Trying to date a busy girl

[somedude81]

I think people find it curious why you blame your height or your looks, but don't seem to recognize that age is important, too. Especially when you are looking to date girls ten years younger than yourself. You're making things so much harder on yourself.

 

I also saw those pictures you had up, and my first reaction to them was that you are far better looking than you think you are, but also much older looking than you think you are.

 

This is why I don't recognize the imortance of age.

 

Have you ever been in a scenario where you asked out a girl who was your peer? Did you ask out high school girls when you were in high school? Did you ask out 18-19 year old girls when you were 18-19? Did you ask out 20-21 year old girls when you were 20-21? Etc...

 

Of course I did.

 

I actually didn't start going after younger women until I was in my mid 20's.

 

All throughout jr. high and high school I only pursued girls who were in the same grade as me. My first two years of college I only pursued girls that were also in college.

 

Then I took a break from college and just worked for a few years. When I went back to school around 25, all the girls were obviously still college age.

 

Since it's been taking me a ridiculously long time to get through college, the girls I'm interacting with are still the same relative age, yet I'm getting older.

 

Up until my mid 20's I was very awkward with girls. Every girl I asked or expressed an interest in rejected me.

 

Eventually I figured out how to make friends with girls and just now I feel like I'm learning how to date them.

 

Even when I was age appropriate, I was still getting shot down. So my age wasn't an issue.

[sid3]

 

Even when I was age appropriate, I was still getting shot down. So my age wasn't an issue.

 

Having read some of this and your other threads, I have to question just what do you see wrong in the women within your age group.

[TigerLilly78]

Im sorry but from the way he posts I always thought OP was a very young adult 19 21ish im surprised to hear hes 33. My guess he wants to continue living as a young adult why? I dont know to me your 30s aren't a bad time in life cause they usually bring stability/respect/wisdom and a cirtin level of comfort that isn't always there before hand. *shrugs* anyways until he accepts that his age is prob a real issue for a good 90% of the women hes aiming for hes not going to have much luck imo anyways..

[somedude81]

Having read some of this and your other threads, I have to question just what do you see wrong in the women within your age group.

 

They were never attracted to me.

 

Either it was my appearance or it was the way I talked and flirted. And now people are tying to say it that it's all about my age, as if those things are fixed now.

[Lani]

They were never attracted to me.

 

Either it was my appearance or it was the way I talked and flirted. And now people are tying to say it that it's all about my age, as if those things are fixed now.

 

I don't think anyone is saying that, actually.

 

I'm interested to know what happens 5 years from now?

Eventually you're going to have to change your target age range, and, well, those women are only going to get older as you do.

Would you not be better setting your sights on women closer to your age NOW before they get 'too old'? If you bump your age limit up 5 years in 5 years time, you're still chasing the same demographic essentially.

[TigerLilly78]

They were never attracted to me.

 

Either it was my appearance or it was the way I talked and flirted. And now people are tying to say it that it's all about my age, as if those things are fixed now.

 

Your not getting what people are trying to say are you? yes it is about your age when it comes to dateing most younger women when I was 20-21 I wouldent have even considerd dateing a man in his 30s why? cause I wanted some one my own age or dam near it. Didn't matter how gorgeous tall/short he might have been he simply wasn't in the same age bracket so it was a automatic no thanks. Thats just how things are just like alot of men will not date cirtin types of women for what ever reason its just how things are. So you must accommodate for that and be more flexible in your search for a mate or choose to be single and hold out..

[somedude81]

I don't think anyone is saying that, actually.

 

I'm interested to know what happens 5 years from now?

Eventually you're going to have to change your target age range, and, well, those women are only going to get older as you do.

Would you not be better setting your sights on women closer to your age NOW before they get 'too old'? If you bump your age limit up 5 years in 5 years time, you're still chasing the same demographic essentially.

 

Forget about 5 years, it's going to change in the next few months.

 

Very soon I'm going to graduate college and I'll no longer interact with young college girls on a daily basis. Just the fact of that requires me to up the minimum age of the women I'll pursue.

 

The main reason I want to date college girls, is because that's what I see everywhere I look.

[sid3]

I don't think anyone is saying that, actually.

 

I'm interested to know what happens 5 years from now?

Eventually you're going to have to change your target age range, and, well, those women are only going to get older as you do.

Would you not be better setting your sights on women closer to your age NOW before they get 'too old'? If you bump your age limit up 5 years in 5 years time, you're still chasing the same demographic essentially.

 

Excellent point.

[somedude81]

Your not getting what people are trying to say are you? yes it is about your age when it comes to dateing most younger women when I was 20-21 I wouldent have even considerd dateing a man in his 30s why? cause I wanted some one my own age or dam near it. Didn't matter how gorgeous tall/short he might have been he simply wasn't in the same age bracket so it was a automatic no thanks. Thats just how things are just like alot of men will not date cirtin types of women for what ever reason its just how things are. So you must accommodate for that and be more flexible in your search for a mate or choose to be single and hold out..

 

Please explain why that when I was 21 years old I was getting rejected by girls who were also 21.

[TigerLilly78]

Please explain why I was 21 years old and getting rejected by girls who were also 21.

 

Because thats how things go thats life it happends you had a decent shot at it far as things being even back then and you struck out..Guess what so did alot of us at that age. But we moved on aged learned from it and used that experience to help us form new relashionships it can be done but not if your going to dwel on the past..

[Lani]

Forget about 5 years, it's going to change in the next few months.

 

Very soon I'm going to graduate college and I'll no longer interact with young college girls on a daily basis. Just the fact of that requires me to up the minimum age of the women I'll pursue.

 

The main reason I want to date college girls, is because that's what I see everywhere I look.

 

I thought you were 'not ready to give up' on girls that age yet?

Now it's just purely due to circumstance?

Come on SD. Regardless of your intention to make every thread about that thread topic alone, it doesn't mean others don't remember your previous ones.

[somedude81]

Because thats how things go thats life it happends you had a decent shot at it far as things being even back then and you struck out..Guess what so did alot of us at that age. But we moved on aged learned from it and used that experience to help us form new relashionships it can be done but not if your going to dwel on the past..

 

The point I was trying to make is that while I'm striking out now, I was striking out back then as well when I was younger, an age wasn't an issue.

 

No matter how old I am, dating has always been hard. Sure it may be harder now than back when I was in my 20's because of my age, but I'm also a lot more confident. Girls just seem to like me more now, than they did back then.

 

I thought you were 'not ready to give up' on girls that age yet?

Now it's just purely due to circumstance?

Come on SD. Regardless of your intention to make every thread about that thread topic alone, it doesn't mean others don't remember your previous ones.

 

I've never changed my words. I've always said that for as long as I'm in college I'm going to focus on college age girls. Once I graduate, I'll switch to OLD to try and meet women and I won't be searching for the same age bracket.

 

Either way, all these posts are off topic. This whole thread was written to talk about one girl.

[normal person]

Please explain why that when I was 21 years old I was getting rejected by girls who were also 21.

 

Whatever it was, it wasn't your age. However, now that you're going after girls who are more than a decade younger than you, your age is probably the first thing they notice.

 

Sometimes girls just ask.

 

It's not a common thing.

 

It's really not an issue even worth talking about here.

 

They wouldn't ask if your age didn't seem odd to them. No one randomly asks other people their age, in college they assume you're the same age as them. They know something's awry with you. When they guess "25" it's because it's a safe bet and they don't want to hurt your feelings by insinuating that you might be 30+ and still an undergrad. Or, they can't fathom a 33 year old undergrad having the audacity to hit on them. Whatever the reason they ask you your age is, it isn't good.

[TigerLilly78]

The point I was trying to make is that while I'm striking out now, I was striking out back then as well when I was younger, an age wasn't an issue.

 

No matter how old I am, dating has always been hard. Sure it may be harder now than back when I was in my 20's because of my age, but I'm also a lot more confident. Girls just seem to like me more now, than they did back then.

 

 

 

.

 

Right it was hard back then for what ever reason lack of confidence and so on but now your actively making it even harder then it has to be by limiting yourself to that cirtin most times harder to please age group that said I don't see why you have to wait to graduate to start trying to date more age appropriate women? Girls "liking" you more now doesn't mean anything until you start getting dates and decent relashionship prospects..

[xxoo]

Please explain why that when I was 21 years old I was getting rejected by girls who were also 21.

 

You answered that: your confidence.

 

Why do you struggle now? Your age is a big factor now.

 

Height and looks were never enough to explain the extent of your dating issues. Show me 100 guys your height and about your looks, and very few of them will have gone a decade without a girlfriend.

[somedude81]

Right it was hard back then for what ever reason lack of confidence and so on but now your actively making it even harder then it has to be by limiting yourself to that cirtin most times harder to please age group that said I don't see why you have to wait to graduate to start trying to date more age appropriate women?

 

Women over 25 aren't interested in a guy who doesn't have a job and is still in college.

 

Girls "liking" you more now doesn't mean anything until you start getting dates and decent relashionship prospects..

 

If you saw how I was with girls and how they reacted to me when I was in my 20's and younger, you'd see that there is a major difference between then and now. Of course I still have miles to go.

[somedude81]

You answered that: your confidence.

 

Why do you struggle now? Your age is a big factor now.

 

Height and looks were never enough to explain the extent of your dating issues. Show me 100 guys your height and about your looks, and very few of them will have gone a decade without a girlfriend.

 

Perhaps it's my height or my confidence or my age. Or some combination of all of them ever since I entered puberty.

 

Either way, I have always struggled with women.

 

There is always something that gives me a handicap, and that's the way it will always be.

[Cristo]

Whatever it was, it wasn't your age. However, now that you're going after girls who are more than a decade younger than you, your age is probably the first thing they notice.

 

 

 

They wouldn't ask if your age didn't seem odd to them. No one randomly asks other people their age , in college they assume you're the same age as them. They know something's awry with you. When they guess "25" it's because it's a safe bet and they don't want to hurt your feelings by insinuating that you might be 30+ and still an undergrad. Or, they can't fathom a 33 year old undergrad having the audacity to hit on them. Whatever the reason they ask you your age is, it isn't good.

 

If a girl is interested in you and you meet her out, she will. I've been asked my age multiple times in multiple settings by women of all ages.

[normal person]

Women over 25 aren't interested in a guy who doesn't have a job and is still in college.

 

And women under 25 probably aren't interested in a 33 year old undergrad. Don't you see that?

 

If a girl is interested in you and you meet her out, she will. I've been asked my age multiple times in multiple settings by women of all ages.

 

Me too. People have asked my age before but it's usually circumstantial, like we're talking about recent birthdays or feeling too old to be at a certain bar, something like that. Keep in mind SD is a 33 year old in college hitting on college aged girls. The circumstances regarding them asking his age are way more conspicuous.

[SJC2008]

Most women who date older are 24+. Rarely will you find a teen/early twenty something deviate outu of 3 years. Before you factor in looks/height/status, you're *already* at a huge disadvantage. How do you not see that?

[Cristo]

Me too. People have asked my age before but it's usually circumstantial, like we're talking about recent birthdays or feeling too old to be at a certain bar, something like that. Keep in mind SD is a 33 year old in college hitting on college aged girls. The circumstances regarding them asking his age are way more conspicuous.

 

This has not been my experience. Usually, women will just randomly ask me. Sometimes, we'll be making out and they'll ask me in between kissing lol.

[somedude81]

Most women who date older are 24+. Rarely will you find a teen/early twenty something deviate outu of 3 years. Before you factor in looks/height/status, you're *already* at a huge disadvantage. How do you not see that?

 

Dude I'm always at a disadvantage. Tell me something new.

[Weezy1973]

Perhaps it's my height or my confidence or my age. Or some combination of all of them ever since I entered puberty.

 

Either way, I have always struggled with women.

 

There is always something that gives me a handicap, and that's the way it will always be.

 

I'm going to go with lack of empathy. At least that is the impression I get from your posts...

[Teknoe]

Girls really don't know how old I am. Nobody thinks I'm older than 25. Just believe me on that.

 

So my not having a job isn't relevant, neither is my age.

 

It seems like girls do know you're (well) over 25, but a few have told you otherwise (out of social etiquette) and you believed their white lies (that you look 24-26).

 

So, college girls know you're over 25, despite what a few have told you over the years after you asked them to guess your age, and they know you're still in college. They probably can connect the dots that your career isn't off the ground yet, and yeah, you're at a huge disadvantage.

 

Women over 25 aren't interested in a guy who doesn't have a job and is still in college.

 

As someone said, women under 25 aren't interested in a 33 year old guy still in college and without a job.

 

You're really stacking the odds against yourself here by solely seeking out 20-22 year olds. You may claim "But that's who I see everyday!" but on your weekends you can go to plenty of places with women ages 28-35. I assume you just enjoy this pipe dream of dating a girl in her early 20s because that's what you wanted when you were 21-25 or so, but it never happened, and now you're still clinging to that hope without adjusting your age range.

 

It sucks to hear the truth sometimes, but what you are doing is a losing proposition. You keep putting yourself into a position that does not yield a high percentage of success. It's no wonder your confidence is so shot. You never give yourself a legit chance to begin with.

[Cristo]

To be honest, I don't even know why a 33 year old guy that wants a relationship even wants girls so young. I'm 27 and, right now, I have a girl that's 21 and very attractive that is interested in dating me. She's a sweetheart, but she's very naive and I think that she may be too young for me.

 

I generally try not to date any woman under 25. So I can't imagine being 33 and changing my mind on that lol.