does that mean she will? no but i think so. does that mean we will get back together? i think even if she comes back, now when im feeling good again i feel more dissappointed with her and im not sure i could ever see myself going back. of course she can live without you? and of course you can live without her.. trust me on this, if you find someone else that didnt make you feel this way and you get together you wont look back. right now you see only the good things about her because this is probably the first time this really happens to you. to me its unimaginable to feel what you feel to someone i havent met. but i do understand you, and i know how you feel cause ive been there. do yourself a favour and let her go now. go out and enjoy life and find someone better suited for you. I get the feeling that you think that i dont even try. I try trust me... but it is stronger than me. I am constantly thinking about her. Even when i am asleep. In the last two weeks almost every time I dreamed she appeared... Its like we are meeting in our dreams... Yeahh, im losing my mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted December 24, 2014 Author Share Posted December 24, 2014 Merry Christmas everyone... Even this will be the sadest christmas for me I Wish you guys the best Christmas so far 1 Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Merry Christmas, I understand you're trying but sometimes we have to go further then that. So something we don't expect from ourselves. I for example choosed to block my ex on Facebook, delete all pictures etc. it's terrible to do for me but I know I have to. I still believe she will come back one day and I'm afraid I'll be in a new relationship unable to know wether I will be able to stay or to leave for my ex. I just couldn't imagine not being with her and I still can't on a way. Look we are only humans and we can't control how we feel. But we can control what to do with our lives. If you choose to live or not is up to you. Go see a psychiatrist ? Talk to your parents. Open up.. Sometimes it's good to talk to people you don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted January 4, 2015 Author Share Posted January 4, 2015 Go see a psychiatrist ? Talk to your parents. Open up.. Can't see a psychiatrist because to other people I'm Perfectly Happy. Nobody knows. I'm living with my dad and our relationship ain't that close... I got no one to talk with. Sometimes it's good to talk to people you don't know. But who? And How? Definitively not people from school or people that I usually am with. I can't face a person that knows my weakest spot, that would made me very vulnerable, i dont like that. Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted January 5, 2015 Share Posted January 5, 2015 Can't see a psychiatrist because to other people I'm Perfectly Happy. Nobody knows. I'm living with my dad and our relationship ain't that close... I got no one to talk with. But who? And How? Definitively not people from school or people that I usually am with. I can't face a person that knows my weakest spot, that would made me very vulnerable, i dont like that. Of course nobody knows if you don't tell them. I don't know who, I'm experiencing a breakup after a 3 year relationship. It's horrible but I know things will turn around one day. Link to post Share on other sites
Author w11gu Posted January 5, 2015 Author Share Posted January 5, 2015 Of course nobody knows if you don't tell them. I don't know who, I'm experiencing a breakup after a 3 year relationship. It's horrible but I know things will turn around one day. I guess I just need to find a way out of this alone. Link to post Share on other sites
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