I don't feel as mentally sharp as I used to be

[elseaacych]

For those of you who follow some of my threads or posts on other threads, or don't... I went through a spat of depression earlier this year where it was all I could do to get up and go to class or whatnot, and completing reading assignments, and mentally processing things became slower, I became more easily distracted.

 

I didn't ever just give up, I would go to class and try to read assignments, and take what I could out of it, and learn. I did barely well enough to get by without being put on academic probation. After a decent summer of no class, just work (two jobs, one as a research assistant), I returned to school somewhat refreshed. 16 credit hours. I wrote on to my school's law journal.

 

Now, I am just overwhelmed, I don't feel like I can process all of the information that's being thrown at me, or that I don't have enough time to give my brain a break, so it takes breaks in the middle of my worktime... sometimes for hours. Many times, I've been unable to contribute to class discussion because I haven't gotten the reading assignment done, and I've been unable to come up with a well reasoned argument when asked to come up with one on the spot. I don't even know if I've been doing the work necessary to get by. And somehow the days just keep passing.

 

Anyway, now that you've made it through this incoherent ramble of feelings, do you have any recomendations? I don't feel as though I can articulate these feelings very well to a shrink (and, I don't have time to go), and I am on meds.

 

Everyone I've tried to talk to about how I am feeling tells me it's ridiculous to feel this way, that I've got the world by the horns. In reality, I do not.

[Mr Scorpio]

Anyway, now that you've made it through this incoherent ramble of feelings, do you have any recomendations?

 

That depends. Are you in law-school?

[elseaacych]

That depends. Are you in law-school?

That I am.

[GorillaTheater]

That I am.

 

Your thinking is going to be f*cked up for the rest of your life.

[sdrawkcaB ssA]

Take a sabbatical for a quarter.

 

I went to a private college for accelerated course work in engineering. Even though things did not go well, I found benefit.

 

I was about to pop my brain in the last half of completing my degree. Had my instructor fail me because he and I could not get along. Needless to say I was too distraught to fight, and sat through the same class with a different instructor. Yes, I had to pay extra for tuition as well, as the class changed to add extra requirements to the curriculum. That gave me a quarter's worth of sabbatical as all I did under instructors approval was to come in for tests and final exam. I recovered my thoughts and ended that quarter with an A.

 

Two things were done, I got a better instructor that I did not clash with, and time to recover. As an added bonus, I got upgraded in further training with the last half of the requirements had been updated as well. So, if I did challenge when I had failed, I would have not have graduated with the updated class work that went along with graduating 3 months late.

[GorillaTheater]

Okay, seriously, it sounds like some reverberations from the depression you suffered from earlier. Are you still being treated? Meds?

 

Law school is rough. I was married and working at the time (hell, our first kid was born between my first and second years). Those years are a blur. I don't know how the hell I managed to cope.

 

Make a list and focus on knocking out one item at a time. You can get through this. You're smart enough to be there in the first place, and talented enough to write onto law review.

[Mr Scorpio]

That depends. Are you in law-school?

 

I don't know what term you're in, but it is time for you to learn that you DON'T NEED to read all of those cases. You just need the IRAC or whatever acronym your school uses. Their is a whole industry dedicated to cranking out outlines and flashcards for law-students.

 

In fact, I still have ALL of my outlines, most of them purchased over the last two-years. PM me if you're interested in making a bulk purchase, I'll cut you a great rate.

 

And even IF you decide "no, I want to read 300 page a week", you're still going to need those outlines come bar exam time. I still don't know how the hell I passed that thing, especially in a state where a third of 1st time takers didn't.

Edited October 2, 2014 by Mr Scorpio

[pinkie]

Sounds like 'burnout' to me... taking some time off as someone mentioned above would make perfect sense (if you can) Otherwise, you run the risk of more suffering in other areas.. as you've already mentioned.. your work. Same thing happened to me, but unfortunately, I never returned to my studies. I think I waited too long (to take a much needed break) and it just got to me. Goodluck to you whatever you decide to do. It really takes a lot out of you to keep pushing forward, but sometimes you can catch a second wind.

[FitChick]

Learn to meditate to clear your mind.

[Leegh]

I think when our brains have too much to process, they get overwhelmed. I have noticed that my short-term memory is getting worse, as sometimes I can be thinking about something and then the next minute I forgot what I was thinking about. Do you think your meds are helping? Sometimes meds can have side effects, hopefully they are helping, but you may want to check to see what their side effects are. Also, cutting back or eliminating caffeine (if you drink coffee, etc.) can help a lot, as caffeine magnifies anxiety. I used to get heart palpations but they are fewer now that I have cut back on coffee.

[learning_slowly]

Also exercise helps to relieve the mind.

 

For instance, I had an amazing amount of work to do and had not been getting enough sleep; the last thing I wanted to do was workout.

I got there and there were loads of guys posing, which annoys me, but I just got into my lifting, and managed to keep up with the guys much bigger than me.

 

I finished and came out reinvigorated. I managed to get a lot more done the next day. Just to put this in to perspective, I did have a lot of alcohol the next night and still managed to crank out a lot of work.

 

But I think the exercise cleared my mind to let me do it. Sometimes something as basic as lifting,let's you see the problems never usually insurmountable and there's always more than one way to tackle a task.

[Zapbasket]

Hey, elseaacych.

 

Haven't had time to be on here the past couple of weeks and just came on looking for posts/threads by you. Sorry you're going through this; I've been there and the best thing I can say is that you just have to give yourself some slack.

 

To begin with, sometimes antidepressants can make people a bit mentally sluggish, and so maybe an appointment with your prescribing physician is in order, just to explain the issue and maybe adjust your meds.

 

But most important is that your mind takes a long time to heal from a major situational ("non-endogenous") depression. I'm in the same boat as you where I find myself unable to concentrate on things like reading (so I'm spending more time outdoors instead as I have that luxury) and feeling like I'm not as sharp as I usually am. Luckily for me, I'm not in school, and I can just imagine the pressure you feel. I went to grad school for literature, and had a lot of reading to get done, and when time is of the essence, sometimes you have to practice "strategic reading." Spend more time looking at the structure of your reading material before you dive in. ToC / the number of sections/sub-sections / etc. Be very conscious about sussing out the main line of argument in a piece of reading, and finding at least three major points the author elaborates in support of that argument. Go into a piece of reading with the aim of finding these elements rather than just reading from beginning to end. That way, you can skim parts without losing the essence. Also, when you know how an author structures his/her argument, your own logic can fill in the details (cause/effect) even if you haven't read all the details. This will help your ability to make meaningful class contributions even if you haven't read everything and it has the additional benefit of training your mind in the art of debate, which will help you with your papers and your development as an attorney.

 

Sorry this is so long. Above all, keep being KIND to yourself. Don't fool yourself into believing there is not time each day for you to decompress, feel your emotions, and rest your mind and spirit. It's CRUCIAL right now--as crucial as keeping on track in your studies (they go hand in hand). Little things, like driving somewhere to enjoy the sunset, or enjoying a healthy home-cooked meal, or taking time to play with a little child or pet a dog--all these things are balm to a distressed mind and heart.

 

HOpe this helps a bit?