Define: infatuation, being in love, loving someone and having a (strong) fondness for

[Justletgo]

Difficult questions, but very important ones because they are the definitions people use when juding if the relationship is (still) right for them.

 

1) What does infatuation mean to you?

2) How does this differ from being in love with someone?

3) And how does being in love someone differ from loving someone?

4) Finally how does 'loving' someone differ from having a (strong) fondness for?

 

If you only feel like answering ONE question, go ahead! The more answers and opinions the better.

 

I expect these definitions differ from person to person.

[preraph]

You're right. They differ from person to person. When I was young and falling in love, my girlfriends would tell me it wasn't really love, that it was just lust or infatuation -- and yet, 40 years later, me and those ones I fell for still have a friendly relationship, not in person usually, but just stay in touch and care about what happens to each other. They became friends for life. I call that real love. So for me, the hot passionate early love just turns into loving that person in one way or another for life. Yes, the type and intensity changes, but it changes even if you'd been married to someone for that long.

[me85]

Difficult questions, but very important ones because they are the definitions people use when juding if the relationship is (still) right for them.

 

1) What does infatuation mean to you?

2) How does this differ from being in love with someone?

3) And how does being in love someone differ from loving someone?

4) Finally how does 'loving' someone differ from having a (strong) fondness for?

 

If you only feel like answering ONE question, go ahead! The more answers and opinions the better.

 

I expect these definitions differ from person to person.

 

1)Ohhh he's hot, we have fun together...I like hanging out with him sometimes but there's no real emotional connection at all.

2) Emotional connection, intimacy, opening up completely...Love is giving someone the ability to destroy you but trusting them enough not to.

3)I love my friends...but can only be in love with someone whom I share much more than friendship with.

4)Having a strong fondness for, or loving someone and even just being infatuated with someone at first could possibly lead to falling in true majorly love with someone.

 

When it's really love, you just know. It is separate from all other feelings you feel for mere loved ones. It is a desire and an obsession to become one with that person (maybe already feeling like you are one with that person)...the need to share any and all emotions with that person...to dream with that person...to see that person through sickness and health, for better or worse.

[Tayken]

Your 3 & 4 have a similar parallel, so you might want to tidy that up a bit.

 

# 1

 

Infatuation is a static process characterized by an unrealistic expectation of blissful passion without positive growth and development. Characterized by a lack of trust, lack of loyalty, lack of commitment, lack of reciprocity, an infatuation is not necessarily foreplay for a love scenario. People, however, have many reasons for making commitments.

 

Most people are infatuated with their love partners to a certain degree. People who are in love think of their partners periodically when they are apart (some more than others). Men seem to be better, in general, in compartmentalizing their lives, thereby putting thoughts of loved ones aside until the mind is free to dwell on life. And yes, there are many exceptions and many ranges within the genders.

 

 

#2

 

Real love is a conscious choice that often employs the rational part of our brains. Some couples have a "free ride" in the early stages of their relationship where they experience the intense feelings characterized by romantic love, but not everyone. And these feelings certainly aren't necessary for real love to emerge as the relationship grows, as evidenced by the success rate of arranged marriages in other parts of the world. It's when the infatuation feelings diminish that the couple has to learn that love is a choice, not a feeling, as mentioned in

 

The Road less traveled

[sdrawkcaB ssA]

Difficult questions, but very important ones because they are the definitions people use when juding if the relationship is (still) right for them.

 

1) What does infatuation mean to you?

2) How does this differ from being in love with someone?

3) And how does being in love someone differ from loving someone?

4) Finally how does 'loving' someone differ from having a (strong) fondness for?

 

If you only feel like answering ONE question, go ahead! The more answers and opinions the better.

 

I expect these definitions differ from person to person.

 

1 - Always thinking of the other... like constantly.

2 - You feel addicted... You are, whether or not you know it.

3 - That is an odd question. Love is multifaceted, so many ways to love someone. Being in love, is like joy from the very wee bit of your heart on out to your hair and toes. Loving to me is caring and understanding them.

4 - Fondness is only one or two things. Like enjoying their humor, or looks. Loving goes beyond just a few things, you must enjoy who they are even if they have differences.

[chimpanA-2-chimpanZ]

1) Infatuation is the very earliest stage of love, when that indescribable spark triggers something in you. It's also inherently shallow because it's built on hope rather than experience. Since you only know a little about the person, your romantic imagination fills in the rest. He's perfect. He's amazing. He's dreamy. When he smiles at you your stomach drops. You cannot even imagine fighting with him because how could you ever fight with the perfect man?

 

2) Falling in love happens next. You want to be together all the time, you feed off each other's energy, and you begin to actually function as a couple. You discover how well you complement each other. You get a fuller picture of the person and you realize he's completely amazing, flaws and all. You begin to trust him. Yes, he does have some mannerisms that are irritating, but when he smiles at you your stomach still drops.

 

3) I'm really glad you distinguished "falling in love" and "loving someone", because they're two very distinct concepts for me. I think it would be appropriate to tell someone that you were falling in love with them after three months or so, but I would never say "I love you" until we'd been together at least six months, probably closer to eight. Truly loving someone means seeing them at their absolute worst as well as their best and still wanting to be with them more than anything. It also means being totally comfortable with expressing yourself around them, like saying "If you pop your gum one more time I'm going to throw you out the window."

 

4) This is tough. I feel like I love my friends more than the world, but there's obviously no romantic component there. I love my relatives, I even love my coworkers (granted, our office is really close). So where does a "strong fondness" become love? I don't know, but the appreciation of irritating habits plays into it somewhere. On a strictly romantic level I think it actually comes back to infatuation. You can really care for somebody and recognize they're a stand-up, grade-A guy who is just perfect on paper, but if he can't make your heart beat a little faster then I would say it isn't romantic love.

 

The New York Times asked elderly married couples to describe what love is. I remember one comment where a man said "Love is waking up and realizing how utterly devastated you would be without them in your life." It sounds sort of depressing, but I think it's true; if you can recover from a breakup in the course of a weekend, then it probably wasn't love either.