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How to rebuild the attraction over time after breakup?


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Me and my ex girlfriend of 3 years have split up a month ago

We have 2 boys one is nearly 2 and one is 6 months

 

We split up a month ago and how it happened was I was taking her for granted and she did everything for me

We moved away from all our friends 2 years ago and the only friends she had made are on video games

4 days after we split up she went and met one of the guys she plays video games with and is now seeing him and it's a 3 hour train for her to see him

She was there for 2 weeks till she came back to the flat and I have moved out but we have seen each other almost everyday where I begged her to sort stuff out and she has made it clear that it's over

 

So I stared to go no contact to sort myself out before I try getting her back but today she text me asking to have the kids this weekend so she can go out for her birthday

Do I agree to have the kids and let her go out overnight or do I say no

 

As I want to try and get back with her ASAP but at the moment I understand that there is no attraction and she's happy to have attention from someone else cause she's still hurt over how I treated her

 

Also could anyone give me advice on how to rebuild the attraction over time cause I see the kids at hers every weekend so total no contact is impossible

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sdrawkcaB ssA

Whoa! You said she made it clear that it is over. Now you want her to take you back... That is up to her. Nothing you can do about it. She has made her decision, so don't expect her to change unless she notices that you have changed.

 

Sounds like you both are young enough to grow in life. The directions you both take are up to how you both grow in life. Accept change now and grow to be the person you need to be.

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Yer I understand at the moment there's no hope for us and I'm trying to focus on my life for a few moths so I know I'm happy with myself again and I understand that her new relashionship is in the honeymoon stage so I can't do anything yet

But the main thing is shal I take the kids and let her go out or do I say no and do what I want to cause I don't want to become a doormat but I also don't want her thinking I'm not intrested in the kids

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Do I agree to have the kids and let her go out overnight or do I say no

 

Do not put your children in the middle of your adult drama.

 

Take your kids for the weekend & enjoy being their dad.

 

For the mother of your children to have taken up with some guy she plays video games with a mere 3 days after you & she broke up, you have to ask yourself a few Qs:

 

  • why so fast?
  • are you really sure there wasn't anything going on before?
  • why would you want an immature headgame player like that back?
  • what is best for your children?

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She was talking to them for a wile before we split but I didn't make a big deal about it

And I think she with him to she don't feel hurt about dumping me cause over the time we been together I became to relaxed with the idea that she wouldn't leave cause for the kids ect

To be honest aswell I never treated her the way I should of

And I want to work stuff out cause I do love her and my kids are my world

 

For now I'm trying to go no contact with her but still see my boys

So after she's forgot the negative parts of our relashionship and I've used the time to really become myself again

Cause we have had loads of good times and I think the stress of 2 kids didn't help us

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