Donut Posted March 8, 2005 Share Posted March 8, 2005 Ok, been six months since the split with the ex, accepted it's over but........ I sent him a cd-rw disc about 3 months ago to put our photo's on and send it back to me (he has them on his pc, i don't think he would have deleted them as he has photo's of other ex's). No personal contact involved, no huge effort, just would like our photo's to look back on, memories etc. We were together just shy of three years so of course I would like photo's of holidays we went on and such, happier times......nice memories to have! He hasn't bothered at all. Is he being petty? What the hell is wrong with doing this for me? I realise if I contact him again it could probably set me back on moving on, don't want to contact him really but there are some lovely photo's of me in that lot. I realise I should just let it go but I'm so sick of exe's having nice photo's of me and I don't have any!! Guess I'm just ranting but I really would like those photo's, and he still has some of my stuff too (books, shoes, etc) ! Rarrrrrrrr!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Spock Posted March 8, 2005 Share Posted March 8, 2005 People are generally lazy, and if you're broken up he's not really motivated to do stuff for you any more. Contact him, and set up a time where you can come over when he is home and pull out the pictures that you want. I don't blame you, I like holding on to nice pictures of me too. But don't take any of you and him. Anyone too lazy to do something that simple isn't worth using up the space on your hard drive. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donut Posted March 8, 2005 Author Share Posted March 8, 2005 I could contact him but I'm pretty sure he won't respond. He has ignored me so far. He dumped me over the phone, without much explanation and would not meet up, or let me pick up my things in person, so we could have a discussion about things, even just to get some closure! All I got was vague excuses and a few things in a box, brought over by his dad! He's 27 for christs sake! Acting like a little boy. Even his Mum couldn't believe how childish he was being. ( I spoke to her after the event, we were quite close towards the end ) A friend of mine has suggested sending another cd to him with a stamped addressed envelope to myself, with a short note just saying that I would like the pics. I'm very wary tho that he'll think I'm trying to open up contact (like I'm a stalker), which I am not and just ignore me again and keep the cd. I could never do this to someone I was close to, even if I didn't love them anymore. I would still meet up to answer any questions they may have and make it clear there was no chance of working things out, if there was none. And I'd give all their stuff back too, including any copies of photo's they may wish to have! This is very annoying but I can see I'm better off without the spineless a-hole. I'm still entitled to my keepsakes and the rest of my things tho! I guess I'm better off just letting it go and have a mental note with the next bf that I get copies of photo's at the time, rather than after things go wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donut Posted March 8, 2005 Author Share Posted March 8, 2005 Sorry if the previous post sounds angry, just venting my frustration! Link to post Share on other sites
Blessedman Posted March 8, 2005 Share Posted March 8, 2005 When my wife and i were dating, we broke up alot. One time we thought it was for good. Obviously not!! First it was bitter, then it slowly turned to rage, and leave me the hell alone. So what do we do with our stuff, I told her burn mine, she told me throw her's away. Of course we didnt, she wound up mailing my stuff, and I dropped hers off. The guy she dated after me was totaly different, he cheated on her, when she dumped him, he couldnt understand. Again she sent all of his stuff to him, he kept saying I will send you your stuff and never did. We even went as far as to send him a check to pay for the shipping. He never sent a thing. Your ex could be dealing with a couple issue's. 1 What have I done, I really like this girl. 2 If I keep the pics she will continue to keep in touch w/ me. 3 Im a pathetic loser, all I have to do is put the pics on a cd, and give it too her. Dont let it get to you, do like you said and start making copies from the get go in the next relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donut Posted March 8, 2005 Author Share Posted March 8, 2005 Thanks blessedman I think in his case he simply can't be bothered, it's downright rude and a mockery of the lovely relationship we had together, we got on really well (I thought). I've seen a side to him that I most certainly do not like, so I guess he did me a favour. Link to post Share on other sites
moon Posted March 9, 2005 Share Posted March 9, 2005 I am sure he's getting a lot of satisfaction knowing that he has your stuff and pictures. Seriously, I'd forget about it. Why don't you start carrying a camera around with you for the next month and take some new shots of family and friends. You'll have some new pictures, which might help you forget about those other ones. My guess is, when this guy does want to talk to you (sometime) his excuse will be the pictures. I think some people are just clumsy about other people's stuff anyway. I'd just maybe accept it's gone unless your ex realizes that this stuff isn't his to keep. But seriously, I'd just take the high ground on this one and write it off. Your pride and dignity is worth much more than the escalating anger and tension that will be caused by trying and trying to reclaim this stuff. That's one thing I have learned about breaking up. You've made your request to him, but you can't exactly force him to give them back. And I wouldn't even try. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donut Posted March 9, 2005 Author Share Posted March 9, 2005 Thanks moon, that's a great idea! I have a new camera phone so I'm just gonna zap away with that and get lot's of pics of people who really are there for me. My pride and dignity is now well restored after the months of grief and pain, I don't really fancy any more humiliation at his expense. It's just so sad that it all came to this, but I have to remember that I'm not the one who ended an important relationship in a really sh*tty way. Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted March 9, 2005 Share Posted March 9, 2005 Originally posted by Donut My pride and dignity is now well restored after the months of grief and pain, I don't really fancy any more humiliation at his expense. It's just so sad that it all came to this, but I have to remember that I'm not the one who ended an important relationship in a really sh*tty way. true ... I am proud of you Donut. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donut Posted March 9, 2005 Author Share Posted March 9, 2005 Thankyou Greenhorn. Link to post Share on other sites
prayformydownfall Posted March 9, 2005 Share Posted March 9, 2005 thats a good idea if iv ever heard one!! take pics of everyone who is worthy of your time and dont bother looking back. its a long road, look at the sign and see where your heading next!! i had a similar thing myself, my ex had items that i held important and were things that were significant to the time we spent together but they r only possessions... and memories of a past hurt, so who cares!!! keep the attitude youve got u deserve better and in time that person will find you pfmd Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted March 9, 2005 Share Posted March 9, 2005 Yeah now there are so many ways to make your online albums..so many tools to make the pics look better.,. make your album share them or make slide shows according to the ocassions.. Creative and interesting thing to do.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donut Posted March 9, 2005 Author Share Posted March 9, 2005 Yay! Link to post Share on other sites
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