star_shooter Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Hi All Why do (certain) women have such high standards when dating? Also, how do you date them? How do you keep them? When a woman has very high standards; how do you get to date them? How do you keep them? Thank you All Link to post Share on other sites
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 High standards... you mean personal or in how well off you made yourself in life??? If you are well off in life, it is a circle thing... what you bring to the table. If it is personal, then you must compare every aspect of who you want to date and make sure you match or better them. As they will compare you to themselves. That simple. Usually a woman with high standards will come across you if you meet their experience factor. Once you show who you are, that can be your down fall as you have no clue what she is after. You can always lower your standards but it is impossible to heighten them at will. That is why they will drop you once that is found out. Sometimes being honest in what you are has better merit than being too confident. As many men who are of high standards seem too confident, as no relationship needs power plays against each other. Most women find overly confident men trouble. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 What are considered high standards? It can mean different things to different people. Some people think high standards are about looks preferences and for others it's about a whole package and for others it's something else. You fit someone's standards or you don't, be the standard high or low. A woman who has high standards won't choose to be with a man who does not fit them so if you're dating such a woman, you already fit it or seem promising at least and if she passes you by, it is for the better, as the whole point of dating is to date people for whom you're a match. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayken Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 What are considered high standards? @OP.....Yes indeed please elaborate. If we are talking a woman who is expecting: - honesty/sincerity/transparency - respect - good work ethics - active man - well educated (university level and beyond) - intelligence - etc Then to me those are NOT high standards at all. I will expect her to be able to match all that as well. When it comes to OLD, I usually gravitate towards the above type of women anyway, as am NOT one to be intimidated. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 (edited) Hi All When a woman has very high standards; how do you get to date them? How do you keep them? Meet their standards. Edited October 13, 2014 by normal person 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Trane Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 I don't date women with high standards. If she thinks she's too good for me or not in her so called "league of extraordinary women," she's not worth the pleasure that I can give her. Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 star_shooter, what do you mean by "high standards" ? (My ex-husband told me that one of the reasons he cheated on me was because "he couldn't live up to my high standards". He didn't elaborate on this, so I took it as another example of his muddled thinking) "High standards" could me anything to anyone, so it would help if you could say more... AW Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 star_shooter, what do you mean by "high standards" ? (My ex-husband told me that one of the reasons he cheated on me was because "he couldn't live up to my high standards". He didn't elaborate on this, so I took it as another example of his muddled thinking) "High standards" could me anything to anyone, so it would help if you could say more... AW Generally, 'woman with high standards' = 'bitch who wasn't attracted to me' sadly. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 What is considered "high standard"? A man with a pulse? If that's the case, I'm not sure I can meet these women's criteria. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Probably best NOT to date them, and pursue women with reasonable standards. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Why do (certain) women have such high standards when dating? Trust me not all of them do. Read around and you will see some of them have very low standards. Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Probably best NOT to date them, and pursue women with reasonable standards. Just because someone has high standards doesn't mean those standards are unreasonable. "That doctor won't go out with you just because you're unemployed, have no direction in life, and live in your parents' basement? Psh! Her loss!" "A Victoria's Secret model won't date a guy who works at McDonalds? The guy has a job. What more does she want? What a stuck up brat -- her standards are way too high." You see what I'm saying? Everyone has a right to have standards and preferences. If they're unattainable then the person will get taken down a few pegs. If they're reasonable, the person will get what they want. What I don't like is people saying others who have preferences or different expectations is wrong. People who work hard to be who they are aren't likely to settle for someone who's phoned it in their whole life. Disliking people for that is just bitterness. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayken Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 "A Victoria's Secret model won't date a guy who works at McDonalds? The guy has a job. What more does she want? What a stuck up brat -- her standards are way too high." You see what I'm saying? Everyone has a right to have standards and preferences. If they're unattainable then the person will get taken down a few pegs. If they're reasonable, the person will get what they want. Splendid! As for the model that won't date the Burger flipper (who might be working on his on/her PhD by the way), she might have a valid point. I mean consider the worst case scenario...she is earning 10000s dollars per month, and then they split a few years after. She will have to pay him alimony. Th same applies to the Doctor. Why on earth should I hook up with a walmart greeter, coffee shop / grocery store worker, secretary, admin assistance as a high earner? She will have to bring more to the table that I can't find elsewhere for it to be worth my while and no sex is not it. Link to post Share on other sites
Natsu21 Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Just because someone has high standards doesn't mean those standards are unreasonable. "That doctor won't go out with you just because you're unemployed, have no direction in life, and live in your parents' basement? Psh! Her loss!" "A Victoria's Secret model won't date a guy who works at McDonalds? The guy has a job. What more does she want? What a stuck up brat -- her standards are way too high." You see what I'm saying? Everyone has a right to have standards and preferences. If they're unattainable then the person will get taken down a few pegs. If they're reasonable, the person will get what they want. What I don't like is people saying others who have preferences or different expectations is wrong. People who work hard to be who they are aren't likely to settle for someone who's phoned it in their whole life. Disliking people for that is just bitterness. If a woman's standards are too high, that's on her. Point is, never pursue a woman who clearly states standards that you don't fit. Trust me when I say you do fit someone's standards. Sides, it's hypocritical to say that a woman has high standards. Don't you have standards yourself? For instance...I refuse to date country women or ghetto women. That's my standard. Most girls I've known refuse to date poor guy, black guys, or short guys. But I've had gfs before, so obviously it isn't the entire female population. Find what works with you and use it to your advantage and stop with the entitlement attitude. You might be happier in the long run once you lessen you cares about what others think. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Just because someone has high standards doesn't mean those standards are unreasonable. "That doctor won't go out with you just because you're unemployed, have no direction in life, and live in your parents' basement? Psh! Her loss!" "A Victoria's Secret model won't date a guy who works at McDonalds? The guy has a job. What more does she want? What a stuck up brat -- her standards are way too high." You see what I'm saying? Everyone has a right to have standards and preferences. If they're unattainable then the person will get taken down a few pegs. If they're reasonable, the person will get what they want. What I don't like is people saying others who have preferences or different expectations is wrong. People who work hard to be who they are aren't likely to settle for someone who's phoned it in their whole life. Disliking people for that is just bitterness. My post was made with the assumption that if someone has to come here and post, asking HOW to date someone with a particular type of standards, that those standards he is referring to are likely extremely difficult. I doubt the OP would be asking the question, if it were referring to people with standards that are simply realistic to their own lifestyle. Of course our neurosurgeon probably won't be dating the janitor. I'm guessing this thread is Moreso about the unrealistically high standards that your average person has, wanting and expecting perfection from a partner, and how the OP can date a person with such stringent expectations. My advice, simply, is to not date those people. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 @OP.....Yes indeed please elaborate. If we are talking a woman who is expecting: - honesty/sincerity/transparency - respect - good work ethics - active man - well educated (university level and beyond) - intelligence - etc Then to me those are NOT high standards at all. I will expect her to be able to match all that as well. When it comes to OLD, I usually gravitate towards the above type of women anyway, as am NOT one to be intimidated. Don’t think of them as being high or low standards. Think of them as points of compatibility. This list above is a great example, because it's mostly judgement neutral. These are just things that are important to some people and not to others. Date someone that you admire and appreciate and who admires you and appreciates you. A really common trait that people use in OLD is "laid back." Some see that as positive and some see it as negative. Try to apply the same perspective toward all traits and try not to worry about judging what is high, low, reasonable or unreasonable. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Point is, you've gotta know the difference between standards that are necessary for a specific lifestyle, such as those with professional careers, etc. and the standards of an average person who is just being ridiculous. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts