kungfuduckie Posted March 10, 2005 Share Posted March 10, 2005 i know this question has been asked before many times..... how long do friends with benefits last? in my situation i've been with my guy for a year and three months. am i wasting my time? i obviously have deeper feelings for him. he and i are very close and we always spend whatever free time we have together. we know eachothers families and we both know that we can't date other people. he himself has told me that our "friendship" isn't based just on sex. so do ya'll think its just a friends with benefits relationship or more? Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted March 10, 2005 Share Posted March 10, 2005 Why does he refer to it that way? It sounds to me like regular old dating to me: you spend time together, you are intimate with one another, you are monogamous, etc... Some people have a real problem with putting labels on relationships, because by doing so you are instilling an unspoken set of rules/guidelines into which by the very nature of labeling it, you subconsciously adjust the relationship to fit those rules/guidelines. Is the idea for him that "FWB" means "committed romantic relationship with an expiration date or clear emergency exit" and "dating" means "committed romantic relationship that will be difficult to get out of, should the need arise"? Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted March 10, 2005 Share Posted March 10, 2005 If he wanted a relationship, he'd have told you so already. In his mind it's just a friendship with benefits, unless he says he loves you (and all that other sappy dialogue guys will say when they're in love). Hopefully I'm wrong, but this is what it sounds like to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Illusion24 Posted March 10, 2005 Share Posted March 10, 2005 Let me tell you a little story... I was friends with a guy that I had extreme feeling for, for about 2 1/2 years....I was their for him like a normal gf...Valentines I spent with him, Christmas with him, Thanksgiving with him, good times spending the whole day at the beach drinking and riding his motorcycle the whole 9 yards...and guess what!! HE DIDN'T COMMIT...WASN'T READY FOR ONE!! I even gave him an altimatum and it didn't work..did he love me sure..did he care about me, sure...but he wasn't ready for the commitment...he said he couldn't offer me what I wanted and if I could wait for him...WAIT FOR HIM...HOW MUCH LONGER DID HE WANT ME TO WAIT!! I eventually moved on and just see him as a past learning experience...never give the milk unless they buy they cow!!! Link to post Share on other sites
OCGirl Posted March 11, 2005 Share Posted March 11, 2005 Amen Neversaynever! I did it too. Actually just recently quit mine which has been hard. Had the I love you, if I was looking for a relationship you would be the one...etc lmao that should have been the clue right there! lol He's still stuck on his daughters and even though its been years without her I know it will never change. Adive to you girl... RUN and don't look back! Link to post Share on other sites
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