Girlfriend cheated on vactation and gave head

[rikkert159753]

Ok so my girlfriend and I started a relationship almost 5 months ago now,

after 2 months our summervacation began,

I was 17 and she was 16 at that point,

She already had a vaction booked with a female friend of her to spain, like with other 16 year olds. Basically a party-holiday.

 

I had my vacation the same week as she did, so we went of vacation, the first few days she was still like texting, facetiming me etc. But she lost intrest like a couple days after, she never asked me what i did that day, she was never intrested or whatsoever, while before the vacation everything was really perfect, i couldn't imagine someone better than her, and i'm sure she also couldn't imagine someone better than me,

 

So the 6th day, from the 10 days, she actually "cheated" on me, the next day in the evening she told this to me, but she didn' tell the truth,:

she told me she was very drunk and kissed a guy outside the nightclub, only one kiss that evening.

I was just really pissed of because cheating is cheating, but eventually when we were home we talked it out and everything was normal again.

Except i didn't know she was withholding something. She didn't tell me the truth and she was already acting a little bit strange.

 

So 1 week ago (2 months after the cheating) she wanted to talk to me and she told me that she didn't only kiss him, she told me that she went with him to go sleeping, but first drop him off at his hotel, then he lost his card or whatever, so he couldn't acces his hotel, so she told me she let him sleep in their room, 2 beds put together and then my gf, her female friend and this guy.

 

She told me she went to sleep with clothes on etc.. and the day after she woke up and cried alot when she saw it and sent him away.. She felt really guilty and i do believe she has full regrets of what she did, she was so afraid that i would break up that she just didn't tell me.

 

So we talked about it and i forgave her.

Then 2 days after, i actually decided to talk to the guy, i msged him on fb, and asked him what actually happend if she kissed him multiple times,

so then he told me she also kissed him the next day (after the cheating, in a waterpark) and i told her and she had soo many regrets that she still lied etc,

she took pills and i was afraid shee was gonna commit suicide, she cut herself etc, and I am just soo pissed of,

Then the day AFTER i figured this out, the guy also told me she gave head to him, "but not for long, i didn't cum", i didn't believe it also she swore she didn't do it, she swore on her mother, father, etc

so i believed her, then she told her female friend from vacation "I told everything to my boyfriend,"

then she asked "also what happened in bed?"

my girl asked "What do you mean?" etc.. then she siad "if he'd know that he will break up so be sure he doesn't know"

then she told me this and she said i think it's true that i gave head to him but I really don't remember anything, she also slept without clothes etc only panties because she was on her period

 

I just really don't know what to do? is it even possible that you are SO drunk that you don't remember anything what you've done even not if they tell you what, but if you're that drunk, can you still even move to give head to another guy?

 

She is devestaded and i'm 100% sure she'll never do it again, she has so many regrets..

 

I just need answers

[Temporarilyinsane]

Yes, it's entirely possible to get so drunk you don't remember doing things, it's called blackout drunk. That itself is an issue though. You're young, move on.

[DrReplyInRhymes]

Once bitten, twice shy!

Take this lesson on the fly!

If she didn't think about this with respect to you,

then it's time to move on and find someone new!

[rikkert159753]

Yes, it's entirely possible to get so drunk you don't remember doing things, it's called blackout drunk. That itself is an issue though. You're young, move on.

 

Yes but if she was this drunk, she probably isn't able to walk or talk or whatever, she didn't even vomit,

if she was so drunk, she wouldn've been able to move her head down and up whil she was sucking his penis would she?

[rikkert159753]

Once bitten, twice shy!

Take this lesson on the fly!

If she didn't think about this with respect to you,

then it's time to move on and find someone new!

 

I don't want to move on, i feel so good when i'm with her, i really can't imagine someone else where i'd feel as good as i do with her,

I'm really scared to get depressed if i break up,

i'm 100% sure if i'd break up now, i would psychologically break, seriously and so would she she really loves me a lot, really really much

[Keenly]

I don't want to move on, i feel so good when i'm with her, i really can't imagine someone else where i'd feel as good as i do with her,

I'm really scared to get depressed if i break up,

i'm 100% sure if i'd break up now, i would psychologically break, seriously and so would she she really loves me a lot, really really much

 

Just remember that you said this when it happens again and you'll have no one to blame but yourself.

 

 

 

If she cared about you the way you care about her, she wouldn't have done that.

[Michelle ma Belle]

 

I just really don't know what to do? is it even possible that you are SO drunk that you don't remember anything what you've done even not if they tell you what, but if you're that drunk, can you still even move to give head to another guy?

 

She is devestaded and i'm 100% sure she'll never do it again, she has so many regrets..

 

I just need answers

 

And what kinds of answers are you looking for exactly? Because from what I can see the responses are or will be pretty unanimous.

 

She's shown herself as a cheater AND a liar. The fact that she tried to trickle bits and pieces of the truth without giving up the WHOLE truth until you confronted her was more to ease her conscious then about any real remorse.

 

How exactly do you know with 100% certainty that she will NEVER cheat again? That's a pretty bold statement you're making. I'm willing to bet that before this incident you would have bet your life on the exact same thing. Guess what? She did cheat. Alcohol be damned. Cheating is cheating PERIOD.

 

Just because you don't like the responses you're getting doesn't mean they're wrong.

[GorillaTheater]

Once bitten, twice shy!

Take this lesson on the fly!

If she didn't think about this with respect to you,

then it's time to move on and find someone new!

 

"We just kissed, Rikkert"

 

Translated from cheater-speak:

 

"Sucked like a black hole"

[lolablue17]

Hi.

 

1. For me, if my girlfriend was even think of inviting a guy to her hotel room??!! It's cheating. she wasn't totally drunk when she invited him to sleep at her room, right? So the cheating occurred while she was at least half sober.

 

2. "She was naked with him with only panties because of her period" - translation: the only reason she didn't have sex with him was her period.

 

3. You are sure she will never do it again. Close your eyes and be honest - Do you trust her if she is going to a vacation next month without you, but with other girls and guys? Is it OK with you if she is going next week for 10 days?

 

Allow me to guess... You will be pissed off. You will be afraid of her having fun with others, far away from you because you have experienced what she is capable of.

 

So If you find it hard to trust her going to another vacation now, when she is full of remorse and so afraid to lose you, How can you trust her in the future when the panic to lose you will be vague, and the new temptations will shine and glow?

 

Tell me - Was she drunk when she lied to you all this time?

 

If you decide to stay with her - Imagine her next vacation.

[rikkert159753]

Hi.

 

1. For me, if my girlfriend was even think of inviting a guy to her hotel room??!! It's cheating. she wasn't totally drunk when she invited him to sleep at her room, right? So the cheating occurred while she was at least half sober.

 

2. "She was naked with him with only panties because of her period" - translation: the only reason she didn't have sex with him was her period.

 

3. You are sure she will never do it again. Close your eyes and be honest - Do you trust her if she is going to a vacation next month without you, but with other girls and guys? Is it OK with you if she is going next week for 10 days?

 

Allow me to guess... You will be pissed off. You will be afraid of her having fun with others, far away from you because you have experienced what she is capable of.

 

So If you find it hard to trust her going to another vacation now, when she is full of remorse and so afraid to lose you, How can you trust her in the future when the panic to lose you will be vague, and the new temptations will shine and glow?

 

Tell me - Was she drunk when she lied to you all this time?

 

If you decide to stay with her - Imagine her next vacation.

 

She isn't going on any vacation without me anymore, i will always be there, this vacation was already planned BEFORE we started our relationshiop and coulnd't be canceled, from now on i will always be there with her, she even doesn't go to parties without me anymore or drink without me being there because she's afraid of herself doing it again.

[Michelle ma Belle]

She isn't going on any vacation without me anymore, i will always be there, this vacation was already planned BEFORE we started our relationshiop and coulnd't be canceled, from now on i will always be there with her, she even doesn't go to parties without me anymore or drink without me being there because she's afraid of herself doing it again.

 

So what you're saying is that as long as you're with her ALL THE TIME she will NEVER cheat on you again?

 

Sounds insanely exhausting not to mention naive if you ask me.

 

Good luck.

[veggirl]

She isn't going on any vacation without me anymore, i will always be there, this vacation was already planned BEFORE we started our relationshiop and coulnd't be canceled, from now on i will always be there with her, she even doesn't go to parties without me anymore or drink without me being there because she's afraid of herself doing it again.

 

So she needs a babysitter. Well that makes sense, she's only 16.

 

and btw, she doesn't drink without you because "she's afraid of herself doing it again" is PATHETIC. She can't control herself not to CHEAT ON YOU? Why are you wasting your time with this s.hit. God damn you're 17 years old and signing up for this stupid drama...you have a lot of BS and heartache ahead of you with this chick.

[ExpatInItaly]

I hate to burst your bubble OP, but she doesn't really love you. I know you're telling yourself this because her betrayal hurts, but her actions just don't coincide with her words. If she loved you so much, she never would have been sexually intimate with a guy who isn't you. You are both far too young to be dealing with such drama. Get rid of her - she is a cheater and liar and you very likely still don't know the whole truth. And she's devastated? Boo hoo. She didn't pause to think about your feelings when he had another guy's manhood in her mouth, did she?

 

P.S. Where on earth are this girl's parents? 16 and going on party-holidays abroad, alone?

[d0nnivain]

You are both young. She has very little self control. Whether she grows up to be a serial cheater or not may depend on how much maturing she does over the next several years but no matter how sorry she may be, she's untrustworthy at this point.

[lolablue17]

So what you're saying is that as long as you're with her ALL THE TIME she will NEVER cheat on you again?

 

Sounds insanely exhausting not to mention naive if you ask me.

 

Good luck.

 

Listen, This guy has his naivety and innocence. these are his assets and that's his charm.

 

5-10-15 years from now he will start gaining some experience and wisdom. BUT! simultaneously he will lose some of his innocence and charm.

 

What do you prefer? to be wise or naive? I'm not sure that naivety is so bad...

[drifter777]

You are way too young to get caught up in all this drama so just stop. If you want to date this chick then go ahead but be clear that its not exclusive. You are both free to see other people. Then go out and enjoy your youth and date lots of girls.

[Omei]

Read title didnt need to read further...

 

Dump her dump her dumper you are young and free find a nicer girl to spend your time with do not waste your youthful years trying to please a cheater.

 

Ps the suicide stuff is emotional blackmail to MAKE you stay in a cheaters relationship run as fast as you can far away.

 

If you stay with her expect to be lied to again also expect to be thrown out at some point her feelings for you are clearly just pretty words with no actions.

Edited October 8, 2014 by Omei

[Els]

Being drunk is not an excuse.

 

She betrayed your trust and tried to hide it. What more do you need to leave?

[DJRoberts]

If you love her I know it'll be difficult but you should leave her.

If she cheated on you, she obviously doesn't feel the same love towards you, otherwise she wouldn't have done it. No matter how drunk.

 

I think you need to move on and find someone who truly loves you and will never do anything to hurt you like that...

[No Limit]

As long as you are okay with her cheating on you whenever you're not around (she doesn't have to go on vacation to cheat on you, you know), have a nice time with her. Get tested for STDs on a regular basis though.

 

Oh, and by the way, there are girls your age that don't cheat.

And of course you're going to be a little bit sad for a while when you break up with her - but believe me, it's not going to feel any better when you stay on her side as her doormat only to be replaced by another guy that she's cheated with for a month or two before letting you go.

[smackie9]

She's 16, too young and inexperienced to be in a committed relationship. Obviously she isn't ready for it, and wants to explore more things in life. Let her go. She still just a kid with a lot of lessons to learn. And this goes for you too. You can't expect someone so young not to fall into situations such as this. You are best to stay single, have fun with other chicks, get your kicks and enjoy your youth. Life is too short to get emotionally tied up into crap like this. It's not worth it.

Edited October 8, 2014 by smackie9

[Spectre]

i'm 100% sure if i'd break up now, i would psychologically break, seriously and so would she she really loves me a lot, really really much

 

Dude, this girl sucked another guy off. She DOES NOT LOVE YOU one single bit.

[Spectre]

She's 16, too young and inexperienced to be in a committed relationship. Obviously she isn't ready for it, and wants to explore more things in life. Let her go. She still just a kid with a lot of lessons to learn. And this goes for you too. You can't expect someone so young not to fall into situations such as this. You are best to stay single, have fun with other chicks, get your kicks and enjoy your youth. Life is too short to get emotionally tied up into crap like this. It's not worth it.

 

I'm sorry, but I'm frankly shocked at some of what you just said. You are right about the whole "let her go" since yeah, this girl is a nasty cheater. You are wrong when you try to excuse this as her being just a kid, and you are especially wrong when you say you can't expect someone so young not to fall into situations like this.

 

Really, so you are saying you can't expect a 16 yr. old girl to not at one point cheat on her boyfriend via sucking some other dude off? I honestly don't get this mentality. This girl is 16 not 12. Is she still growing? Yeah, does she know right from wrong? Yes. Does she know you don't put another guys d*ck in your mouth if you have a boyfriend? Yeah.

 

You don't get to excuse this because she is young, because the fact is plenty of people made it through high school without cheating on the people they dated with random dudes they meet on vacation. This is not something normal 16 yr. old's do, this is just something the really trashy ones do. You realize you really did just make it sound like all women at this age cheat, right? I can't imagine that was your actual intent.

[Andy_K]

Yes but if she was this drunk, she probably isn't able to walk or talk or whatever, she didn't even vomit,

if she was so drunk, she wouldn've been able to move her head down and up whil she was sucking his penis would she?

 

Not at all. I can get completely blackout drunk (as in, no memory whatsoever) and yet still be perfectly lucid, coherent, and fairly well coordinated. Certainly capable of walking, running, or various sexual acts.

 

Anyway, this girl sounds like a real keeper

 

You already know what you should do, you just don't want to.

[Natsu21]

The girl had sex with another guy, in a hotel room, without you.

 

You staying shows her that you're so desperate to have a gf you'll take her bullcrap. What woman is going to be loyal if you don't punish her.

 

Jeez kid, you're still in high school. Find your testes and get to stepping, or else you'll deal with years of this crap when you get to be my age.