Re: platonic friendship

[Katie]

Yes, you worry too much. enjoy the company of this lady and don't worry about other people's comments. it is very hard to find a very good friend. I wish i could have a true friend who i can talk to without feeling like i'm a burden. good luck.

[Rachel]

Dear Friend;

 

You are being too harsh and critical to yourself. Be kinder and gentler to your body and your heart. Just because you are severly disabled, doesn't mean another person can't have feelings for you platonic or otherwise, or vise versa.

 

I know its hard to NOT care about what other people in your surroundings think, escpecially since you are there all the time, and probably dependent on some of them for care. However, rest assured that they are human too, and deep down very pleased that someone cares about you and vise versa. Even if they do snicker, rest assured that they probably do care.

 

HOWEVER

[DCW]

First of all, I'm very sorry to hear about your disability. I think that it is wonderful that you've found a friend. If neither of you want anything more than a platonic friendship, then there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. As far as gossipmongers are concerned, you shouldn't live your life for others. You have to live it for YOURSELF. Do what makes you happy. If certain individuals have nothing better to do with their time than create rumors, then let them take what little joy they can from that miserable existence. Do what makes you happy, and to Hell with everyone else. I hope that you continue to find happiness with your new-found friend for many years to come. May you both be blessed immeasurably in the future.

i am 40yr old male, severely physically disabled living in nursing home. Have developed platonic friendship with 48yr old single female, born again Christian. She stops by to visit, have had coffee & dessert together in nursing home environment. And email each other occasionally. Nothing going on but hugs and conversation.

 

I am keeping in the open public areas not alone in my room behind closed doors so nobody can wonder what is going on. She has offered car rides which i decline because i don't want to be in a vunerable situation. Neither one of us desire physical/romantic relationship. She is starting to bring small gifts and i am wondering if we are becoming too emotionally attached. Also, what gossip mongers think about this friendship and whether they are laughing at us. "oh look, the disabled guy has a 'girlfriend', isn't that cute." "They shouldn't be so friendly." I enjoy her company but don't want to hurt her reputation or mine by having our relationship seen as silly or disgusting by others. Do i worry to much?

[Miss Mojo]

how your relationship can be seen as 'silly' or 'disgusting' is beyond me. i see this relationship as genuine and heartfelt. you are so lucky.

 

this sounds like a great friendship. what anyone else thinks is absolutely none of their business. you are a human being with an enormous capacity for happiness and love, and you are both in the perfect situation where you both know what you want and have landed it. you both enjoy each others company, so ride with it you lucky fella!!!

 

you are worrying too much. only the small-minded people out there would judge you. the vast majority of people would be happy for you, because you are happy. just try not to feel self-concsious about being a human being with needs and wants, and don't be afraid to be happy.

 

a lot of people would be envious of your situation, and if anyone snickers at you, that's probably the problem - they are envious and don't have what you do.

 

go with the flow - i wish i had such a nice platonic friendship with a guy!!

[Edgar]

Thank you so much for your kind, caring and thoughtful responses to my post. You really touched my heart.