HaNdGr3NaDe Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 (edited) Ok, my first post on anything like this so here it goes. Back in October of 2013 I met this girl off a dating website. We hit it off instantly. She was amazing and we hooked up that first date. We started seeing a lot more of each other and spending the night at each others houses. Everything was great until I started finding things out about her and her ex. Apparently her ex she was with for 3 years and had a kid together. He was abusive and she left him after he was sentenced to prison. I met with her about two months after she left him. However, I found out that the house and the car she was using was all in his name. So, I offered her to move in with me in my apartment after 6 months of being together. She got a new car and things were going great. Then we started fighting all the time. I was upset that she was still talking to guys she had slept with in the past via facebook and texting. When confronted she would always have some excuse for talking to them. Let me mention that she was just not simply talking to them she was telling them how she missed them and even explicit pictures. So I moved out. We split up for about two months or so. During which time she told me how she was pregnant with my child and even had an ultrasound done and sent it to me. Being the honest and nice guy I am, I move back into a house with her to make things work. She informed me one day while I was at work that she had a miscarriage. She sent me pictures of blood and everything. I came home immediately to be with her. We cried and moved on from that. Like an idiot last week I proposed to her in front of her entire family and friends. Yesterday, she left her phone at the house while she went to work. I think you know what happens next. I went through the phone and what I found was horrific! During our two months of splitting up and her telling me she was pregnant, she was sleeping around with everyone. She had pictures of naked guys and talking with her friends about how amazing they were in bed. She even had several "sugar daddies" that she was apparently engaged to and she pictures of rings from them. She had full on conversations with her friend about all the guys, the sleeping with them, how good they were and sending her pictures of them. Mind you these are the same guys she was talking to on facebook and texting earlier in our relationship. I confronted her about it and she denied that any of it was real. She told me that she was never pregnant and the ultrasound and the blood pictures she sent me were fake. That was the only honest thing I believe at this point. She stated that she was just talking smack with her friend. She stated that she only slept with one guy and was talking to others, but the sex and being engaged was not true. I guess, my main question in all this, is "what and where do I go with this now?" I mean, I have been pretty much the father to her child this whole time and all her friends know about her seeing other guys or they think she did and then let me propose to her. I am really upset and hurt by all this and I cant sleep. I could use some advice, any is helpful. Edited October 11, 2014 by HaNdGr3NaDe Link to post Share on other sites
giblesp Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 You did the right thing in getting away from her, but made a mistake by taking her back. Soon as someone is sending off porn pictures behind their partners back, its pretty much over. Break free of this girl man, and don't look back. She's bad news my friend. Enjoy your freedom, look forward to someone who has decency and morality. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CharlieFox Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 You should ask yourself: "Do I want to live in pain and misery my whole life ahead, or do I want to be happy" If you want to live in misery and being hurt constantly, and live in stress every single day, by all means, stay with her! Let her lie to you even more, let her hurt you. Let her **** up your life. If you want to live a happy life - move on. Move away as far as you can from this woman. Delete her number, delete her FB account, never look back! Save yourself and find someone sane who will treat you the way you should be treated. Link to post Share on other sites
Elle1975 Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 Hate to say it, but you're not the father of her child from another guy after a rocky year spent together. I don't doubt that you love the child. What you do next is you cut off all ties with psycho, and you start being more careful in your future relationships. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
umirano Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 A girl that sends you fake ultrasound pictures and heartbeat charts is not dateable. I think. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 You are dealing with an unstable, unwell person. She is not relationship material whatsoever. She is a master maipulator and horrible liar, and you probably only know the half of it. For your own well-being, you need to stay away from her. Forever. And if you've not been using protection, get yourself tested right away. What does she do for work, by the way? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author HaNdGr3NaDe Posted October 12, 2014 Author Share Posted October 12, 2014 Thank you so much!! Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 You should have ran the min she told you about her ex. The red flags were everywhere, dude seriously you don't need to ask a bunch of strangers.......just RUN! Forest RUN! Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 Here's a tip: don't believe what they tell you about their ex. I bet money the majority was made up so you would feel sorry for her. She is a loser. Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 Shes a psycho crazy loony bitch!!! You run away and never ever speak to her again that's what you do. And try not to let it ruin your trust for future girls most of us do not go to that extreme case of crazy. Link to post Share on other sites
Dork Vader Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 Okay so this woman has some serious mental issues going on. I have some serious mental issues and this woman scares me. That should say a lot as I'm OCD possibly OCPD. Lying about being pregnant and lying about having a miscarriage is complete garbage. Maybe she was desperate to get you back, but there are plenty of other forms of desperation. It does not matter if she slept with all or none of them. It is intent that matters. She did have sexual relations with them via text/social media. That is NO different then sleeping with them. The only thing missing is the physical contact. Move on and find someone that respects you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 O I confronted her about it and she denied that any of it was real. She told me that she was never pregnant and the ultrasound and the blood pictures she sent me were fake. I guess, my main question in all this, is "what and where do I go with this now?" Are you seriously asking this question? You break up with her. YESTERDAY. And you know what, I am going to disregard MOST of the evidence against her. Forget about all of the cheating, all of the side shows, all of the additional drama. Look at what I highlighted up there. Not only did she fake a pregnancy, but she faked an ultrasound. This is NOT a mentally healthy woman. You run, you run FAR away from her and you never talk to her again. Hell, let her keep the ring, if need be, but the less you talk to this harpy, the better off you will be. Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 Ok, my first post on anything like this so here it goes. Back in October of 2013 I met this girl off a dating website. We hit it off instantly. She was amazing and we hooked up that first date. We started seeing a lot more of each other and spending the night at each others houses. Everything was great until I started finding things out about her and her ex. Apparently her ex she was with for 3 years and had a kid together. He was abusive and she left him after he was sentenced to prison. I met with her about two months after she left him. However, I found out that the house and the car she was using was all in his name. So, I offered her to move in with me in my apartment after 6 months of being together. She got a new car and things were going great. Then we started fighting all the time. I was upset that she was still talking to guys she had slept with in the past via facebook and texting. When confronted she would always have some excuse for talking to them. Let me mention that she was just not simply talking to them she was telling them how she missed them and even explicit pictures. So I moved out. We split up for about two months or so. During which time she told me how she was pregnant with my child and even had an ultrasound done and sent it to me. Being the honest and nice guy I am, I move back into a house with her to make things work. She informed me one day while I was at work that she had a miscarriage. She sent me pictures of blood and everything. I came home immediately to be with her. We cried and moved on from that. Like an idiot last week I proposed to her in front of her entire family and friends. Yesterday, she left her phone at the house while she went to work. I think you know what happens next. I went through the phone and what I found was horrific! During our two months of splitting up and her telling me she was pregnant, she was sleeping around with everyone. She had pictures of naked guys and talking with her friends about how amazing they were in bed. She even had several "sugar daddies" that she was apparently engaged to and she pictures of rings from them. She had full on conversations with her friend about all the guys, the sleeping with them, how good they were and sending her pictures of them. Mind you these are the same guys she was talking to on facebook and texting earlier in our relationship. I confronted her about it and she denied that any of it was real. She told me that she was never pregnant and the ultrasound and the blood pictures she sent me were fake. That was the only honest thing I believe at this point. She stated that she was just talking smack with her friend. She stated that she only slept with one guy and was talking to others, but the sex and being engaged was not true. I guess, my main question in all this, is "what and where do I go with this now?" I mean, I have been pretty much the father to her child this whole time and all her friends know about her seeing other guys or they think she did and then let me propose to her. I am really upset and hurt by all this and I cant sleep. I could use some advice, any is helpful. No need for me to read past the first post. You dodged a bullet. Be happy. Don't stand there waiting for more. Run! Forest Run! Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 (edited) Umm..she admits to you she lied about a miscarriage and all that and..you do not leave immediately? She says she was just "joking" in those messages you read? Right, don't believe the nonsense. Who has full conversations with their friends about men they slept with..but did not truly sleep with? This girl is playing you, while you were broken up she became the town bike and gave everyone a ride, probably some people got to ride twice. You proposed to her, did she say yes? If so, GET THE RING BACK! Get it back now, as in right now. Also get this horrible woman out of your life. Her just sleeping around after you moved out is enough already. You are upset she is talking to guys she used to bang and won't stop, and rightfully so. So you move out and instead of maybe changing her ways and trying to get you to see she does care..she begins sleeping around. Yeah, that is not love. But the faking the pregnancy thing is just plain scary, while the other stuff is more just trashy skanky stuff. Seriously though here merely sending pictures to other guys she used to screw and telling them she missed them? That is already behavior worthy of never speaking to her again. As for her kid, it sucks but he is not your kid and you are not his father. If he wonders why you are not in his life anymore you can simply tell him to blame his mother. It would be awesome if you did that, but I am doubting you would since most would not. But I still say: don't stick around because you bonded with her kid. He/she is not worth staying with this horrible person. Maybe when the kid gets older you can explain to him why you had to leave, but don't make the kid a reason to stay..even though if you know yes in his future he is going to be destined to have a lot of "uncles". You need to not only get your ring back from this woman if you gave her one, but you need to dump her. Frankly, you need to get your stuff and move out and NEVER speak to her again. Never speak to any of her charming friends either who can sit there and watch you make a fool of yourself. Though they are her friends so I doubt it will be hard on you to not do that. But yeah, get this woman out of your life permanently as soon as you can. Seriously, this time tomorrow I hope to see a post from you about how you have dumped her and are in the process of moving out. Edited October 12, 2014 by Spectre Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Dude, get on your hands and knees, and whatever god you pray to, thank him from the bottom of your heart that you found out before marrying her. Buy a new pair a track shoes and.. RUN!! Seriously, all joking aside, as much as it hurts you're not her child's father, be realistic and cut the cord before committing a marriage and years of taking care of her before the mother does something psycho again and leaves. If you think her friends can cover for her now, do you think they would tell you what she's up to once you've married? Break up with her, you'll be patting yourself on the back for dodging a bullet. Link to post Share on other sites
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