"I don't think their relationship will last because they are just too different"

[woopa]

"I don't think their relationship will last because they are just too different"

 

This is a judgement I have heard recently that is, honestly working me up a little bit because I disagree. However I want to here others opinions on this topic.

 

I believe this comment was made mainly in relation to personality traits, the idea being, an introverted person and a very extroverted person cannot last because they are just too different from one another. And that instead people that are very similar to each other will have lasting relationships that work or better relationships than those that are quite different.

 

My viewpoint is that it does not matter how different someone is personality wise or even in choice of hobbies and activities that they enjoy doing (although I do believe it can help having similar interests). I believe the most important thing is that people have similar values such as politically, morally and religiously. And that they agree with each other on life choices such as having children, where they want to live, getting married.

 

Please share your view on the importance of personality and similar interests on whether a relationship will last!

Edited October 8, 2014 by woopa

[Raena]

They say opposites attract, but I say that was originally attracts you together will be precisely what ends up repelling you from each other.

 

We are human and therefore each of us will be unique in some way but being compatible with each other doesn't mean you have to be exactly alike, just have enough in common to keep you together and it be worthwhile. If you are dealing with outgoing vs introvert. One or the other will have to adjust in some way.

 

Will it never work out? No that's not true. Ultimately, it depends on how well you communicate and work through differences.

[sdrawkcaB ssA]

It is not because of differences, it is a lack of understanding and acceptance. Having some sharded commonalities helps, but the true beauty peeps don't see on the outside, is how much they share between themselves. As both have taken parts of each others differences and made them a part of their ways.

[Arieswoman]

Woopa,

No-one knows the internal dynamics of other peoples' relationships, and what you see may not be the real picture.

 

Relationships work not just because of love, but because of tolerance, good communication, compromise, acceptance, willingness, forbearance and kindness towards each other.

 

Common interests and viewpoints help, but no-one wants to live with a clone of themselves. Ask yourself truthfully if you would like to live with yourself? I certainly wouldn't want to live with me !

 

Differences in taste, viewpoints and perceptions can give interest and new ideas to a relationship, as long as people aren't too inflexible in their position.

[LastAcorn99]

I believe the reason people get attracted to each other is varied! From what I’ve observed and experienced, what sustains a relationship is the shared values like you rightly mentioned, and being intentional about loving and accepting each other (despite any differences) without letting selfishness or ego get in the way. --LastAcorn99

[mightycpa]

As long as the introvert doesn't keep the extrovert from doing what they like to do... which generally involves people.

 

The fact is that you live in a social world. If you stay together long enough, then having friends, participating in couples activities, getting together with the friends of your kids' friends, getting involved with other people in their sports and all that stuff, THAT is where it can impact a relationship.

 

If the introvert can avoid cloistering themselves away, then it is probably just fine. But if the introvert is asocial, that will eventually make life very difficult for the extrovert.