boilingpoint Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 (edited) So yeah... I don't feel bad about it - just want to gage people's opinions on the matter. I generally don't like fighting and lost all the fist fights I had in school so it's something I like to avoid even when someone angers me. My track record against aggressive people bothers me though. I was standing on a section of lowered pavement by the bus stop using my phone and this guy in a 4x4 beeps at me. I look up and he's telling me to get out of the way. I can immediately tell the guys a wanker so just look at him and don't move. He then revs his engine drives into me with his car so I have to push myself off the bonnet to get out of the way. I then kicked the side of his car hard and he stopped. There was a big crowd nearby and hear someone say that I'm 'gonna get a spanking' and the guy gets out and charges towards me... said **** this and ran. He was black, looked quite hard and with a similar build to me but taller I think. Anyway I had to run through crowds of people in London and knocked over a woman. He was pretty fit because he kept up with me for a while before I lost him. I think I did well not to stick around to find out if the guy was all bark and no bite though. He just looked like another loser so I think it is wise to pick your battles here... except if I was in that situation again I'd probably try standing my ground and throwing a punch. When someone is being an ******* like that I think it's ok to defend yourself by striking first. Next time I'll aim for the nose and hit as hard as I can. Always then have the option to leg it if things don't go to plan... What you reckon? Edited October 11, 2014 by boilingpoint 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LoneIsland Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 You damaged his car, and he's gonna flatten your face. If I were you I'd stop going to that bus stop for a while. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author boilingpoint Posted October 11, 2014 Author Share Posted October 11, 2014 You damaged his car, and he's gonna flatten your face. If I were you I'd stop going to that bus stop for a while. No, I like to avoid fights but I don't like to give in to intimidation. If I was in that situation again I'd think it's OK to at least try to break his nose. Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 Fighting is not the answer to anything.Their is crazy people out there that will do more then use a fist.Best to stay away from the possibility of being more then punched. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
M30USA Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 Fighting is not the answer to anything.Their is crazy people out there that will do more then use a fist.Best to stay away from the possibility of being more then punched. Yep. And just remember that Bruce Lee walked away or evaded fights when he could help it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
lollipopspot Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 I would have given you praise for not engaging with a jerk, but then I saw that you were a bit of one yourself. You shouldn't have kicked the guy's car, because his reaction was fairly predictable. Or if you're going to get into it like that, then stay and finish it - because what you did ended up possibly getting someone in the crowd hurt. You knocked someone down. We don't know anything about her and the effect on her. You could easily have stepped on a small dog or kicked over a baby carriage, or say the woman you knocked down had been holding a baby or a pet, they could have died. Or an old (or sometimes not so old) person could have broken a hip or knee when they got knocked down. When you run through a crowd endangering people because of a confrontation you contributed to, you're part of it. And in the states, you could be shot. 9 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 I would have given you praise for not engaging with a jerk, but then I saw that you were a bit of one yourself. You shouldn't have kicked the guy's car, because his reaction was fairly predictable. Or if you're going to get into it like that, then stay and finish it - because what you did ended up possibly getting someone in the crowd hurt. You knocked someone down. We don't know anything about her and the effect on her. You could easily have stepped on a small dog or kicked over a baby carriage, or say the woman you knocked down had been holding a baby or a pet, they could have died. Or an old (or sometimes not so old) person could have broken a hip or knee when they got knocked down. When you run through a crowd endangering people because of a confrontation you contributed to, you're part of it. And in the states, you could be shot. That's 100% accurate -- especially in bad neighborhoods by gang members, thugs or even police. Happens all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author boilingpoint Posted October 11, 2014 Author Share Posted October 11, 2014 I would have given you praise for not engaging with a jerk, but then I saw that you were a bit of one yourself. You shouldn't have kicked the guy's car, because his reaction was fairly predictable. Or if you're going to get into it like that, then stay and finish it - because what you did ended up possibly getting someone in the crowd hurt. You knocked someone down. We don't know anything about her and the effect on her. You could easily have stepped on a small dog or kicked over a baby carriage, or say the woman you knocked down had been holding a baby or a pet, they could have died. Or an old (or sometimes not so old) person could have broken a hip or knee when they got knocked down. When you run through a crowd endangering people because of a confrontation you contributed to, you're part of it. And in the states, you could be shot. Look obviously I'm not gonna get everyone's approval here but when I crashed into that woman, it was an accident. I tried holding her, breaking her fall and I also apologised before running off again... so no I'm not a jerk actually but I do treat jerks like jerks. They deserve it. Yes, I probably would have been shot 5 times over by now if I lived in the states - you guys are crazy with your guns... I did almost get run over though. I think it's important not to take people's crap when human conflict happens - yes walking away seems like a mature choice but then I wouldn't have got the satisfaction of kicking his car... Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Scorpio Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 Avoiding a fight is good, as even one well placed punch could crack your orbital bones or nose and leave you with headaches for a longtime. That being said, why didn't you just get out of the way? I'm assuming that if he hit you with his vehicle that you were in the way of traffic? If you do decide to stick around next time something like this happens, remember the power of the head-butt. Quick way to end a fight. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
dichotomy Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 (edited) I recently started MMA training (street kind not cage kind). I have read several "real world" studies and book on self defense, and real world violence (hey what can I say? its a new hobby and therapy for me:o) Anyway the books and instructors are very clear on the dangers of fighting and when to avoid them (which is most of the time). It really should be self defense when there is no option for you, or to protect the innocent. Several people have commented on the damage that can be done to you - from fists, to gun to knife. Sometimes a guy wants to beat you up a bit, others want to damage permanently or kill you. But there is somehting brought up by my books and instructors - the other side - what if you "win"? What if that guy got out of his car - after you kicked it, and you got some skills - and connected with a really good hit as he was approaching - and he went down - hard - cracking his skull on the concrete - getting brain damage or face altering damage or death? In the United States - thanks to the crowd witness in particular - your going to get sued - or put on trial for criminal assault. Loose you home, car, bank accounts, go to jail maybe, never see your family for a long while, rest of your life f;ed up. No avoid fights were ever possible, there are some very good rules (wont go into them here) on when and how to get into a fight to protect youself physically and legally. Another thing having been getting training and light sparing with fellow students, size or muscles may have little to do at with ability to take you out. I dwarf many of my instructors, and some have a pot belly, and they could take me out in 3 seconds on the street. You never know the skills some guy (big or small) has on you. Another reason to avoid a fight. I think maybe you really had some skills in fighting - knew you had a good chance maybe with some guys - you would have simply smiled and shrugged your shoulders to his swearing.. not done anything to rile him up...and moved out of the way, and not felt bad at all about avoiding a jerk. Edited October 11, 2014 by dichotomy Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 Why and how were you standing in the way of a vehicle? On your phone!? Why didn't you get out of the way when you realized you were in the way? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
dichotomy Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 P.S. Avoiding any blame games for how this started, yes you should have run and if I was standing next to you I would have told you to. Link to post Share on other sites
Author boilingpoint Posted October 11, 2014 Author Share Posted October 11, 2014 Avoiding a fight is good, as even one well placed punch could crack your orbital bones or nose and leave you with headaches for a longtime. That being said, why didn't you just get out of the way? I'm assuming that if he hit you with his vehicle that you were in the way of traffic? If you do decide to stick around next time something like this happens, remember the power of the head-butt. Quick way to end a fight. It was on a sort of loading bay lowered curb next to the bus stop, so as far as I was concerned I was on the pavement. Also he was in a normal car so I didn't see why I should move. I mean it's an ego thing ultimately. I didn't want to get out of the way and he drove into me so the natural thing was for it to escalate into a fight. Unless the guy is armed I'll stand and fight next time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author boilingpoint Posted October 11, 2014 Author Share Posted October 11, 2014 I think maybe you really had some skills in fighting - knew you had a good chance maybe with some guys - you would have simply smiled and shrugged your shoulders to his swearing.. not done anything to rile him up...and moved out of the way, and not felt bad at all about avoiding a jerk. Ideally yeah, having nothing to prove and just knowing that you don't need to engage with a dickhead is great. But screw it, I still think it's important not to take any crap and that sort of behaviour bothers me. I've actually looked into MMA or boxing classes near my area and there aren't really any one around. Hopefully when I move more centrally there will be one. Thanks to all. Link to post Share on other sites
JDPT Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 I think the last time I was in a fight I was in high school which was a very long time ago. I've been carried out of clubs by gorillas for being an instigator, bad times in my life. I've grown and calmed down so much. I'm way more rational and try to gauge each situation individually. However, I don't think it was necessary to kick the guys car, I don't know I wasn't there. Where you having a bad day. I tend to instigate others when in a bad mood so they can engage me, it's something I need to work on. Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 (edited) Sounds like you created the whole problem. Standing in the way of traffic. Why would someone even have to ask you to move out of the way so they can drive through? Every step of the way, you were the problem. By your own admission. I am sure reality, you were even more of an ass. You cause problems, you get problems I was standing on a section of lowered pavement by the bus stop using my phone and this guy in a 4x4 beeps at me. I look up and he's telling me to get out of the way. I can immediately tell the guys a wanker so just look at him and don't move.Stand up to intimidation? Break the guy's nose if you see him again? Right, in your day dreams maybe. Just try not to block other people trying to go about their day the next time, unless they're a little girl that you can act like an ass towards and not worry about getting what you deserve. Edited October 12, 2014 by Imported 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Author boilingpoint Posted October 12, 2014 Author Share Posted October 12, 2014 Sounds like you created the whole problem. Standing in the way of traffic. Why would someone even have to ask you to move out of the way so they can drive through? Every step of the way, you were the problem. By your own admission. I am sure reality, you were even more of an ass. You cause problems, you get problems Stand up to intimidation? Break the guy's nose if you see him again? Right, in your day dreams maybe. Just try not to block other people trying to go about their day the next time, unless they're a little girl that you can act like an ass towards and not worry about getting what you deserve. Actually, no. What I described is pretty much exactly what happened. Feeling the love in your post by the way. Not trying to be macho here although I admit the episode was a ego thing. Just sharing my thoughts and experiences... Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 So, the obvious answer is that when someone in a vehicle needs you to step out of the way, you take the 2-3 steps and move out of the way. Human vs Vehicle, the vehicle will always win. I don't care how much of a wanker you think a guy is, if you don't wanna get hit by a car, you move out of the way of the car. Simple. I hope you didn't hurt the woman you knocked over. What if she was pregnant? All this because you wouldn't just take a few steps back and not kick someone's vehicle. Seems so over the top for no reason. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 Know when to hold 'em know when to fold 'em. You needed to fold em and deal with it. Its more alarming that you carry no remorse for this incident in its entirety. That is a sign of self-ishness verses self preservation. The gent who ran after you was no less at fault for engaging as he did. Neither of you get the humanitarian award for civility. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Purepony Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 The guy made a mistake he's admiting it so get off his back! Your all coming off with what if the woman was pregnant what is she broke a bone!? What if what if!?!? Its a mistake don't jump on the guy because he's bring responsible and sharing his experience I know.scumbags who drive big trucks and think they own the road too so I can see why he did Link to post Share on other sites
WomenWubber Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 You picked the wrong fight. Your instincts saved you this time. Lucky one you are. Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 There's easier ways to get a guys attention. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
umirano Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 1) Cars do NOT have priority over pedestrians. Their drivers need to be careful and drive their vehicle in a way as to not endanger anyone else. As a corollary you cannot intentionally drive into someone, even if he blocks your way. Assault / causing physical harm is the bigger crime than blocking someone. As a general rule: Pedestrian > Cyclist > Car > Truck. 2) Banging against the car door was probably unnecessary but hardly "damaged" the car. Assaulting someone over property damage is usually prosecuted as excessive use of force. 3) OP, if you get into physical fights with generally non-satisfying outcomes, or if you feel that you're (too often) the target of physical attacks, you should consider learning self defense. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 1) Cars do NOT have priority over pedestrians. Their drivers need to be careful and drive their vehicle in a way as to not endanger anyone else. Depends where you are, some places cars DO have right of way. Some places pedestrians do. Some places bikes do. Depends. All I know is that regardless of right of way, I think a car needing to drive somewhere takes "priority" over OP just standing there fiddling with his phone. I was raised to never trust that a moving vehicle will stop, or not hit you. Why gamble your safety with a 2 ton hunk of metal on wheels, especially when you have no idea who's behind the wheel. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 i run from fights wherever and whenever i can ....i hate fighting.....if i cant escape or someone else cant escape i stand and fight.....i fight first by trying to diffuse the situation with communication or talk my way out of it...... it's not being a coward to run i feel it is more cowardly to start a fight......i wouldnt have kicked or hit the car that is me though......most people get angry when people do that to their cars...i would have known by the way eh was ....that he was an aggressive person and a possible threat and avoidance would have been my option from the beginning...it doesnt make you a coward to run...but next time if there is a next time dont be aggressive with aggressors...to set them off........deb Link to post Share on other sites
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